What do I do

Hi, it is time for me to renew my helpers contract. she has been with me for 2 years and has been very good, there has been some issues but I wouldn't call them major. Actually I have 2 maids one 2 look after my 18 mth and one to look after my dog it may sound a bit extreme but I work and leave town a lot so I did not want to give her any excuse not to give her 100 percent when I am not In town. I am leaving my job now and plan to stay with my daughter and plan to try to have a nother baby. I plan to keep my first maid and have helped my second maid get a job. My first maid now is not that happy because she said that it will mean that she will have lots to do once the 2nd baby comes even though she does not get along with the other maid she would prefer if we got another help someone like her friend. I really liked her a lot but am very heavy hearted to renew her contract at the moment. Before she used to get an allowance for food but with one person I've said that we will go back to her eating with us and now she has come back with a list of things that she would like to have in our grocery list. When she come for an interview she had left her previous employer after 3 months saying that they don't treat her with respect, but she said the work was never the issue they had 2 kids. The new contract her salary has been increased she get travel allowance, eats with us and has cable TV and DVD provided, she is even allowed to have her friends over in her room if she wants on her day off. I have a feeling that it is because the other girl has got a job which only requires her to look after 2 dogs and a household without children and may feel that the other girl got a better bargain.

Well, there are plenty of maids out there. I would sit down with this maid before you renew her contract and ask her if she will be able to cope with 2 children, making it clear to her that this is what the job requires.

For food, I think it's reasonable for her to ask for certain things, as she may not like the things you tend to eat (I'm presuming you and she are of different nationalities) - as long as she's not asking for lobster every night...

If she would prefer a job where she only needs to look after dogs, like your other maid, then you will have to accept this and find someone else.

She and I do eat the same food, when she first signed the contract, before we hired the 2nd girl we provided the food as well and all was fine. Ok food is not the issue. She does not like looking after my dog she prefers looking after my daughter and she has been good, she is just not happy looking after 2 kids and doing house work. You are right there is lots of other maids out there is just that we were fine until I did sit down and talked about the change . Now she wants to go back to nepal every year how many maids do that. She even tried by saying that employers are suppose to pay for the trip. I just hate to start going thru the interview process finding someone you like and all I guess I am just blowing stem.

i have to say.... maybe you should just let her go. don't hire another maid if you don't want to. i just interviewed about 30 maids, from asiaxpat and some agencies. the asiaxpat maids know that western employers are more generous, therefore demanding more. on the average, most experienced maids asked for 4000 hkd plus 1 ticket back to their country every year. the less experienced ones demand at least 3700. by law, employers are to pay for 1 ticket for the whole contract, which is 2 years. the worst case was this maid asking for 4500 plus 2 tickets per year. i'm sure she's very capable but we have to put a stop to this. my mom's maid has been working for at least 8 years, and she only gets one trip per two years. doesn't take her day off on sunday if my mom needs her. she's willing to take monday or tuesday off. and her salary? the minimum wage. she's very clean, trustworthy, etc. my mom trained her of course. but the thing is, she's happy and content. back in the philippines, a maid gets 2500 pesos MAX. that's 400 hkd at the most. so for these maids to ask for 4000, shouldn't be tolerated. she wants another maid because it means that she'll have less to do. you employ a maid to help you, not to stress you out and give in to their demands.

Once a helper is "spoiled".. it's kind of hard to go back to the BEFORE state. I also can understand it's human nature, and natural reaction from her part. From 2 helpers in a household, back to one (herself), and then you plan to stay home and have another baby, and then you cut her food allowance.... it's understandable. So, I think you don't have much of a choice but to hire a new helper who hasn't had the previous conditions to compare to.

I agree with all of them. You've really spoiled your helper. I really think you have no other choice but to let her go. It's not only the additional work that she's complaining to, it's also because you will be there at home. You will be able to check what she's doing and will easily spot her faults. Also, you hired a helper to do all the houseworks and child care, and she wouldn't have signed the contract in the first place if it's not ok with her, so why should she complain?

mel, you have to show her who is the boss. this is not being bossy, but she has to know that she cannot manipulate you like that. you have been spoiling her and now she is telling you how to do things, not the other way round. i suggest you get her to sit down and have a serious talk with her, tell her this is how things are going to be, like it or not. if she doens't like it, let her go. it's not worth it. find out early so that you will still have time to find a new helper in case she go. since you will be staying home with her, she's not going to look after the kids on her own, you will be there. there are helpers out there who look after 2 or more kids and still have to do the housework. she is very lucky to have you. dont let her get her way, mel. otherwise she will ask for even more in time to come.

She has come to me this morning to let me know that she will not renew a new contract. But it get complicated for me, she wants to stay until the end of her contract which is until november 18. We bought her return ticket early this week she was going back for nearly a month (she saved her public holiday to do this) so we planned to leave on our holiday the same time. We paid for the processing of her renewal contract right down to her passport size photo and transportation. She said it will take a few days to process so I suggested she use one of her public holiday day to take off (she is upset !!). Now she wants to come back from her leave stay until she finds another contract or until her contract comes to an end. I want her to go on 10th, she said that if I release her now she can't come back and look for a job, but I can't see myself working with her either. My daughter has grown close to her and I was thinking 3 weeks away will help to forget. She even has asked me to help place an ad in Asiaxpat. I hate to take away a chance for her to make a living but don't really want her to live with me too. I guess I feel a bit betrayed. Just blowing stem thanks 4 the replies .

Well, just tell her the truth. That you have already arranged for your holiday and that that cannot be changed anymore. She now wants to stay with you longer because 1. She will not be allowed by the immigration department to look for a jobe here in HK if she has not finished her contract and 2. She will have to pay for her accommodation, food, etc once she leaves your house and 3. She will only be allowed by the immigration to stay for another 14 days once she leaves your premises. You will need time for your daughter to forget her. She might tell your daughter that mom wants me to go. Resentment might arise. Whatever your decision is, don't forget to inform the immigration department that you have terminated the employment contract as well as a copy of the written letter you gave to her. If not, whatever happen to her, that will be your obligation. Make a copy of the air ticket and have her sign that she has received it. Also, those of her unpaid salaries. You may fax the letter to the immigration department at fax no. 2157 9181. You may also take this time to look for new helpers and make sure that next time, you don't spoil your new helper again. If you need an agent, you may call my friend Mary at 6283 7299. She might be able to help you. Hope that helps and Good Luck!

She wants a reference letter, we decided that she will finish her contract (this weekend)and go . She wrote her own and explains how she was excellent, we said we would not sign that now she said I owe her one because she's worked for us for 2 years and told me to write one out.

you dont owe her anything. you dont have to write a reference letter if you dont want to. she can't make you.