Can I do this?

My new helper will arrive in mid-January.


There are three things that I feel strongly about:-


1. Asking for money.

My new helper has already hinted that she would like me to pay for her travel to Central on Sundays and has asked me to help her with the agents fees and then deduct from her monthly salary. I said "Yes" to both. Firstly because I know that she's got relatives in Central and from my place to Central is a long way for her and I've made it clear that I cannot afford anymore than the basic wage. Secondly I've agreed to lend her money for the agents fees because I heard she is already paying a lot in the Phillipines. I do not wish to be taken advantaged of and although she seems really, really sweet, can I make it a rule from the start that I am not on an expatriate salary and therefore, unless it is REALLY necessay (cutting into my savings) I will not be able to lend her? I just want to establish this from the beginning to avoid any misunderstanding. How do you say it?


2. She's worked for 10 years with her previous employer. She's had an excellent recommendation from her previous employer but I am a bit worried she could be too set in her ways and not flexible enough to adapt. Can I also mention my worry to her upfront and that I expect her to be flexible enough to adapt to my home?


3. Attitude. She is nice enough but I've heard so much about helpers who have been here for a long time who may not like to listen to advices/instructions and would retaliate, sulk etc. Can I tell her upfront that if she has made a mistake, that it is better to just apologise, smile and let it be (not to sulk or retaliate)? She's very pleasant and kind (per her previous employer) but I'm just wondering if I should lay down the rules.


I know the above sounds harsh but from what I've seen and heard, I really don't want to take any chances and would like to establish all these rules before she starts. Just wondering if such rules are reasonable to talk to her about (at the start) or would frighten her. No harm meant but just wanting to ensure things go smoothly.

STOP ! You do not pay for her fares into central, even if you live out near the border her salary is enough for the KCR to get into town. STOP! DO NOT LEND HER MONEY. She is lining you up as a SOFT TARGET. If she worked for 10 years for one employer she has enough time to save some money. You have to be firm now, otherwise the drain on your money will never end. Also, you NEVER discuss your own finances with your DH, it is none of her business.

Excellent advices from all - thank you.


I think I know what to do now. I cannot go back on my words in regards to her transport cost to Central but I will make it clear that no other financial help will be offered.


I haven't yet drawn up a loan agreement in regards to the agency fees. I will make sure I get that ready when she comes to work with me.


One more advice though.... with regards to salary payment, do you transfer directly into her bank or do you give it to her in cash and make her sign for it?

Salary - I transfer directly into HSBC through online banking and print out a copy of the transfer confirmation for records. You can also have her sign for it.


Regarding Transport- on another thread this was discussed and one idea was giving an Octopus card with 50 or 100 each month - and that's it. Up to her how she uses it.


Rules - yes, lay out the rules very clearly in the beginning in writing - I have a few pages that includes everythying from laundry to plant care.... Review with her, give her time to read, and then review again. Gently teach how you like things done the first few weeks.


Good luck, sounds like you are onthe right track - just be firm on your resolve as to how you want this employer-employee relationship to work.

I would not recommend an Octopus card. I did this with my helper: added $100 and told her that this ammount was for one month. She spent all the money in only one week and the rest of the month asked for more money saying that she did't have any left because she sent everything to the Phil. Next month I told her she could keep the card but I would give her money only when going on my errands.

And put it all in writing - I did this with my second and third helpers (not with the first, but I learnt), stating that we would not pay salary in advance (ie as a loan, as that is normally how it is presented), also that any personal problems that were likely to affect her work should be mentioned asap (to avoid tears and sick relative sob stories). I also put down what the housekeeping money could be spent on for her personal things (loo roll and soap, but not other toiletries). Good luck! And agree - don't give her an Octopus, work out the fare to Central (doesn't need to be the MTR if a bus is cheaper - transport is transport) - also I'd give it to her once a month and add it to the receipt for her salary (may be a small amount only, but it's still money you're giving her).

I am surprised that a DH who has worked in HK for 10 years and has an excellent reference from her previous employer, is prepared to accept the 'basic wage' you are offering her.


Paying DH's travel expenses to Central on her day off. We pay our helper's travel expenses to Central/Wanchai on her day off (ie $54 for the return ferry fare plus bus fares). We think it is a reasonable request, as our helper is active in her church community in Wanchai. Our helper deducts her travel expenses from the housekeeping money each week.


Agent's fees. We hired our helper direct from the Philippines. We paid all agency fees including her share of the agency fees. Of course, we did not have to pay our helper's share of the agency fees, but we thought it best that we did (as we did not want her to borrow money for this purpose). In your case, I think it is better to lend your helper the money for the agency fees than for her to borrow the money from a loan shark (provided you obtain her written consent to deducting a monthly loan repayment amount from her salary each month (not exceeding 50% of the month's salary). Any loan repayment arrangement should be committed to writing, and signed by both parties.


Views on Loans.

From past experience, I would make your views on borrowing from loan sharks very clear at the outset. Even though we stressed to our helper at the outset, that we did not want her taking out loans, we still had a loan problem with her at the outset of the contract. We resolved that matter, but did stress to her that if it happened again, we would think very seriously about whether we wished to continue our employer/employee relationship with her.