Posted by
ms1
16 yrs ago
we started with a new helper in april. initially, although i gave her the house rules and routine, i just let her get used to it and didn't make a fuss when she was working. But i noticed that she was quite forgetful. she broke the vacuum, stained the sofa permanently and dropped bleach on my quilt cover. now her work standard has dropped even more and she claims that the work is too much. She has to clean 1 room and 1 bathroom each day. that's it, and cook dinner. she has from 8.00 to 3.00. Is that too much? when i sat her down to talk yesterday she started to cry. Saying that she is worried about her home, she is homesick etc. and she doesn't like to "talk" i.e discuss about how to improve things. How do i tell her then.?I don;t want to stand there demanding or being too strict. I would rather she understand why she is doing something and my standards. IS there a particular way so that the response is more positive...... instead of tears. And i didn't even start saying anything and she started crying! I re-assured her that we really like her and she is doing a good job, but each house works different so she needs to understand how ours works. How do u all handle "talks" with a helper. At the end of the day i would like a happy employee but also someone who works well with me. Very confused?
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"She has to clean 1 room and 1 bathroom each day. that's it, and cook dinner. she has from 8.00 to 3.00. Is that too much? "
Goodness no.
"when i sat her down to talk yesterday she started to cry. Saying that she is worried about her home, she is homesick etc. and she doesn't like to "talk" i.e discuss about how to improve things. How do i tell her then.?I"
You did the right thing. She is being a drama queen. Some people are beyond help. She may be one of them. Give her one firm warning. If she shows no improvement within a day or two let her go.
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i have seen similar situation with some of my friends and with our second helper - all i can say, starts off bad but sorts itself out in 3-4 months - if she does not - maybe time to let her go... Ours started with tears, etc and me saying "we like you" etc etc.. did take her 4 months tho to start doing it just the way we want it... Hang in there another couple of months and then see how she is?
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ms1
16 yrs ago
Thanks, we don't want to terminate. She is doing everything.... i think to her best ability.... but she does need to improve on little bits here and there. She is also very forgetful. So i am constantly chasing up on things. I don't want to go to work and worry if things have been done at home. That's all. I was wondering how to deal with it differently. I would like to see a positive response instead of tears?
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3-4 months? Improvement can be a long term thing but the sort of behavior shown by this helper is just not acceptable for an employee. Unless she immediately improves you need to terminate her. It's not like you're asking her to become a supernanny+a gourmet chef+the world's best cleaner. You're not asking for much and she is not even delivering that.
Look at it this way: If she worked in a supermarket or in an office, would she still have a job? I don't think so.
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ms1 - did you hire her straight from Phil or was she already here - I find that girls from Phil indeed take a while to get used to things - only natural tho of course. so if you hire from Phil - expect a few months adjustment period and tears - all i can say...
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ms1
16 yrs ago
no we interviewed her here when she was still working ( 2years) . Spoke to the employer who said she was fine etc. Had the interview where all duties were explained. she came to the apt and visited. played with the children etc. Now she says the place is too big , and she doesn't have enough time because she has to watch the kids in the afternoon? I know they often change after the contract is signed , but we tried our best to list out all expectations. And then she says she would rather not discuss it ?! I was perhaps too gentle in the beginning hoping she would ease into things. I agree that she needs time though.
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i would have a problem if she does not want to discuss it - that is not a good start, ms1 - how can you communicate with her properly if she shuts you out. I would say wait a bit and if it does not improve, do not feel like you have to hang on to her - there are tons and tons of great DHs out there!
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Well, cleaning 1 room and 1 bathroom each day really isn't much at all ... think about how long it would take to do it yourself. I'd suggest that if she feels it's too much for her, tell her you're happy to do it one day, with her watching so she knows exactly how you like things done, and to see how long it takes. It's my guess that it would take little more than an hour, if that. After all, if you're cleaning a room regularly, it really won't be that dirty that it's going to take a long time. If it took a couple of hours, that means she'd still have 5 hours left to prepare for dinner!! What's she been doing with her time? If she still thinks it's too much then I'd suggest she's just being lazy and I'd have to let her go ... you're really not asking too much of her.
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WP Renovation, it is unclear what you mean by your post. I for one do not understand.
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ms1
16 yrs ago
axpat38 : yes i saw that post and i couldn't understand it either.
in any event i have decided i will speak to her again. explain that discussion is important and she can't escape it with tears. It is a job at the end of the day and regular intervention is necessary to allow for improvement. it is nothing personal. it's really the tears that bothered me! and just a month and a bit into the contract.
i also thought that checklists before entering a room are good so that she can't forget and finish all the expected duties. hopefully now it will flow quicker and she won't feel it is too much. thanks for all the replies.
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lasez
16 yrs ago
my friend has a helper who is very forgetful as well. she makes sure she writes down everything for her helper. even very simple instructions.
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i always got lists of my chores around the house even little ones. its not that i can remember but it helps me arrange my schedule better. and i get things done too which is a plus.. coz i get a lot of free time if i stick to my lists
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she came to the apt and visited. played with the children etc. Now she says the place is too big , and she doesn't have enough time because she has to watch the kids in the afternoon?...
Now my question is..Do you have any children?if so, how many? coz cleaning 1 room and 1 bathroom is very easy...but cleaning while babysitting is another thing..
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ms1
16 yrs ago
2 kids that go to school from 7.30 to 3.30. So in my opinion there is plenty of time. anyways i have had a chat with her now explaining that with my staff i always discuss.... so she will just have to get used to it rather than me just listing out stuff to her. And i also told her that i thought the chores were not too much and used to do the same in OZ myself. things are getting better but she is oversensitive when things are pointed out.
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