Posted by
demerzel
13 yrs ago
So, i was relly happy to have found a great helper with great recomandation. Unfortunately, i was in a bad shape when i first filled in her contract and put a wrong size room so the immigration didn't accept it. She had another appointment today, we had already modified the size of the room, signed over it and thought it was ok. But today she comes and says we did not sign the accnowledgment slip so the immigration canceled everything assuming we do not suport hiring her so she has found a new employer already. I am on holyday half the world away and my husband just got back yesterday. Her immigration appointment was today so as i was talking with my husband he just mentioned there was a problem so i asked him to call the immigration tomorrow and try to solve it, or go ini person as see what is the problem. But then she comes and says it is too late and it has aleady been canceled and she has found a new employer and is already settled. What am i to make of it? Who is at fault? And yes, i am trying to find someone to blame as i am really ally angry and upset. She is rerally a great helper and losing her is very upsetting. And on a separate note, although i know it's illegal she has lived in our house for the past 3 weeks. Do i kick her out now or wait until...?
Please support our advertisers:
Looking for someone to blame, hey? Take a look in the mirror.
Please support our advertisers:
Is there an acknowledgement slip on the appointment letter?, not sure about that!
I know we went along when invited by appt. with the papers they requested.
Did you ever see any written evidence from Immigration. re wrong size of room you first put down, and them cancelling the so called 2nd appt, or was it just your helpers word? Our first helper slept in a very tiny room,we had to buy a special tiny bed for it.
To me it sounds a bit 'fishy', I don't know whether you can check with Imm. to find out whether she has been telling the truth, but that doesn't really matter now, she has been staying at you place illegally and planned to look for other work, I think you may have been taken for a ride!
If she is still under your roof, then let her go immediately, as she isn't officially employed by you, and not supposed to be there anyway, you don't owe her anything at all, not even the bus fare to the new employer she found. Count yourself lucky she found what she thinks is greener pastures, because for you to put faith in her, and have it effectively thrown back-by her finding a new employer, you are better off without her.
If you look for another helper only take one on, that you can speak to the last employer personally, because written references are not worth the paper they are written on, and often fabricated by the helpers themselves. It makes me laugh when I see Helpers on our local forum, a lot looking for illegal part-time, write their own CV's in very poor English, saying they are honest. Good luck searching.
Please support our advertisers:
I did see a blue paper there but i was too busy to read it and didn't realize we need to sign it. The contract had the size of the room circled so we put a different size and signed next to it. Apart from that we gave her the guest room and moved her out of the tiny maids room. I am to blame for 90% of it as i am very unorganized, chaotic and with no attention for details person that i know. What bothers me is she didn't check before either, or if she checked she didn't ask us to sign but went ahead and found someone else before her previous visa expired. It's a hard lesson but i hope to learn from it.
Please support our advertisers:
I read the booklet from immigration and the contract when we first signed and left it at that, not that i didn't read anything. When she came home with the issue being the size of the room I just dealt with that and didn't go through the papers again to see if there was anything else.
And i never said i am immune to the blame. What disturbs me is that she had already made other plans, as if she knew she was going to get canceled with us. My husband was there so he could have easily signed, but if she had already found someone else it means she must have assumed there will be something wrong. It's the sequence of events that bothers me the most now, if she went to immigration with our contract and got refused she already had a new contract ready to put on the table. Unless she knew our wasn't good why did she have another one? And she has already left te house, husband said she was all packed and ready anyway
Please support our advertisers:
It surprises me that you question the sequence of events, as though you had no part to play in understanding the strict requirements and processes for immigration. Have you ever employed a DH before? You must understand that it is a very precise process and a helper who senses that her potential employer is absent minded or distant/disorganised about it is putting her ability to work in Hong Kong in great jeopardy. What if the shoe was on the other foot and you were applying for residency in Hong Kong, organising your children to come here etc and your employer was too busy to put in the attention required to ensure that your visa was properly processed. Imagine your concern and the great risk to you and your family. Of course, you would not be happy with that. It sounds exactly like what has happened with your helper. It is a very nerve wracking process for them. They can easily be forced to leave if you dont pay attention to the process and yet, you can remain and employ another helper easily. I'd suggest she sensed your absence/distractions and couldnt bear the stress.
Please support our advertisers:
The OP states, she is a little dizzy!, being a very busy person, but so are a lot of people and they still employ helpers.
Also she says she moved the albeit illegal helper out of the maids room and into a guest room, how many employers would do that? not many I would say. In my mind she wanted to make everything right for her future helper, which would have given a lot of prospective helpers extra security.
I really think this helper had some other job in the pipeline before she even took this kind ladies offer of a roof over her head in the form of the guest room.
Maybe the OP is not a nationality this helper prefered, as some FDH's will take jobs elsewhere for a reason a fickle as that, no matter how nice or slightly dizzy the employer is.
Please support our advertisers:
Susie thank you for being so nice but after having given it considerable thought it was mostly my fault and i can totally understand her fears and the way she acted that way. I probably seemed carreless and uninvolved and she didn't want to risk having the visa canceled and returned to the phillipines. As i said, i am unorganized as well but the last 2 months i have been brain dead. We just moved to HK, never had a DH before, we lived in a 1 bed hotel till we found an apartment and we are still surrounded by boxes as we haven't had a chance to get all the furniture we need. Plus we found HK to be very difficult to adapt to, having been totally spoiled by our previous posting, hard to move around with 2 kids and no car, all sorts. Add to that my usual lack of attention to detail and I did probably put her off.
Anyway, after a sleepless night and reading all your replies, for which i thank you, i have to calm down and get over it. The helper has told me she has a friend looking for work and will bring her around and assist with all the paperwork and accomodation so hopefully that will work out and she is just as great as the one i've lost.
Please support our advertisers:
Cara i never said anything about you being nasty, i really like your messages and i appreciated your point of view!
I hope you will answer again next time i have a problem as you have experience, both work and home, and i would probably need more advice in the future. And my husband could do with lots of work related advice anytime ;-)
Thank you
Please support our advertisers:
Cara you are a little harsh! And to be honest arrogant in your assumption it is easy to find either a great or good helper! why have you had 3 if you are such an amazing employee? I had a fabuous one for 4 years, had to leave thecountry thinking it was permanent but ended up back here 6 months later and got a new helper......it's been the opposite experience, same employer......two different helpers...two very different experiences. so no you can't blame this lady who is overseas for the helpers basically taking advantage of having a place to stay while securing the best deal for herself.
I do not trust helpers anymore, in general, I just today was meant to meet one who told me right up to 10 minutes before hand she would be there only to get a call saying she had another interview while I'm standing at the train station with my two kids in the hot sun waiting to meet her......so no I don't trust them, they don't act the way I expect someone interviewing for a job should act!
Please support our advertisers:
I think what Cara is trying to say here is that the automatic assumption is that the helper is to blame. In this case it is not. The helper most likely did not want to risk jeopardising her ENTIRE livliehood by allowing her visa to lapse due to a the disorganisation of someone else! Or, at minimum, face being yelled at by immigration staff for not having the right signature here or there (yes, it does happen!!). If the helper is percieved as being wrong, then the perception here is all wrong, and likely tainted by the negative experiences caused by some dishonest helpers.
Please support our advertisers:
with all due respect, Cara, a lot of your posts are quick to point the fingers at the employer, and then you'll go on to explain in detail how well you treat your helper. It's a little off putting. Because to be honest, employers post their problems/issues here to ask for other employers opinion, not to be judged.
Please support our advertisers:
You must be logged in to be able to reply.
Login now
Copy Link
Facebook
Gmail
Mail