I looking for the helper to look after my baby & housekeep due to I & my husband need to outside working. Interview many, but they hear my house have camera, they'll not apply this job.
Actullay, I don't why.... due to I was mentioned the camera only for see my baby due to missing her as we long time stay outside. I feed distressed.
Everyday, we hears a lot of bad news due to part of bad helper.
I un-believe who parent can pass the baby to stranger unless build the good relationship.
Goodluck me can find a good one.
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No good can come of cameras in the home to watch over. Even if you only have them to look at your kid, it is perceived as constant overwatch. The employee becomes self conscious and afraid of being judged for every little thing.
By putting the camera in there, you are automatically assuming that there may be problems. You cannot build a relationship based on trust if, by putting in a camera, you show that you do not trust the helper.
Sure, there are problem helpers out there. But the reason you hear those stories more is that people love to tell them. Very seldom do you hear the "my helper is amazing" stories.
Long story short: cameras to watch helpers are almost always a bad idea.
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Just keep interveiwing helpers, look for one who comes with verbal or face to face meeting with their last empoloyer, try different nationalities.
If they have a proven work record with babies/ young children, and are honest then they shouldn't worry about you having a nanny cam in your house, what have they got to loose? nothing.
Tell them at interveiw, you have a Nanny cam, and that is just so you can see your baby, and that in lots of countries it is a standard in kindregartens/ nurseries to have one of these, so that parents can feel happy at work when their children are happy. In fact I know a few of the bigger kennels in UK who have cams so that dog/cat owners can feel happy when leaving their pets.
Good luck to you, it is worth waiting for the right helper for your needs.
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No question, just want to share my situation to release my bad feeling.
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Susie, Totally agreed.
They nothing to losse if they are honest.
If they scares that due to sleeping whole day or doing somthing bad, I thinks this is a big concern for them.
At the begining, I trust her and look like family member, but too many time to let me disapointed.
In fact, the camera can for me seeing my cute baby but can't see her heart. Now my baby has many new bruise everyday, but I can't do anything.
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If you trust here and look at her like a family member, there is no need for the camera.
It doesn't matter if she is a perfect employee. She will have a hard time not wondering if you are judging everything she does.
I'll say it again: no good can come of this. Unless you have concrete suspicions of a crime or some other bad behavior, don't do it.
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I have to disagree with you, nobody will worry with a Nanny cam around if they are good and honest.
We don't stop going in shops or anywhere else where security cams are present just in case we might do something wrong!! do we.
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You say your baby has new bruises every day....guess what? So does mine! As soon as babies start moving, they start falling and inevitably get a few bruises! My little one is 13 months and had 2 bruises and 2 grazes on his face last month at one time from falling. He started crawling before 5 months and was walking at 8 months and 9 days so we've had a few months of him falling and getting bruised now! He's totally fearless! I remember my eldest son had a black eye once when he was around 12 months old from falling and hitting his face on the coffee table (solid wood, round edges, very child friendly) and looked like a beaten child. I hadn't done anything wrong but it didn't stop strangers from giving me judgmental looks. Give your helper the benefit of the doubt. If your child seems happy with her, things are likely to be good when you're not around. Also, please learn to let go a little. Helicopter parents who hover constantly and don't learn to trust that their child can do anything for themselves don't help their development in the long run. Good luck.
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dorispiglet, you say you "only want to see your baby". But you also talk about new bruises, indicating you suspect something. Which is it?
If you think there is a problem, ask the helper about it before installing cameras.
Susie1, it very much depends on the surveillance. In a shop what they are looking for is theft. In a household environment, with a helper, you are trying to see if the employee is behaving well. That's a very hard thing to judge from a camera picture. It is very easy for suspicion to creep in, and for micromanagement to start. As adele78 says, don't be a helicopter parent. It is unhealthy both for baby and parent.
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Let me explain more……
Now my baby (call her “BB”) 20 months, can speak little her think.
Before 18 months , “BB” love my helper (call her “A”) more than me. I feel very lucky I can found a good one.
But recently 2 months, don’t know why “A” face changed, I ask her many times “are you sick, unhappy, your family has issue…..”, she reply me “nothing” only. And mainly “BB” don’t like to let “A” carry , play, sleep &….. together.
Between this 3 wks effects too much think
Case 1 on before 4 wks
One day “BB” falling down and hurt her knee when she playing in the park. I used alcohol to clean her bruises, she crazy cry. After that, she show her bruises to each people and said that “Mum Mum do that”. (I think BB feels Mum Mum made her pain)
Case 2 on before 3 wks
“BB”s leg has 2x 10cm bruises, I ask BB who do that, she said “A do that”. I ask “A” why have bruises on “BB” leg, “A” reply “don’t know” only.
Case 3 on before 2 wks
“BB” falling down by herself, I ask BB “is Pa Pa mindless to made you fall down”, BB said “BB do that” .
Case 4 on last Friday
“BB” point to her arm said that “A”s name, I ask “BB” are u feel pain, she to bow, but I can’ find a bruises. Next 2 days, when “BB” change cloths, her arm has scar. I ask “A”, but “A” reply “don’t know” only.
Case 5 on last Tue
“BB” neck has bruises….again
Start fm day 1 have installed camera in my house, so I don’t think all problem due to the camera.
I hope this is an accident. We must have love & patience due to I agreed care baby is not easy job.
But anyway, I will keeping to find a replacement. Thanks a lot for your share.
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When you say neck bruises, again, how often has this happened before?
Babies do not fall accidently to cause neck bruises, is he /she being allowed to play with a noose!
Also 2 x 10 cm bruises is rather a lot on a small 20 months olds tiny legs.
Babies do fall naturally while they are learning to walk properly, often they will bang their forehead, or get a small bruise or scrape on the arms or legs (elbows or knees usually hit the ground), sometimes the hip area. They will cry when scrapes are treated, this is normal.
Have you ever shown these bruises to your family doctor, maybe it would be a good idea to do so, for each new bruise, for the doctor to check and make sure there is no blood disorder which could cause bruises like this, in very rare cases having a blood disorder can cause bruising, and if this found it can be treated, and will put your mind at rest about your helpers competence. I would definately have this check to make sure baby doesn't have a rare blood disorder.
However the fact your child, does not want to play, sleep or be carried by the helper would suggest your baby is frightened, and the fact your helper cannot offer plausable explanations for bruises and seems subdued is worrying, maybe she cannot cope with a toddler as it becomes more active.
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I think I used wrong word "bruises", due to the scar so deep on the leg, arm & neck same as cut.
bb 10 month can walk, between period just 3-4 times made her bruises.
Thanks for good idea, I will see the doctor if have further scar.
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Well, if there are bruises and cuts and scars this is a problem. My point is that I don't see how cameras will solve the problem.
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I'm confused. You say there are all these bruises on your baby, but you have camera inside your house? Why don't you just go through the tapes and see what happened and see how your maid interact with the baby.
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Most of these "home systems" are real time only. No recording.
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