Just wondering, caught helper texting a few times when supposed to be watching children. The children (aged 2 and 3) were on the sofa and helper was in the kitchen texting. When would an employer say something?
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In my opinion, the same rules should apply as if you work in an office. Personal calls and texting are ok as long as they don't affect her work.
For example: on the phone while cooking or cleaning, fine. While helping a kid on the monkey bars, not fine.
In this case it sort of depends on the situation. If it is just a text that takes 20 seconds while the kids are playing, no big deal as long as it is just an occasional occurence. However why was she in the kitchen? Would it have been ok for her to have been in the kitchen if she wasn't texting? That is, did the kids need "eyes on" supervision or were they ok? At the end of the day though, she shoud have been watching the kids.
Have a chat with her and tell her you rely on her judgment. Her job is to watch the children. She should be focused on them and not texting. Also tell her you are ok with calling and texting when she is doing something that doesn't require her full attention.
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if the kids were safe and secure, i don't see a problem.
If they were in the bathtub, or running outside on the sidewalk, yes there should be something said, but to be honest, if YOU were at home with your kids and they were on the sofa, would you be in front of them at all times, with NO other distractions?
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Thanks for your constructive feedback axptguy38. I talked to our helper today and did say that I didn't have a problem with her using her phone if we're not at home, if I'm watching the kids or if she is on her own (I work twice a week and on the other days, I look after our kids). I think I was a bit concerned that they were sitting outside and she had shut the kitchen door and had her back turned so couldn't see what they were doing. Our son is at that stage where he climbs on furniture to reach for things so I was just a bit worried. Thought I would nip it in the bud and I think it's all good. : )
funhobby: I understand where you are coming from but I do actually watch our children all the time when they are alone outside in the front room as my son can climb very high to reach for things in just a few seconds. I would have actually have had less of a problem if she was texting whilst in the same room as them as that would have meant that she could have seen what they were up to.
Anyhow, she is usually very good with the children. I guess I just worry when I have to go to work.
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On a related note, I would ensure that everything in the room is child proofed. Attach book shelves to the wall; get all the cords organized and out of the way; get some gates to make sure the tykes can't "escape"...
We and our helper found this immensely helpful as we could leave the little ones for short periods without being worried. Also, our helper could cook and only look at them every now and then instead of having to constantly monitor.
This is of course not an excuse to "abandon" your kids in their pen. Just that some time alone is good for them and also makes the household run more smoothly. Make sure the helper understands she still needs to pay attention.
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sorry if i came across harshly...too many stories of helpers being treated like slaves (not that you do that of course)...certainly knowing now that the kitchen door was closed so she couldn't even see/hear them I would tell her to pay closer attention
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funhobby: That's fine, I know you meant well, I was just a little unclear in my first posting. Thank you for your advice. : )
axptguy38: I have tried a lot of the above points but my son still manages to pull out the dining chair, climb on the table and try to see if he is Superman as he leaps off. Just two-year-old things!
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Yeah I hear you about two year olds. They can be very creative when it comes to dangerous situations! :)
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Michele123- I fully understand your worry as a mother of young kids, poor you and working parents, can't trust the helpers because of different coulture . The DH have no experience caring kids because they leave them to parents or inlaws to work outside . axptguy38 and funhobby ,they are full time monitoring on the threads for DH .
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sunny day, just as an example, our DH has taken care of many children in her twenty year career. We often ask her for her opinion on these matters.
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sunny day- Our helper has children of her own and it's not a cultural thing. Just asking for an opiniion on what seemed reasonable. I trust that our helper is good with our children, I can see that. We are lucky to have found her. Just needed an opinion on whether to raise the issue or not.
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WWcC
13 yrs ago
Michelle123 - totally normal what your 2 year old kid does and great that he can explore all these ways of doing things.
What I actually found was good was to allow him (to a certain extent) to touch unimportant / non-dangerous things around the house and otherwise you / helper explain to him that certain things are not for children to touch or are dangerous - crouch down beside him and explain it and show him what he should not touch or play with etc etc. It really works rather than child proofing everything and putting everything up high or taking it away, in this case kids see it next time and want to explore. My kid is now 3 and honestly we could leave the room with a candle on the table and he would never touch it (althought I would always keep a watch but have never found him to do so). From day 1, I have never moved a single thing, photo frames, plants, chairs tables and always explained to him that this is not for him / children to touch and /or its dangerous or it may break etc. You may think a 2 yr old does not understand, in fact they understand quite well just needs a bit of time and patience with the children. Ask your helper to do the same and soon you will be surprised they will undersand what not to touch.
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Thanks WWcC, I will try that. He is understanding a lot more now. I will sure give it a go. : )
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