Posted by
kara23
17 yrs ago
My helper has been with us for almost 5 yrs. She has always been very good at housework and with the kids. When she came to work for us, my elder child was only 2 and now he is 7. But she has started to ignore me when I speak to her. Everytime i say anything, i have to ask her if she heard me. One time right before she went out for her day off, i was complaining about something and I didnt know that she walked out while I was talking! The next day I told her off and she had the nerve to tell me that she didnt know I was talking to her!! After every lecture, she will improve for 1 week and then go back to being disrespectful. The only reason why she is still with us is because she really plays with the kids well and takes good care of them when I am out. Her housework has deteriorated (I always find stained glasses/mugs in the cabinet) and shows no improvement even after I have pointed it out to her. Am I being too picky or has her "quality" expired?? She definitely doesnt treat me like her employer at all now!
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smsm
17 yrs ago
Its quiet amazing Kara23 but I am having the same problem with my helper who has been with last 4 years...have kept her mainly coz of kids but in a constant dilemma about the next step to take..
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smsm, i think that after 4-5 yrs, they get so comfortable with this lifestyle that they think they are part of the family. But I asked her would she walk away while her friend/family member was talking to her? I have told her that I will not warn her again, the next time she does something disrespectful, she will have to go. is that too mean of me, or is that reasonable enough? I mean, even if you work in an office, you would not be rude to your boss, right? and you are also given verbal warnings and then out you go! I have never raised my voice at her during her whole 5 yrs here.
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she definetly has not developed a hearing problem has she? if not, talk to her and if does not work, maybe it is time for you two to part your ways! Kids will be fine, dont worry about that - they have their parents!
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Thanks for all your advice! Actually I did everything Starlionblue mentioned and my DH obviously knows I am serious coz I have never had such a session with her before. I will give her another month to improve.
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It wouldn't surprise me if your helper WANTS to be terminated, so she can collect her long service payment. It's been known to happen.
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cd
17 yrs ago
I thought that if the helper is terminated they are no longer entitled to long service pay, only if they resign.
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No cd you still have to pay otherwise employers would fire there helpers all the time to avoid payment. If there has been some real gross misconduct then it may be different but not just when your no longer happy with her performance.
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Green Valleys,
I assumed she was following me to the bathroom to check out the situation which I was complaining about. There was no one else there except my baby, how could she had thought I was talking to my baby when I was addressing her. I actually went to her room to speak to her, she had her bag all ready to go out and she stood up and followed me out of her room. And wouldnt you think that she had to tell me she was going out ie "Madam, I am going out now" or "Is it ok if I go out now" or even a simple goodbye? I was just pissed that she thought she could come and go as she please, and the i was even angrier that she left while I was so obviously telling her something. My back was facing her because I wanted her to follow me to the bathroom.
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kara23,
As far as I knew most of the DH is looking forward to their long service payment especially if she work with you for more than 5 years. Terminating her could entitle her for such benefits refer to http://www.labour.gov.hk/eng/public/wcp/EOConciseGuide/chapter10.htm
Maybe she has been advised by her numerous friends to go easy with her work so that you may feel upset and let her go. Why not talk to her in adult way and explain about her long service pay. Money is always the best motivation. Filipina DH are forced to work abroad due to financial constrain. Offer her the best you can.
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cd
17 yrs ago
To Moppet, sorry you're right, they are entitled unless they're firef for serious misconduct. But kara23 she is only entitled to long service pay if she has completed 5 years, not just into the 5th year, I just checked on the website.
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I misread the first post and thought that your helper had already completed her fifth year. If she hasn't then she isn't entitled to long service pay (as mentioned already). In this case, it would be wise to have that heart-to-heart chat with your helper ASAP, because the last thing you want to do is terminate her after she's completed five years when you were really thinking about doing it now.
I am actually a bit surprised that she would "go slow" before she completed five years, so maybe she isn't doing it on purpose. Maybe she is just getting lax.
Either way, it's time to have a chat and maybe give her a shape up or get out notice.
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