an unusual case

I read here regularly about horror stories of maids not performing, stealing, cheating and being dishonest. How about dishonest employers!! I am currently hosting a young relative of my partner. She has just finished her 1st contract with a local family and does not want to renew because of their harsh treatment of her. She has told immigration and can stay 14 days to look for a new employer. She has registered with a few places and received several calls. The problem is that when the prospective employer talks to the old family they basically give a bad reference because they want her to re-sign and stay with them. This unfair treatment is is putting off employers and the lady will probably have to return to the Philippines soon. The annoying thing is she is the most courteous, meek and religous person I have met in a long time and I am sure would make a great maid for a more normal family. Not all maids are bad.

that is a bad situation.


There are always rotten folks on either side..

Freddy - I don't know how unusual it is. we have 2 dh friends of family that are experiencing similar situations and currently looking for good employers as a result.


One has very good references, as at least one partner in the relationship (the employing couple) puts in a good word for her, admitting that the other partner had very unrealistic expectations of a dh (and doesn't give as glowing of a recommendation); we have been happy to recommend the dh's assets to our searching friends.


We have another dh who's not as lucky as the only one speaking up IS the one whose expectations can't be matched. Bad news.


Finally, we also have a sweet, qualified and hardworking girl in the Philipines who's looking to come over but who is very afraid to work for a bad employer since her mother was LOCKED IN THE APARTMENT and had to escape to her consulate and then back home to her country; happy to say the woman is now employed elsewhere and doing well. The daughter works for a family member of ours and we will spread the word for her as well.


These are just a few of many, I'm sure. Obviously, it's hard to tell from an agency, classifieds, and even some interviews/references who's upfront and who's not (employer OR dh). Always good to get references from your friends, of course, and we've made it a practice to meet our favorite candidates at least twice to be sure we're getting a good picture. We've selected one now (in contract process at the moment) and will recommend the other runner-ups to friends.

Thanks for your note RiceT, at least I can tell her she is not the only one. We are on our own and do not neet a maid or we would sign her ourselves. I have asked her to sign up on here as well and are asking around for her.

WELL, why not sign her up, and not pay her (as she is just living with you), and then you can say you are her last employer and thus reference? Without lying..

Freddy - Perhaps some of the families interested in her will value you as a reference as well, particularly if you really know her and can at least vouch for her as a character reference. Character is half the battle! :)


Also, if you (or your partner?) work for a company that has expats coming in, you can put in a good word for her there too.

Thanks RiceT, we are doing our best with our friends and colleagues and at least one may be in a position to help but only in 2/3 months time. I have only directly known her recently but I get embarrassed when she calls me sir, goes to her room to read her bible when my partner and I are watching a movie and trys to wash up for us. I have to remind her she is our guest. As I said she is very meek and courteous and a tribute to her family upbringing. One thing a little against her in finding a western family is she does not much about western cooking as she has only worked for the one local family.


Life, I said before we do not need a maid and I will not risk my employment visa by falsely signing her even though she is a relative of my partner. As it happens I suggested it but my partner said no.

Freddy - If your friends need someone in 2/3 months, they can at least meet with her within her 14 day grace period; then when the time comes that they need someone, if they liked her, they can call her back. If she doesn't find someone in the grace period, she'll be going back home anyway; so maybe an interview or two (or more! :) now will help her chances of getting hired and brought back to HK. You know? Just a thought. Doing the same for the ones we know. I hope it all works out.

Oh, and as for the western cooking, yes, have seen that too with the DH's that have worked with "non-western" families. We've decided to train our DH in cooking and look forward to some Chinese and food from the Philipines! :)

RiceT,

thanks for your sugestions, hopefully something will work for her and good luck with your new maid