DH Spoiled and No Common Sense



ORIGINAL POST
Posted by Diego 18 yrs ago
The problem is that they all do this: crying when making things clear.


Changing her would not change much. You cannot expect them to be perfect, if they were smart & perfect, they would not be helpers.


To my experience, even a higher salary maid would not make a difference...

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COMMENTS
red82 18 yrs ago
I guess Diego is not a helper but does that make him perfect? I guess not. To add, most DH from Philippines are University graduates, they come to HK due to lack of opportunity/money in the country. Also for the higher salary, you give someone a high salary when you think that person deserves it. It is the same as when you purchase brand name products. You pay for quality.


Ghetfabbty, kids has to go through changes. If you are not happy with your maid, change her quickly before your son gets MORE attached. I believe it is better for him to recover now than leave it until later. Dont you think?


In hiring a new one, check her educational background. For me, I used to be a nanny and soon to be working as one, educational background is higher than experience. I'll PM you universities from the Philippines that suggests good mental capability, possible high IQ/EQ and common sense. In the Philippines, we are 85% by population equipped to do household chores.

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SeeYen 18 yrs ago
If you feel your helper is not an 'asset' but a 'liability', change her. It's so frustrating to pay for no quality work and yes, I too hate it when they cry 'cause then you feel like you are the bad one and being mean. At times, I wonder if they are 'trained' to do.


I have a helper who has worked 4 years in Singapore and 8 years in HK(both employement with the same employers) so I thought she would be a great asset to my family when came recommended by another helper whom I know but after less than 6 months in the job, I find that

I constantly have to raise my voice 'cause she repeatedly does the stupid things that I've asked her not to again and again, as if she's deaf and cannot understand what I'm saying. I've done all I could (showing her pictures, demonstrating it, writing it down in both English and Chinese...etc) and yet still no improvement. It's such a emotional torture for me and I'm sure to a certain extend for her as well that I've decided to terminate the contract earlier.


We don't need this kind of stress in life...as if we already not have enough.

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miming 18 yrs ago
Well said banja!

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cd 18 yrs ago
To Banja,

whether the helper has a degree or not is irrelevant, they were hired to be a domestic helper, and if they cannot do that job to the standard expected of them, then the employer is quite within their rights to moan, give a verbal warning, then a written warning, then the sack, the same as in any other job.

Its not laziness that leads many people to get a domestic helper, its because theyu either work or want to be able to spend more quality time with their children rather than shouting at them all the time because they are so tired from cooking, cleaning, ironing etc. If you had a 3 year old, would you rather be at the beach digging sandcastles with them, or at home tackling a huge pile of ironing, and which one do you think the child would prefer?

To the original poster, if your helper wants to eat food that you normally don't buy then tell her to buy it herself, or give her the basics, then a food allowance for the rest, or give her a food allowance for everything. We give our helper $500 a month.

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miming 18 yrs ago
Since you guys both from the same country,it should be more friendly household atmosphere.You talk to her nicely then sure there wont be any tears flooding.

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SeeYen 18 yrs ago
Banja, if reading DH threads often get your blood boiling, then simply just DON'T READ. Have you ever dealt with a DH to start with?

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Nacha 18 yrs ago
Hi Ghetffabty, I read your post and it really sounds like mine!!! I must say I've been trying to ignore problems between me and my helper as by the time these things happened I were pregnant second child and my first child is only one year old who still needs attention. Now the contract will be finished by April and I don't want to bother about it. But may I suggest..if I weren't pregnant, I'd terminate the contract and give a chance for a new one. I'd absolutely NOT let myself mentally suffered by my helper. It's not worth at all.

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