DH Staying Out on Saturday Night???



ORIGINAL POST
Posted by FKKC 17 yrs ago
I understand from various threads here, some employers let their helpers stay out overnight on their 24 hours of rest. Their familes are not in HK so where do they go to stay? I know they are adults and there are some rare cases which are acceptable but on the whole - shouldn't we be concerned?



This question is just out of curiosity, and to be equip with some knowledge of this topic in case in future, my DH may ask for this privilege of which I've never en-counter in the past.

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COMMENTS
FKKC 17 yrs ago
Another question, if a DH is allowed to stay out the night by the employer and some un-predicted accidents occurred, does the liability goes to the employer or is it covered by the insurance as the helper is not working at that time?

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cd 17 yrs ago
Actually many of them do have families here, my helper has both parenst, an ex wife and an aunt working here. Many have sisters. He stays out at least 1 night a week usually 2, sat and sun. My old helper used to stay with friends either in their houses or boarding houses on all the bank holidays.

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evildeeds 17 yrs ago
Actually in law no you cannot. Simply because they are allowed 24 hours rest and that is their own time to do what they like to do. Most helpers would stay though if asked as they would be afraid of losing their jobs. Many prefer to stay at home as well.

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Moppet 17 yrs ago
Agree with evildeeds also maybe think about the relationship yopu want with your helper. If they wish to stay out and you say no how can you then expect them to go above and beyond for you if you need extra help from them anytime. If a helper asks to stay out it means they want too and if they don't because you don't wish them too they will feel resentment.

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Moppet 17 yrs ago
Moobsy who the heck do you think you are?????? you don't own your helper and if she wants to go to Wanchai and have a good time that's up too her not YOU. I'm surprised you can keep a helper at all if you have that sort of attitude towards them (mind you going by your other post you've had terrible trouble with disgruntled employees in the past so....) and i would imagine it is only because many of the women who work as helpers are desperate to earn money for familly back home so put up with almost anything from employers.

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evildeeds 17 yrs ago
Moppet, that is true. I wonder how Moobsy or anyone else would react if their employers told them they must be home by a certain time when they are not at work. They would tell them to run and jump. What people do in their spare time is up to them, you have to trust your employees whatever you do. Maybe some here are judging by what they would do themselves.

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Moppet 17 yrs ago
From the helper wants to leave but owes money thread Moobsy

Doesn't sound like they where just so happy after all.




If you have young children in the apartment then please let her go - today!!!.


As you have already advanced her a few months salary you will not have to pay anything for letting her go. Write a leter & get her to sign it agreeing that she has been paid & she resigned.




We have had terrible experience in the past with disgruntled helpers taking things out (physically) on our babies. We have learnt that if they are not wanting to work, then get them out immediately (1 hour notice with you watching every move).


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Moppet 17 yrs ago
My point is your saying one thing on one thread and another in this one so frankly it's hard to believe anything you've said at all.


I hope my point is now clear



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evildeeds 17 yrs ago
""Wait until your helper comes to you saying she has an STD, lice, or worse & see how happy you are to have her looking after your toddlers. wait until you have a pregnant helper & YOU have to serve her until the baby is born (and you pay her for the priviledge) and see how happy you are. Wait until the debt collectors start calling the house as she is living the good life & borrowing to pay for it, and see how happy you are. Wait until your helper has to tell you she has HIV, and see how happy you are!""


So as an employer bound by rules in HK I am expected to bend rules at home but not in the office. Same labour laws. How does that work? What would happen if I placed these rules on my workers at the office? No going out, no getting pregnant while you work for me......or else. If you get HIV, or and STD you are out the door? As I mentioned in the other thread it's either treat like an employee or treat them as a child.

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FKKC 17 yrs ago
That's what I am concerned about - "as the helper is living in the employer's home" not elsewhere and as a family living under one roof, one should be comforted that everyone is home safe & sound for the night no matter if they are the parents, the children, the grand-parents, helpers or even staying guests.


I guess there could be exceptional cases but that should be discussed and agreed upon.

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evildeeds 17 yrs ago
But there is a difference - those employees that worked for you in the office do not live in your home but the helper does.


And what difference does that make? My days are 3/4 work and 1/4 home. So I spend more time with the people in the office meaning I am more at risk in my office! Times that by 50 people and it looks like I really should revisit my life insurance! Ohhh I can feel it now........it's getting me..........those party animals here.....their bouts of drinking every nights during the week in Wan Chai and LKF..........the meanlingless copulation.......the pregnant women.........ahhhhh why did I ever treat them like adults........


Nah, bit of an exaggeration! But to be honest if I want to employ someone I treat as a child then I would employ a child, which again would be against HK rules.......but I forgot, in the home we are not bound by rules are we? Forgot that, thanks......

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FKKC 17 yrs ago
Transhk21


I second this

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Moppet 17 yrs ago
many people work with with Children, i did all my working life both as a live in Nanny and a live out but that didn't mean my employer could treat me like a piece of property and decide my every move. If you deem it necessary to have someone living in your home then you make dam sure it's someone you can trust 110% or how could you possible leave said children with them. Surely it follows these same people we entrust our children too are able to stay out after 9.00pm without permission or it meaning they are prostitute's or up to no good.

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evildeeds 17 yrs ago
OK Transhk, seems you do not seem to understand the concept.


At work you are an adult and you work with / employ other adults. Agreed? Now at home you are an adult and you employ an adult. Agreed? How hard is that?!!


So your argument is that DH should not be trusted to go out on a Saturday night because she works with children. NOW lets move on. If this is your argument then we should also place all teachers, social workers, etc, etc in the same category. Teachers especially as they are in control of how many kids in a classroom? This is your argument, right?


So yes there are some of us wasting our breaths as I have not yet heard one compelling justification, only hearsay on what all of our DH's would get up to on a Saturday night out. Trust me it's nowhere near what your child school teachers get up to!!

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evildeeds 17 yrs ago
Peggy - not a huge difference. Actually you can add nurses to that equation as well, including those who work on children's wards. Working with children is working with children however you want to cut and dissect it.


Transhk - that is your situation and if it works then that's fine. Someone asked about the law and that's what my replies were based on. As mentioned elsewhere my own helper stays at home every night, that's her choice and preference. I gave her the option though.

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Moppet 17 yrs ago
Why is a nany and helper different? i lived in someone else home and looked after there children please explain

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annebin 17 yrs ago
"..BUT, my helper will still get home before 9pm on Sunday, will not grow her hair long, will abide by my rules & will be OK with it.."


- why can't your helper grow her hair long???

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BumpyDog 17 yrs ago
I was also amazed by that statement. I simply cannot imagine my employer telling me to cut my hair. Nor can I imagine obeying such a command!


It's scary what a little bit of power does to some people.

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evildeeds 17 yrs ago
Transhk - I think the fact that all FDH (Not just Filipino / Thai) are unable to gain PR after 7 years here is absolutely disgraceful. I think the fact they are unable to use the e-Channel at the border is disgraceful. They probably contribute more to HK that a high percentage of others with residency or PR. It's a subject I've discussed at length with both certain members of the HK Civic Party and Liberal Party. I have also supported and attended an event highlighting domestic abuse of FDH a couple of years ago - funny how that wasn't carried in the local papers - wonder why? (I know why, some of the abuse here in HK may make people start to care about the plight of those they feel below them and we can't have that can we?)


I hope this answers your question. Please feel free to ask any others.

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BumpyDog 17 yrs ago
Good question, Transhk21.


I don't think there is good answer to it, however. It appears that racism is legislated for in Hong Kong.


What do you think the answer is?


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evildeeds 17 yrs ago
It is racism, as are the comments above that seem to assume that only FDH are susceptible to STD's, HIV and pregnancy above.

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Moppet 17 yrs ago
Peggie wong


I guess you'd be wrong in your assumption then, i worked as a live in Nanny for three different Families and also looked after there rooms, clothes, bathrooms laundry etc etc. Many many Helpers look after the children also so that' argument doesn't wash i'm afraid.

I also lived at the opposite end of the country to where i worked so no i did not go home on my day off i lived with the familly 24 / 7 the same as a DH does. There are also many nannies working overseas the same as a Helper.

The only real difference between a Nanny and a hleper is with a helper they are expected to care for the kids and do all the chores where general cleaning would not be done by the nanny other than what was stated above and they would have experience and qualifications to care for kids.


However none of this explains why being a helper means you can be told what to do and how to spend your free time and as a nanny your wouldn't be.

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evildeeds 17 yrs ago
Transhk - I don't think this comment that was made in the way you read it:-


""Wait until your helper comes to you saying she has an STD, lice, or worse & see how happy you are to have her looking after your toddlers. wait until you have a pregnant helper & YOU have to serve her until the baby is born (and you pay her for the priviledge) and see how happy you are. Wait until the debt collectors start calling the house as she is living the good life & borrowing to pay for it, and see how happy you are. Wait until your helper has to tell you she has HIV, and see how happy you are!""


This to me is implying that this is exactly what will happen if we let FDH have a night out of the house. To me this statement is a hugely stereotypical.


And making point about individual helpers is not indicative of the population as a whole, I fail to understand how 1 person in nearly 300,000 represents the whole FDH situation as a whole. But as I can read on here in many cases sadly it does.



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Apennyforum 17 yrs ago
IMHO, this thread has gone from a perfectly good question from an employer to a silly argument about how dh's spend their free time.


i have been both worked as dh and now as a nanny here in hk. it is VERY different from each other. simple case in point dh are expected to do everything around the house. ie chores,shopping,petcare and yes of course taking careof the kids. whereas a nanny is only responsible for the kids, and housework is secondary and/or not a part of being a nanny.


and there a marginal difference as to the treatment of peolpe who do both jobs. nannies usually get better pay than dhs.


as for free time please. we are all adults and can take care of ourselves. yes some have made mistakes but its very unfair to judge a whole community by a few people.


i guess its only fair that what us nannies and dh do in our free time is our business. and no we dont whore around as one poster said. its is merely one employee asking for a bit of a break from her work. it is not easy working and living with your employers on top of being away from you home country.

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Moppet 17 yrs ago
Peggie


I certainly do and it's to treat my helper how i would like to be treated myself, with respect and fairness not like i own her.

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Chewinthefat 17 yrs ago
Hmmmm? Having read through this entire thread, ive noticed some rational responses, sanctimonious responses, righteous responses and down right naïve responses.


To me, and hopefully many others, the bottom line is very, very simple.


The fact is that any employee, regardless of who they work for, may do as they please with their free time, period. Be you a CEO, a Doctor or a FDH. What you do with your free time is entirely up to you.


Our helpers are not children, they are not our property and it is certainly not our position to treat them as such. Yes, of course, we can all tell horror stories concerning helpers, but the same can be said of all occupations. Just because one helper did this or one banker did that, doesn’t mean we should treat all helpers and all bankers the same.


The point is we are talking about civil liberties here. That said, it should simply be the decision of the employee or individual to wave his or her rights regarding the right to free movement, should they choose to do so, and not for the employer to enforce self-styled restriction upon them.


Remember, what they do in their free time is none of our/your business. IMHO we should endeavour to afford our helpers the same rights as we fiercely uphold for ourselves.


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Thames 17 yrs ago
Moobsy, wait until your children come home from school with the dreaded lice - and pass them on to your poor helper.

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kittycat2 17 yrs ago
To MisterD - your point about visa is wrong. Someone does NOT need to be on a working visa for 7 years to get PR status. I arrived here on an employment visa - but my husband, for example, could be here for 7 years doing nothing all day except watching tv and drinking beer - at the end of 7 years he will get PR status simply because he has been 'ordinarily resident' in HK for 7 years. That is the rule. As this doesn't apply to helpers, and as DH visas are only granted for certain nationalities, then of course the rules by definition are racist.


And as for these ridiculous employers who suggest that their children are at risk from long-haired helpers who might catch lice if they are allowed out... I wonder how many of them send (or will send) their kids to tutorial schools or the like? Do you know how convicted child molesters and their ilk are prevented from working with children in HK? They aren't. Every month there is a story or two in the papers of private tutors, piano teachers, school teachers even, who have been charged with child sex offences, and then after conviction it generally comes out that it isn't not the first time...just bear that in mind.

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BumpyDog 17 yrs ago
MisterD, interesting that you feel domesitc helpers enjoy such great privileges. what about the fact that they have to pay a monthly "levy" out of their salaries which is effectively a tax whilst no other HK residents on such a low income are subject to tax.


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evildeeds 17 yrs ago
Transhk - this was originally money that went to the helper. Back in 2003 they cut the helper salaries by $400 a month and this had to be paid by the employer to the government retraining fund. So this is indeed money that has come from the helpers, us employers always paid it! And what's happened with that government training fund.............F.A.

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winter2 17 yrs ago
my helper goes out at 4pm on sat, and she returns sunday nights past 11pm. i didn't need her help during those times, but yet it will be nice to have someone around to help with the weekend chores. however, we have an mutual understanding that if something out of the ordinary arises, she will stay in. I was under the impression if anything happens to her during her"stay-out" period, her insurance will cover it. am i wrong?


maybe i am too lenient on this; but I thought it will be nice for her to have some 'fresh air' outside. however i hope this will not backfire on me. she told me she is not into any hanky panky business, and i trusted her. am i taken for a ride here?

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Moppet 17 yrs ago
I would agree with cara if things are fine then why look for problems, after all it would just be a case of her working a bit later on the saturday as Sunday is her day off anyway and she's with you all day Saturday until 4.00pm you could of course request she works till 7.00 0r 8.00 saturday if need be but i think it's quite healthy for everyone to have a little break from each other.

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mrsl 17 yrs ago
Winter2, sounds as if you have an excellent helper.


If you cannot trust your helper to act responsibly, then you are employing the wrong helper. Once you know that your helper is safe (e.g. that she lets you know when she will be atying out overnight and you have some friends numbers etc. if she does not come back on Sunday night/Monday morning), then what is the problem? The whole curfew thing is amazing; it is illegal, there are no two ways around it. Every helper is entitled to at least 24 hours continuous leave every week, there is no exemption for 'the protection of your family'. If you think that your helper's behaviour could endanger your family, then you need to make some changes rather than imprisoning him/her. Surely, it's nice to have some time apart for all concerned?

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specks 17 yrs ago
I do roughly the same as winter2. I will let my helper know as early as possible if we need her to stay on a Saturday night, but more often than not, we aren't doing anything, so as far as I'm concerned, she can finish up in the afternoon.


I always give her an option of staying out overnight and returning on the Sunday evening by 10pm, but always reassure her whislt she is employed bys us, this is where she lives and she is not to think she can't come home on a Saturday night just because she is free to go out. Last week she stayed home to look after our child whilst my husband and I went out for a rare evening dinner and our helper was happy to stay in.


I have to say after reading this thread and being rather new to the helper employment boat, I feel somwhat uneasy. I hear all these horror stories and it's makes one feel very concerned. But so far (touch wood!) we seem to have found a great helper, who is professional, committed and eager to learn (especially western cooking). I sat down from the beginning and assured her that if she is good & loyal to us, we in return will be loyal an good to her.


Even shen she gets in at 10pm on a Sunday night, if we are still up watching tv, she will ask if we need anything before she retires for the night. Now she doesn't have to do this and we have not asked her to do so and that makes me feel like there is a good open line of communication.


I have found it very difficult to "let go" of things at home over to our helper and this is purely an independent thing, having looked after myself & my family without help. My helper has also found it difficult I'm sure because she is used to doing EVERYTHING coming from a chinese family. Together we are working through it and I have found that yes I treat her like an employee not a friend, but with the respect that I would treat any person in my life. She is a human being and deserves to have a life outside her workplace just like anyone else. She finishes each night around 8pm. One night I had to ask her something and knocked on her door and she was ironing at 9pm at night! I told her that as far as I'm concerned, unless there is something urgent we require (which is never!), when the kitchen is cleaned, she is to consider her day finished. Ironing can wait, I do not feel comfortable having someone working into the wee hours just because that is what she did at her last place. Having said that, if she was a slacker during the day and didn't get things done because of tardiness then I would deal with the matter another way, but everything is done perfectly every single day.


In the back of my mind I am waiting for the 3 month probation period to see if it all goes to pot. BUT, I am cautiously optimistic though!


These helpers work hard & long hours for little money, they are human beings and deserve the same respect we would give anyone else. I believe you treat someone well, then it comes back tenfold.



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Moppet 17 yrs ago
Good on ya Specks i couldn't agree more

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specks 17 yrs ago
You know what? I have been reading this thread since it started and have not provided my input for the pure simple reason that you are damned if you do damned if you don't. Seriously Peggy, get over it and stop thinking that I am being racist. As for the petty "c" in Chinese, sorry if you are offended, but if you reread through my thread you will see that there are typo's all the way through the thing!


And not for ONE MINUTE am I saying that all Chinese treat their helper badly. I have Chinese friends and i know they treat their helper well. I am simply going by what I have seen for myself and what has been told to me by helpers.


As for the comment on looking after my children, I have one child at present with another on the way and to this day my helper has not once bathed her or done the actual motherly things, other than cook her dinner. She has been taking her to school in the morning because I suffered terribly from morning sickness. I pick up my child each afternoon from school. I don't feel comfortable that my helper manages our house and also expected to look after our child, I had my child for myself and my husband, for no one else. Yes she babysat for us last week for the 1ST time and I daresay she will more hands on after the baby is born, but that is because I don't have my mum and friends and family around the corner over here in HK. My helper is basically finished all her chores easily in time each day and I have said to her not to stress if there is nothing else to do, to have a break. When The evening I found her ironing, it was her first week with us and obviously she was still finding her way around things and the routine, not to mention probably wanting to do the right thing. So I nipped it in the bud about the ironing. Why I feel the need to justify is beyond me, maybe I'm feeling attacked now that you could maybe think that I am some rich wife of an expat (I WISH!!)


Previous to having a full time helper, I had a part-timer for over 9 months, so i am aware of what is to happen. I also know a wonderful helper who has been with her Chinese family for 18 years. Please, pleasd don't try to read into what is not there.


I try not to listen to the horrible stories, but it's hard not to when it is heard all the time, hence the reason it had taken us so long to hire a full-time helper. I commend cara for starting a thread on how wonderful their helper is and the positive reinforcement it must give helpers, because they do read these threads and it must be so degrading and disheartening to hear employers writing what are sometimes petty things. No wonder some of these womean have no confidence or low moral.


I never at one point said it is confined to ONLY Chinese employers, but I only know from exactly what you suggested, and that is hearsay I guess and the occasional way I see employers & their children speak to their helper. For the record I live in a complex with predominantly Chinese community, there is only another 3 expats families living here that I am aware of, so I am by no means "sheltered" within the expat community.

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mrsl 17 yrs ago
Specks, these threads always seem to degenerate into 'if you don't agree with everything that I believe, you are a bad parent/employer or whatever'. Being accused of racism because of a typo is a new one. I try not to rise to the bait, but some of the patronising, judgemental and extremely rude comments are often difficult to let pass.


It sounds as if you have a superb helper. Apart from cara's thread and one or two others, very few of us (myself included) are decent enough to list the good helpers' qualities and only come for advice on problem resolution. I wouldn't worry about problems until they arise. Continue to be optimistic and congratulate yourself on good interviewing.


I would agree with Peggie Wong on one point. I've interviewed a few helpers who played the 'my Chinese employer treats me so badly card'. Although some have valid concerns, others use it as a way to seek employment without a reference. I have some western friends who fell for that one and quickly realised that the problem was the helper rather than the employer. There are plenty of expat employers who expect their helpers to be superhuman just because they pay them above the minimum (teachers, nannies, cleaners and cordon bleu chefs all rolled into one). I have learned a lot from Chinese friends about keeping a professional employer/employee relationship with my helper.

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specks 17 yrs ago
thanks mrsl. I wasn't trying to stir things up, it's just how I see it since living over here and yes, it is frustrating when things are taken out of context.


I think i must be one of the the fortunate ones to have landed a good helper. At the interviews, when they started asking questions like how big is your apartment, and generally commenting negatively about their employer, I struck them of the list immediately. When my helper said to me at the interview what hours she currently worked (6am -11.30pm!) each day and slept in the children's bedroom, I was shocked and said as much. She was quick to say that her employer was very good and treated her very well. So as far as I was concerned, that sealed the deal. My priorities on my list was someone who could cook western and who had experience with babies. My helper did not have either of these on her cv and she was very open about. I went with my gut and it has paid off.


She is a fantastic cook and loves trying new recipes and I know she will be great with the new bub.


This helper business has been a completely new experience for me having grown up in Australia, so of course naturally we are shocked when we see/hear what goes on.


For the record, when I told one of my Chinese friends I have finally sucumbed to the full-time helper, she was quick to say, do not become friends with them and buy a safe because you can't trust them. I told her that is was a bit harsh and we need to be able to trust them. Her comment was well you can't and just be very careful. I then asked her why does she have one and is she happy with her. Her answer was because our life is easier, she looks after our house and kids, but we change our helper every 2 years, because that is when they slacken and start to feel too comfortable. I think that is sad.

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FKKC 17 yrs ago
cara


what is your point?


I think you should start another thread on this new issue of yours.

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winter2 17 yrs ago
i trusted my helper to let her go out at 4pm on sat, and return very late on sundays - way after some of the "curfews" noted in this forum. but reading all this horror stories, I had no choice but to wonder if i am doing the right thing.


all i like to know is if something happens, will her insurance covers that?


normally, i won't comment on these threads, coz it like damn if you do, and damn if you don't.


by the way, i also heard many stories about "my chinese/local employers" are so bad...all i have to say is you better get the whole story..and sometimes, you will be very surprised. getting references is the best bet.


by the way i am a chinese employer

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specks 17 yrs ago
couldn't agree more winter2 on the reference advice. However, what do you do when you have interviewed at least 20 women (through a reputable agency) and references are not provided.


Out of nearly 20 interviewed, 2 women produced references, one a letter and the 2nd a phone number to call. when I asked the agency manager about obtaining letters or numbers, I was told (and I am quoting here everyone, so please don't think I am being racist!!!) "it is very rare for a chinese employer to give a reference, it's just not the done thing over here". I then asked if she could contact the employer and I was told no, the agency do not do that. So what do I do, where do I go.


One friend of mine employed a helper, with reference which is great. Fantastic, she was put on, only to find out that the helper had lied and the reference was dodgy. So what do we do? I needed to make a decision out of 20 or so women, one reference was from a chinese family and other other American.


At the end of the day FKKC (I apologise as the thread has digressed somewhat from your original question), the call is yours. If you are happy and have a good working relationship with your helper, then only you what is best for you and just go with your gut instincts. Oh and be open and honest with her from the get go, and hopefully you will have a positive experience. Good luck!

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FKKC 17 yrs ago
specks


Since you realized that, why don't you start another thread like cara did which was the right thing to do - guess not as you claimed that you are NOT 'trying to stir things up'.

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specks 17 yrs ago
You originally asked for advice, which was provided by many people FKKC and it was not just me that digressed from the original thread. However I did apologise and put an end to my comments, hence the good luck to you.


I don't understand why people are so touchy and get offended so easily over here, I have never had such difficulties in all my years of travelling and living abroad.

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aidanmama 17 yrs ago
Well, I haven't read all of the replies but I need to give my helper time off. I need her to take a Saturday night off so I can get some rest. I hope she is mature enough to know what she's doing when she is off out. I am greatful for her help etc. but I am just not the 'helper' type. The majority i have had just cause so many headaches for me. Anyway.....

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evildeeds 17 yrs ago
Here we go again, taking 1 example and applying it to 300,000+ people! If you cannot trust the person you employ then simply don't employ them!

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Chewinthefat 17 yrs ago
Thank you evildeeds! It never ceases to amaze me when people state one isolated or specific incident and hold the whole world equally accountable.



Blatant et al, Here’s a story for you.


A friend of mine came over from the UK on a 3 month secondment. He works in finance in London.


Needless to say it was his first placement in Asia and he was unaware of the relative ease, shall we say, that exist here of obtaining a sexual partner.



Anyway, to cut a long story short, he got involved with the Hong Kong hooker scene and would frequently treat himself to a ‘pretty young thing’ most nights after work.


Well, eventually his secondement finished and off he went back to Blighty, promptly falling back into his normal suburban life with his wife and kids.


However, unfortunately he had picked up an STD and promptly passed it on to his wife. His little secret was soon exposed and inevitably led to a costly and emotional divorce.


Now, I would imagine that that little story is not the first of its kind but I am interested in what Blatant, Transhk21 and Moobsy have to say about the matter.


And how do they suggest we deal with bankers per se in the future?


What do you reckon, shall we all grab a plaque and head down the airport to demonstrate the arrival of any more bankers? ‘All bankers out of Hong Kong now!’ No more financiers, you just cant trust em!!’ or maybe even ‘Down with finance it's a den of iniquity’.


What do you reckon blatant et al, which plaque do you want to brandish and which group shall we condemn next (because we heard a one off story)?


Hmmm? I think the rest of us would simply say to ourselves ‘silly bugger, he can only blame himself’, and leave it at that. However, i feel certain other parties here may have a other thoughts.


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enoughalready 16 yrs ago
ALL the bankers I employ must be home by 9pm on weekends and keep their hair short. So far, touch wood, they are all very well behaved and stay out of trouble.

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Nutmeg 16 yrs ago
Good one enoughalready!

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BiteYouInUrNeck 16 yrs ago
How about anyone who employs a DH donates HKD 100 and we'll have tens of million if not hundreds. Then we hire dozens of 747 or A380, send them all home and tuck them in bed, give them a few soothing strokes on the forehead and go "darling, don't ever come back, HK is an evil place and you will slip."


9 million Filipinos earn less than USD 1 per day.


I'm not saying the under-privileged should be exploited, but that's how capitalism works. Spending minimal resources to get the best return. DHs simply have no bargaining power. If they truly feel bad working here, I really suggest them to go home and drag down their totally rotten government and build a better country.


Venting out anger is absolutely alright, we all need it once in a while. But if DHs really think they’re being ripped off, the resentment will build up gradually and trigger more employer-employee disputes. (Which is no good to any one of us!)


BTW, if any other major cities have a foreign working force made up of a single race with a sheer number over 200,000 and invade their CBDs and many other major locations on any public holidays, see if they will be as tolerate as the HK residents are. ;)

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Ed 16 yrs ago
Re: Deleted Post.


Please follow our rules - no need to hurl insults if you disagree with a post.


Thanks

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evildeeds 16 yrs ago
What, you mean saying something is factually incorrect? Like "if any other major cities have a foreign working force made up of a single race with a sheer number over 200,000" - which as we know is incorrect and displays racist overtones, especially when read with the rest of the post. One of the reasons I come here is because of this sites perceived intolerance of racism. If you have now changed this tolerance please let us know.

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BiteYouInUrNeck 16 yrs ago
Evildeeds, I bet you misread what I said altogether. If HK residents are generally racists (or maybe you're only referring to me). Then, foreign workers would definitely be informed in a very explicit way. Like, government not allows them to work here anymore?


Talking about it is not racism. (I know it's a trend now, as long as a topic involves certain degree of ethnic content, you'll be called racist.) Please don't overuse the word. It'll not get you anywhere and it doesn't hurt me to any extent.


And right, it's not charity.

So when someone have already been remunerated for what they've done, how could one say his employers are treating him bad? Respect is always earned. It doesn't roll into anyone's pocket on the wheel of inevitability. If someone truly feels abused, he should really move on.


If any FDHs (or anyone indeed) are mistreated, they should report to the relevant authorities at once. Keeping one eye closed only encourages all sorts of abusive behaviours.


But then, I've heard from the newspaper on a regular basis that some FDHs put USED tampons in the soup, shaking infants back and fro vigorously, causing fracture to their limbs or even death, pissed in the dishes.......I can really see the resentment. Is that the right thing to do? Especially to the children?


Working abroad has never been easy for anyone. The FDHs however are working in someone's home. It's just the workplace for the FDHs, but that's HOME for their employers. That's their castles, the thresholds they need to defense at all costs. Every type of occupation has a different set of rules for its workers to comply with. Most CS reps need to work even the typhoon signal 8 is up! I've never heard a single complaint though. Even they do, they can quit.


Anyone being pointed by an AK47 at his head right now?

Take a break, get a life and welcome to the real capitalist world.

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evildeeds 16 yrs ago
Biteyouinyourwhatever, the thread is about helpers being able to stay out on Saturday night, one thing I mentioned in the post Ed deleted.


You have taken this into your own rant about how well helpers do because back in the Philippines they would earn so little. So what?


You've heard stories, read newspapers, etc. But then you rant on one side of the story, I see you didn't mention rape, beatings, underpay, working in more than one location, etc? You believe it is so easy to report this to the authorities, well the authorities here are not really that bothered to be honest and usually investigate these allegations reluctantly. They only speed up when news becomes public. Let's look at court cases here where an FDH and a local are up for similar offenses. More likely the local will get off and the FDH will be jailed.


Now you also mention the home. Yes it is a workplace for the FDH. Yes it is your home, BUT you are also an employer and have to take that responsibility. If you're emotional about it then don't employ someone. That's simple. And who cares if CS reps have to report to work in a T8, that's irrelevant.


Now you mentioned 200,000 of a single race which is simply untrue. FDH are made up of Philippinas, Indonesians, Thai, Indian and Sri Lankan as well as others of various origins. Several different races and ethnicities even in one national group. They congregate where they can on days off for several reasons, one being the lack of anywhere to go. Now if you want to do something, as it annoys you so much, get up and do something about it. Start a collection, provide them with somewhere to go so they do not annoy you so much. But as you said this is a capitalist world and this is just a result of the need for FDH here in HK.

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ldsllvn 16 yrs ago
$5k a months - I dont think it is very little money for Phillipines. I earned way, way less than that at my first job in Russia (and that;s with University degree!!) - I was on around Hk$3k pm - and you can live on it, no luxiries, and no overseas holidays but you can live on it, trust me.


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axptguy38 16 yrs ago
I'm going to agree with Idsllvn. 5k a month is real money in the Philippines.

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Ed 16 yrs ago
Acqaurius has been removed from further participation on this site. We have no tolerance for racist comments

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xmauix 16 yrs ago
good one Ed ;)

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stanleyDH 16 yrs ago
to moobsy


u sounded like your helpers are happy and healthy? how could you say that wait till your helper comes to you and say they have STD, lice or worse and see how happy you are..you're such a b****!!! why, are you sure that your helpers are healthy and happy with you way of rules? did u ever tested them for STD or any other tests just to make sure they are clean? and do u ever think that if they have either 1 of that they would come to you and tell you hey i have an STD? do u really think? helpers are poor but they are not stupid..


watch you mouth miss perfect


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apple79 16 yrs ago
way Im tired of reading, let me do a posting instead hahahihi


chinese new year is a consecutive days off, so if a helper asks an employer if she culd stay out during those days off then let her. Most probably she will stay in a boarding house. Come on, 100%Dh in here are adults thus they're held responsible for their personal things...


uhummm if I know those employers who set a curfew for their DHs want their DHs to go home earlier to do extra jobs in the house duh!? a day off is a day off come on!!!! it says 24 hours, that is if you're not stupid enough to understand what 24 hours is hahahihi, rude mood in here

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colinants 16 yrs ago
"Trust me it's nowhere near what your child school teachers get up to!!


Never a truer word was spoken! And so what, everyone is entitled to a little adult time off. Especially when you spend a large amount of your day with children.


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leightonhill 16 yrs ago
Anyone remember another thread of the same subject where one person said she was caught off guarded when her newly arrived maid ask to stay out saturday night with her sister? She agreed to it but became a bit unhappy as the helper started coming back late on Monday morning when help was most needed. Pls see the other thread I mistakenly created on same subject a few days ago. I interviewed someone with the most-dreamed-of cv but she was released after only 9 days(!!!!!) by an expat family because of "financial problem(???)". She's asking for staying out sat night with her sister. I wonder whether that's the same helper.

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