Sorry it took me a while to respond to the post, I've been in Malaysia for a while, ill and busy with work.
Thank you for your many nice reactions. As foxmulder wrote, they are very sincere and comforting.
You are right about one thing, I indeed can't get all I want in life, and its in my nature to always try getting whatever I want. I need goals and ambitions to keep myself going, and tend to rather try something and fail, then not try at all.
Down side to that, I also tend to not give up on a matter, not matter what happens, guess its the same thing with this relationship. Feeling unable to "fix" the situation causes me a great deal of suffering.
Then again, there has been no other girl in my life ever, who could make me feel the way she made me feel.
So in a way I feel I shouldn't give up on her, even though things look very grim right now.
Please do not lecture me on Christianity. I come from a nation with a strong Christian tradition, have been exposed to, and studied, the various aspects of Christianity my whole life. Next to that, I have quite a bit of general knowledge of Jewism, Islam, Hinduism and Budhism. Knowledge that proved quite usefull when moving to Asia, since it helps me understand people better.
No I don't pray a lot, don't feel its necessary to bother God all the time. As for going to Church, I don't do that a lot either. In my homeland there are to many people in church who seem to constantly condemn other people for being different. In Asia church seems to be more a social event. People don't go there to be with God, but to make friends, going to church is but a means to kill their loneliness and be friends. As I have often seen in Singapore, the loneliness of particularly foreigners is often exploited by church groups to increase their church members.
Again typically within such a friend group, the ones that behave as the most devoted gain the most popularity.
As for Jesus, I see him as a good and kind person who did good to everyone. Thought us to be loving and compassionate, even towards our enemies and those outcast by society. Seeing people claim that their faith is the truth. Look down on people of other faiths. Helping people to promote their faith, instead of just helping to help a person in need. And claim that some people are not Christians or not faithful because they don't spend a lot of time on their knees hardly seems to be in line with Jesus his teachings.
So this is how I choose to live my life, not looking at God all the time to make things better, but try do what I can myself.
I try to be good to all, and even if I do harm, I try to set things straight. I don't judge and condemn people that are different, accept them the way they are, even though I may not share their views.
This is also the reason I accepted my girlfriend as my partner, even though she was a Muslim, to me it didn't matter.
I'm very happy to hear your story, the way you describe your relationship with your wife is quite simular to how I imagined my relationship.
Yes I know that in the Islam Jews and Christians are considered "People of the Book", and believe in the same God (Just follow the teachings of different Prophets)
I once, out of curiousity, read the sections of the Qu'ran that tell about Jesus, I was quite amazed that the story is about 80% the same.
It was because of the concept of believing in the same God, that I had hoped things would work out between me and my gf.
To her different religions also didn't matter, and since our religions had a lot in common, we considered it even less a problem.
However, as I have stated many times by now, the community around her had a different opinion.
As for our children, well I've always held the opinion that children should not be labeled and bound to a religion on birth, but should eventually choose form themselves.
Instead they should be given a wide exposure. So typically my children would have been raised with both Christian and Muslim influence, like aworkingmum describes earlier in this discussion.
To many people of my generation in my homeland were baptised at birth, and eventually dropped their faith because they simply didn't feel anything for it anymore.
So why not let children choose their own faith? Only God can decide who is right, and I think God probably wouldn't care in which way he is worshiped.
I wish I could sit down with this girl, talk things over, and work out a solution. However she is ignoring all attempts of me to contact her.
She tends to do this when she doesn't know how to deal with a situation, (as said by herself) and shuts out the element that causes her pain (In this case me).
Unfortunatly this also makes it hard for me to try and solve things, and my situation more grim.