Dishonesty and Advice

The most annoying part of DHs stealing things from one's family is not only inconvenience and economic loss, it is the emotional hurt. Sometimes, we treat them so well but the return is heart breaking. After many bad experience, I would not expect too much.


Want to share some experience:


The experience of myself and many of my friends tell me that many DH do take things away from their employer for various purposes - for their own use, exchange with other DHs, offer for sale, etc. Some employer do not ask for receipt for DH's expenditure. There have been DHs who got half box of detergent, rice, softener, etc. from other DHs (obviously stolen from the employers) and claim the full price from the employer. Apart from detergent and soap, food items are also very popular. My friend's sister-in-law returned home early one day and found her maid in the street near her home selling mushrooms and conpoy taken from her flat to another DH.

My maids have also taken things from us like rice, detergents, shampoo, soap.....,etc.

While we do not eat rice ourselves, the rice is only for the consumption of the DH one person, 8KG of rice can disappear in 2-3weeks. A large box of cloths detergent can disappear in 2 weeks (only 2 of us in the family, no kids, not much cloths to wash). 2 large bottles of Woolite (delicate clothes detergent) can disappear in 5 days..........and more


Another DH was terminated, an employment agency in central handled a DH termination case yesturday 21 June 2005:

The employer hired a DH to take care of the old age and sick father. There have been repeated incidencts of missing things from the family. DH has also borrowed money from the employer. Since the employer had to count on the DH to take care of the sick father, max. forebearance is given to the DH- until the father found his precious ring missing. The DH denied everything until a prawn receipt is found.


Another family has a DH worked with them for 8 years. They kept their precious jewels wrapped and folded with clothes and plastic bags under the mattress of the bed. After the DH finished contract and returned home, they found that all the jewels are gone, only empty boxes are wrapped and kept under the mattress.


So many many others .......



If you are curious or suspicious, go to a prawn shop in central on Sunday or Saturday, queues of South Asian women can be found lining up waiting to realise money from golden necklaces, rings, ...etc.



Protection


Lock all valuables.


Keep regular check of expensive items and keep them tidily placed, e.g. expensive handbags, underwear & clothes, nice towels, expensive bedsheets, etc. (after doing so, I lost less of this kind of items)


Do not keep too much stock of rice, food items, detergents, soaps, boz tisses, etc. (Everytime I bought 2 or more quantity of household items, they disappear extraordinarily fast!)


Ask the DH immediately if things are missing to allow her to explain. Give her warning letter to record the incident. Repeated records of wrong doings by DH allow you to terminate her by "Summary Dismissal" - you do not need to give her notice or payment in lieu of notice. Make sure you have records of repeated warnings.


Please always ask for a receipt to avoid other DHs selling half bottles of household items to your DH.


After suspecting being forced to share my skin care products with my DH (expensive skin care products are consumed at an extraordinarily rapid rate, DH inevitably denied using them and I was worried about hygiene), to avoid further trouble, I bought a medium size transparent plastic box with a lock to lock up all skin care products.

Guess what? Thereafter, I saved a lot on skin care because now the caviar eye essence, brightening serum, caviar lux cream......all last 2-3 times more! Isn't it amazing?

How can you can live in your own house with things locked up? Maybe you need to fire your existing helper and hire a new honest helper. I just cannot imagine living in my own home having to count, check everything every day. There are always bad apples in all nationality but to live like this seems very weird to me.

My neighbor's helper was arrested for stealing from Festival Walk. When her room was searched, the employer's found many of their own items and parent's belongings in her room. Everyone adored this helper and we were quite shocked. She was terminated and sent home immediately.