Posted by
A Mum
19 yrs ago
Can anyone let me know how they work out the food allowance for their helper? If you provide food for them, is this 3 meals a day? How about snacks and food on Sunday? We give our helper a food allowance but think she is skimming off food she buys for our own grocery money. Any advice? I guess I already know the answer, it's really the principle of her being dishonest ..
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$300/month..check the employment contract sign between you and your helper..
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If you think she is skimming. Check the receipts carefully whenever she returns from grocery shopping. If you do this for a couple of weeks, I think she will get the message.
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@@
19 yrs ago
We give our helper $500 per month for food on top of her salary of $4600. We do not expect her to buy rice, pasta, coffee, tea or the basics that are always in the kitchen.
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Even if the helper receives $500/month, it means she has around $17/day...how is she supposed to pay for 3 meals a day from that amount???
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Not getting paranoid - getting petty. Wow helping herself to your milk. Relax a bit - its not that important.
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putting marks on milk is going a bit far though.
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cd
19 yrs ago
We give our helper $500 a month allowance, and the only stuff of ours she gets is water, toilet paper and washing powder. And the same as above if I have things that I know we will not use I give her that.
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Sheesh King ... seriously petty. As you see, most other people are giving $500 a month (which is still not much), but you're such a tightwad you're only giving $300 ($10/day for three meals) AND marking the milk. How would you make ends meet on such a paltry sum? She's probably driven to nick a bit of your tucker out of sheer hunger!
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mel
19 yrs ago
I have just hired a second help because i have too. When it was just my one helper we did not give her an allowance but she aet everything we aet but now with 2 it might be cost effective for us to give an allowance or is it. We somtime shop for food at olivers or great especially for food you cannot get at the Park N Shop, before I bought slightly extra for the maid but now buying for 2 seems a bit much. It's just that I didn't want them to be preparing 2 meals on top of the work they were doing. Some input please. Thanks.
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green raised a good point. make sure the helper understand that if she wants something extra she HAS TO ASK. And to ask - all it requires is some honesty and manner!!!
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My helper eats whatever is available in the house for her three meals. She has to pay for her own snacks and food for days off. Since she cooks for us, we eat the same foods. I wouldn't feel right if she made beef stew for us and while we're feasting, she's eating cup noodles because of the restraint on her food budget. In the end, I think we have a better relationship (it's not all about money) and she tends to learn to cook different foods.
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King says "it is the fact she does it thinking it is her right".
I think that is probably accurate and therfore the problem. You therefore have a choice.
1) Make your stance on what she can take clear and in doing so perhaps lose some good-will in the process.Then helping herself would be a breach of trust - at the moment I don't think it is.
2) Make your stance clear and increase the food allowance to compensate. Reasonable enough but I understand you think you are paying her enough.
3) As I suggested above - relax and don't worry about it. It was never about taking the milk and bread you said yourself. Well surely enough people have posted that it doesn't seem unreasonable for her to do this.
No matter how much you pay her I would still think you were stingy if you marked your milk!
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@@
19 yrs ago
Bluesky, I'm curious, how much do you think we should be giving for a food allowance?
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@@,
I don't really know how much I would pay as we have the same arrangement as 'momster'.
It's just when you start thinking about their daily food allowance at $300 or $500 per month, I just wonder how they manage. I don't know how I would...
I do agree though, if there haven't been prior arrangements made, the helper should ask before they take something.
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@@
19 yrs ago
Bluesky Thanks, I wasn't being cheeky simply curious.
I'm glad to say our helper says she is very happy with the arrangement, she said it make a big difference that she can use the basics which we alway have in stock and only needs to purchase fresh meat and vegetables.
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hi,
our helper basically eats everything we eat. if it is something special (xtc icecream, mangosteens, papaya or some special jam or something bought for my husband she knows not to eat it). if i buy an expensive cut of meat or fish then she does not have this either. i buy her her own fish supply for such occasions. this way she can make her own dishes. we donot give her a food allowance as since she can eat everything there is not need to. this works best for us as we always has leftovers and my husband refuses to eat leftovers. she does not have a problem.
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*V*
19 yrs ago
Having to grow up in Indonesia, we had 3 maids in the house + 2 drivers. My parents treated them like part of the family but at the same time drew a line that they were our employees. We provided them w/ whatever we eat (they do no eat w/ us tho), rice, meat, veggies, fruits...etc. And they drank whatever is in the kitchen (except alcohols). My parents even paid for their tuitions in whatever they wanted to learn (sewing classes, English lessons...etc). i guess I learnt to treat my helper just like how my parents treated theirs.
At the end of the day, how much do we spend going to get our haircuts? lunch? dinner? Or even just taxies?! I understand it's not the $300 or $500, it's the principle. When you have problems w/ her behaviours, why not talking to her first? To ask what she needs, if she's having a hard time to eat on $300/$500...etc? I believe if you show her the respect, she would return you with respect and honesty - i know some of you would argue that they are the one to show you respect first, but we are all human beings and this is not a "slave" society!!. At the end of the day, they are all here to make a living to support their families back home.
Take a deep breath and relax...
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suze
19 yrs ago
I agree with above,they can all use some of their salary to put towards food. We pay our helper a food allowance and given her free rein of staples but her idea of staples and mine are different. Used to nark me when she had things that were clearly not staples
but now just let it go!
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this discussion is getting sadder and sadder.
jbebeb, you do realize that most dh's send nearly all of their salary back to the philippines/indonesia/sri lanka to feed their extended families? are you are begrudging this person a few slices of bread?
No matter what the contract says, I think your attitude is extremely mean-spirited.
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*V*
19 yrs ago
Oh my god... what happened to good humanities?
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cd
19 yrs ago
I'll probablt get hounded to but I agree with jbebeb.
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cd
19 yrs ago
oops, that should have said 'I'll probably get hounded too'
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I had a DH who lived out, was not given a food allowance but ate what was in the house - or was given supplies - bought bags of rice, cereal, vegetables for her supplies for the evening meals when she went home early. However, it was brought to my attention that she felt it was within her rights to take home frozen bags of Tyson chicken from my freezer, sausages brought up from Australia to feed her and her roomates - because she was not given a food allowance (she was given food). When I went on holidays she was given money for her food. It was not until she had already left my employ that I found out how generous she had been with my food supply.
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tly
19 yrs ago
i have to agree with jbebeb... the start of the thread simply pointed out whether a dh has the right to help themselves to whatever food there is lying around the house. Just because we think that the dh is having a rotten hard time in HK doesn't give them the right to just take whatever they feel like in our own kitchen. So yes, if their allowance seems to be too low, then raise it, if we don't want to increase it, then offer more food that she can have access to. This was the basic premise of this thread... but what its leading to is that alot of people think dh's here are to be pitied because they live such a hard life. Do you know that when they go back to the Philippines, they are the "stars"? Almost all blue collared workers, nurses, bank tellers, etc, aspire to work as a dh overseas. Heck, they make more than I ever did as an IT person in Manila! And just like jbebed mentioned, there are those unfortunate dh's that are abused, but they are the minority. Don't pity them because you feel "sorry" that they are "only" domestic helpers. They don't want you to. For them, they are happy as larry making what they make for the same amount of work they would be doing anyways if they got a job back home.
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*V*
19 yrs ago
It's not that a DH has the "right" to take whatever she wants in the house, but I think some of us are just pointing out that all we need are clear communication and bigger hearts.
Yes, they save up what they earn in HK and go back to their countries, even able to build big houses...etc. We are all here doing the same thing ain't we? Making good money here in HK, paying less tax than back in UK/US and buy properties back home and/or else where?!
... and BTW, highest DH salaries in Asia is probably Japan - if i remember correctly, it's about US$20-30/hour, that's just simply because it's more expensive to live in Japan, hence what some of we had pointed out earlier, you cannot compare simply just by what they get here in HK, you also have to look at the average living expenses...HK salaries in general is higher than most other countries in Asia because of the living expenses here is higher.
We are all "lucky" to be living in HK/Asia, to have helpers here, some of us probably would not be able to afford to have helpers back in UK/US, so why not be generious because we really can?! At the end of the day, I don't think the issue here is what a maid does with her food allowrance, it's for our peace of mind thinking that our maids are not eating on HK$10 per meal...no?
Back to the orginial poster - After reading so many opinions, I'm sure you have your own thoughts about this, so please do speak to your helper, tell her what's bothering you, set a clear rule about taking food from the house (and whatever else is bothering you) and do what you think is right.
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cd
19 yrs ago
Just because a DH is working sundays doesn't mean they don't get a day off. We have just hired a new helper who has chosen to have saturday as his day off. Also no helper we've had has come through an agency so they haven't had any agency fees to pay. So basically they get $4k a month to spend totally on themselves if they want to, theres a lot of people in HK who would like to have that much to themselves.
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I think it is great that there are generous folks out there who offer more than the minimum, but I have to agree with jbebeb.
When I first came across this forum a year ago, I was like the others. This was only reinforced when I saw the helpers in my neighborhood supermarket buying only the marked-down perishable food items. But now, I don't think it is unreasonable for a helper to spend some of her salary on food if she wants to eat more or better. After all, she is saving nearly 100% of her income. If we could all only save 100% of our income and send it home/spend it on family... There are people living in Hong Kong who work harder and make less after expenses, as cd rightly pointed out. These poor local workers probably spend even less than HK$300 per month on food. While the minimum helper salary may seem like a pittance to many here, it isn't a pittance to the helpers. Otherwise, they wouldn't come here. Personally, I would like to see everyone, not just helpers, eating better, but as someone else said, you need to look at the package in its entirety. At the minimum wage, a helper can save at least US$4K per year -- not an insignificant amount.
To the poster who said you can't compare helper wages in HKG those in Malaysia, why can't you? If you are using PPP, then you need to actually spend some money before it is relevant. Helpers don't spend much out of pocket, and Hong Kong can actually be relatively inexpensive for basic needs.
Sure, I think it is sinful that the HK government allows some (more than a few) employers to take advantage of their helpers, but for the majority, working in Hong Kong is a good deal, with or without a food allowance. Is it a better deal than the one you are on? NO. Is it your personal responsibility to give a higher food allowance? Great if you can be more generous, but I wouldn't be critical of anyone who feels HK$300 is sufficient for a minimum food allowance, as long as everything else in the contract is being adhered to.
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Fresh groceries are cheap if you buy at the markets rather than the over priced grocery stores. I can feed a family of 6 for $100 of fresh vegies for at least a week from my local fresh produce stall - that's only $100 over per month of the helpers " measly " $300 per month to feed just one - and I feed 6. Going on this rate a DH could easily feed herself/himself with a variety of fresh veges and fruit for $16 -20 a week - leaving plenty for meat, fish, eggs, rice tinned food and maybe eating out modestly with her friends once a month. If you shop and eat wisely, $300 a month is enough to live on for one person.
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I agree it's not unreasonable for a DH to spend some of her salary on food. I do think it's petty and all round rather strange to mark the milk carton in case she takes any - after all this is the person who has been entrusted with the care of one's children. So she's trusted with the children but not with the milk?
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tly
19 yrs ago
But that's the point, wouldn't you want the person who's caring for your child to teach your child honesty? If before I accuse my helper of taking without asking, I'd like to make sure first. I'll probably come up with another method, but I'd do something. Helpers here usually become the main caregivers of children. I'd prefer it if I knew my helper was teaching my child good values, and the best way of finding that out is if she had these values herself.
ueber, you know, as cynical as that may sound, it also makes alot of sense. Why don't they? Helpers here make ridiculous amounts. Lots of expats, as mentioned in a thread before think 5K is a joke. So they're the force behind jacking up the price of helpers here. If it wasn't for their pride, heck, 3-5k sounds great for a local!
And while we're on this subject, you guys should check out this article:
http://webb-site.com/articles/nominwage.htm
Read the bit on Domestic Helpers.
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I agree honesty is important.
What I can't understand is why some employers will not allow their helpers to share some basic supplies. In my view insisting helpers keep ALL food stuff separate is extremely petty. Milk for tea, rice, flour etc costs so little - why are some employers unwilling to share these basic goods with the people who live in their house and care for their children?
I would be more worried about my children growing up learning to treat employees as second-class citizens.
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300$ food allowance for domestic helper is not enough, employers know that. It is the law but employers should be considerate in adding extra money. Maybe thats why your helper is skimming out food.
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I agree with you jimmylee,absolutetly right.I wont mind sharing our food to my helper as they are also a human being that need food and drink.My helper is the one who's taking care of my children and at the same time doing all the household job,why not give them a proper meals?
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Kimmi
19 yrs ago
Im in the process of employing a helper, I was just going to let her eat and drink anything thats in the house and eat meals with us. I think I will also give her the recommended $300 for extra snacks and things she may like. Do you think this is OK?
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No Kimmi - offer extra money as an incentive for work performed well - not just as a given, otherwise you may be taken for a ride.
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Kimmi
19 yrs ago
That sounds like a good idea. So the food allowance is only given if they dont eat with the family then?. Im finding it a little confusing at the moment. I really want to do the right thing as the helper earns so little. I also dont want to be taken for a ride also. Im hoping to find a really nice helper who is happy with us also.
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Kimmi, as mentioned before, the helpers pay is low compared to what you may earn -how ever the money they earn is their own - to do what they want with it. My helper of 2.5 years in that time managed to save 80% of her salary leave HK for good at the end of her contract, having paid off her house, added extensions, bought a few animals to start off a small farm, bought a washing machine, an oven to bake and sell cakes from,and a motorcycle for her husband to make extra money taking people places and she had money left over. She saved about 10,000 US dollars from her salary and did all this, invested her money wisely and is now at home with her family having given them a leg up to become self sufficient and earn their own money.
She ate with us, and was paid the minimum and had extra cash given to her when a particularly good job was done, CNY, and birthday. When we were away we gave her $300 for food - if it was 1 week or 4 weeks. so it evened out in the end.
Your comment "I'm hoping to find a really nice helper who is happy with us also" needs to have added - who does a good job.
Start out paying the minimum, have her eat your food and if that doesn't work out reasses the situation. It will probably cost you more to feed her from your pantry.
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Kimmi
19 yrs ago
I dont earn anything myself anymore just relying on husbands wage, Im having to employ a helper under Dr's orders as I have a medical problem and unable to do the necessary chores at home which is really getting me down. So Im new to all this and HK. It helps getting advice from others though just to see what they do, thanks.
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It is ridiculous to assert that the people who pay only $300 for food or only minimum wage for salary are somehow immoral for doing so. It is further ignorant to assume that everyone here is a white tower resident with money to burn. Some here may be a two income family just to make ends meet, pay for their extended family and save to buy a house for their own living. Some may even need a domestic to take care of their elderly parents. It is also not any ones shame to have offered these FDH an income that supports their whole family back home and enough comfort here to have many luxury’s they can’t have in their native land (like clean water and a cool comfortable home environment. I am not saying that employers should not be aware of their helpers predicament or that an employer does not need to act morally. But some would argue that simply supporting a contract to its full term is doing significant moral good. I certainly know from the hiring process that there are a lot of FDH seeking jobs and none of them want to go back to their home land.
Now here’s what I have bought for just 298.80 in my local Parknshop. I am certain I could have cut at least 30 dollars off in the local markets.
3000 grams Noodles
5000 grams Rice
1800 grams Potato
6500 grams assorted vegetables including Chinese green vegetables, carrots, lettuce, cucumbers and squashes.
4 liters UHT full fat (same price for skimmed) milk
15 gala apples
15 oranges
3000 grams assorted meat (Pork, Chicken, Fish and Canned Ham)
Daily Nutrition (better than the RDA of any western country on all aspects)
326 grams carbohydrate (excluding fruits and vegetables)
230 grams fruit and vegetable
100 grams meat per day (fat & protein)
133ml milk per day (fat & protein)
Monthly expense $298.80
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Kimmi
19 yrs ago
phew, so sorry if I've got some people's backs up here, I only wanted some advice. I'll just might go else where to ask questions next time, as I said Im new to HK and just getting used to the way of life. Thank you
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Kimmi
19 yrs ago
Thanks Mrs Miggins for the advice, I know I am a softy and a have a very easy going nature. Im more aware now of how to start things off. I will start looking up all the info set out on the Gov website and prepare myself. Thanks
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Kimmi
19 yrs ago
Mrs Miggins, I know we should supply toilet roll, how about toiletries things like shampoo and soap for helper to use?
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Dear Kimmi
I moved to HK 3 years ago and we're now onto our 4th DH, all from the Philipines.
The first one we had was 'inherited' from my husband's family (I have moved into my husband's family home and they have always had DH). She left because she was stealing from the grocery money, household appliances and even some jewellery. The second one was older and very very lazy. (There are only two of us in the house and she couldn't manage our clothes + the housekeeping). The third one went to Canada by her own choice and we're now onto our 4th. She is a very nice lady who tries her best and is a good cook.
We pay her slighlty above the govt wage, but we don't pay her or any of our DH the allowance as we provide all the food. We eat very well and the DH is welcome to eat whatever is in the fridge as well. If she wants some fresh fish from the market, she can buy some and normally it is less than HK$20. So it is not going to break the bank as she might do this only once a month.
We provide toilet paper and tissues, but no toiletries. She gets to use washing powder and softner. I think we're being reasonable and I find that she is careful in what she uses ie. doesn't want to be too wasteful etc. She also gets extra money sometimes for Chinese New Year or her birthday.
Some HK people really have a different attitude towards the maids though....my sister in law fired her maid for using their toilet paper.
I guess you have to be comfortable and if you've not had help before, it's hard to adjust to having someone around. It's almost like being at work. You have to be nice and reward, but sometimes have to reprimand too.
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Kimmi
19 yrs ago
Thanks annieh for the advice. I know what you mean about having to adjust to having an extra person around. Especially doing most of the stuff I have always done myself in the past and believe it or not took pride in. I hope it does work out ok as this time around I really need the help. I suppose we are fortunate enough to be HK where's there's plenty of DH wanting work.
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Dear Kimmie
I understand exactly what you mean about taking pride in the housework!!! Unfortunately its not the done thing here...and my work hours dont help either.
Good luck with your DH
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