Single guy hiring female FDH

I separated from my wife in December, when she left with the dog, but she has since found that she is required to work in Shanghai and New York on extended trips, and has asked me to take our dog back.


I work in Hong Kong teahching kindergarten during the day, and 6th form and HK Police in the evenings. I've therefore decided to hire a FDH, and have found a great woman with a lot of experience caring for double-coated, large dogs in a hot cliimate (our dog is a husky).


The interview went very well and she controlled the dog with confidence when they met, giving her clear verbal commands. She then took her out for a short walk, and handled her like a pro. She'll have to break contract, and so we'll need to go through an agency.


The agency however, have told me that as my status will be 'single male', my application will be delayed by immigration and possibly even rejected, and I would be better hiring a male helper.


I don't want the helper to break her contract, only to find that I have the application rejected on this rather discriminatory ground.


Does anybody have experience of this, or are there any single males onsite that have hired female helpers?


Thanks,

Paul

Hi Paul,

Why don't you phone or email Immigration, explain your circumstances, and ask them whether they would approve, before you send in any forms, I am sure there must be single guys around who employ helpers.

Thanks, Susie.

I've done just that, as info on the net is thin regarding this issue. I'll let you know what they reply.

they will just say that you should apply and they will review the application and decide accordingly.

Likely you will need to provide pics of your home. Her sleeping quarters, list of her duties. If you live in a small flat, likely she won't get approved even if you do have a dog. Best wishes

Thank you scorpio and hkwatcher.

What would you suggest as a suitable size? Obviously the larger the better, but that isn't really realistic.

I'm looking at between 600 - 800, with a minimum of 2 bedrooms (the helper will get her own room, not a bed in a hallway). Tasha (my dog) will need some space to run and play without destroying everything, so a rooftop would be great.

So that I can afford it, it will mean moving to Yuen Long, Fan Ling or Sai Kung etc.

Ok, here's their response:



"Dear Sir/Madam,


Thank you again for your e-mail message.


There is no restriction that a single male employer cannot hire a female domestic helper. As you may be aware, applications for employment of foreign domestic helpers to work in Hong Kong are dealt with in accordance with the established procedures and mechanism. In considering the applications, we will take into account all available information and ascertain if the helpers and the employers meet the eligibility criteria before decisions are made. Each application will be considered on its own merits and approval will only be given in justifiable circumstances.


Regards,

TANG Yiu-keung

for Director of Immigration"


I'm viewing apartments over the weekend as my wife has already gone to Shanghai for a few days this week, and had to return Tasha to the SPCA for boarding. Understandably Tasha hates going back there, and likely thinks we are giving her up.

If I find a suitable place then I'll take it and start the ball rolling. I've already spoken to immigration about not having utility bills in my name, and they said that's fine, given the circumstance.


Thanks for your advice and input, everyone.

Dear Condemned75 - you're a good man and I hope Tascha understands that she is loved. Good luck.

By the way, we are interviewing a couple of dog carers for our puppy. When your interviewer was walking the dog, did you follow them? or did you observe from afar?

Thanks almostthere.

I observed from a distance, so as not to distract both her AND Tasha. Because of Tasha's history, she suffers from agrophobia and doesn't like being outdoors. Any loud noises or sudden movements and if she is not on the lead, she will bolt.

It was great to see her being handled with confidence, and I really feel that having somebody at home full-time to look after her will build Tasha's confidence too. If I get delayed on the way home, she will pee and poo on the floor and uisually find something to destory, so I'm looking to start this process asap.

Dear Condemned75 - our rescued puppy was the same and would pee and poop the minute we walk out of the door (even just to drop the garbage). our trainer suggested a crate and that was a game changer for us. she only needed it for a few weeks. but of course the love and touch from a human is the best solution and you are doing the right thing for her! good luck.

I applied for a DH with similar circumstances as you and there was no problem, no request for photos, no special conditions, and all went smoothly.


However, you do need to make a case for it in the application, and maybe os I was thorough there there aint no hitch in the process. You have to list all her duties and who did them before and whyyou need a DH now.


One of my main points was I had adopted a dog from SPCA who was heartlessly abandoned by his family and I saved him from the glue factory (or whatever they do in HK!) And that SPCA does wonderful work in rectifying such i justices i the community and I am proud to be associated with it etc. And I need the DH to look after the dog and as I travel a fair bit for work.


Another reason I said was worked long hours and had recently moved to NT so less tome for shopping and food cooking etc.


I had to list duties so listed about 10 tasks such as dog care, shopping at wet market prepare food, cook dinners, laundry, ironing, bathroom cleaning, vacuuming, mopping, car washing etc. So it didnt sound like there was nothing much for her to do or like a scam (which it aint anyhow!).


And for the questions about who did it before I wrote the dog is new so no need for DH before and before I lived close to work so no need before. So basically change in two major circumstances.


Also I think why I wanted her was cos she was previously a friend's DH for a few years and although I didnt k ow her personally and had never really spoken to her, I had seen her work for my friend's family and knew her to be honest and hard working and jad observed her dilligence for a few years. And as friend was going bsck to UK I siezed ollortu ity to take over the employment contract.


Anyhow, was easy. DH did processing herself and never heard there could be a problem cos I was single man. I never heard that either.


However I woild not be surprised if you were subjcted to a higher level of scrutiny.


So I would make the application justifiably persuasive as did I. Make the cjange incircumstances compelling I would think. And they ask i the form your relationship with the proposed DH. Make sure you say no relationship, only propoed employer/employee relationship. Do NOT say potential girlfriend/lover! Even if she is cute! Joking but that would be what Immigratikn wojld not want I guess.


Good luck!

Thanks maxis,


It's encouraging to hear you got through it ok, and thanks for the advice.


I've already prepared a list of duties for her, which is quite extensive, and then given additional information and instruction for each direction; dog grooming (which brush to use, when, where etc), dog washing (how frequent, shampoo to use etc), dog feeding (she has irritable bowl disease and so can only eat hypoalergenic food that is prescribed by a vet - I also don't want her to buy any supplies from a pet shop that sells animals, as the animals usually come from puppy farms. Better she go to the SPCA in Causeway Bay for all supplie).

Dog walking (how to control Tasha, make her sit at kerbs, walk her on the left, on a short lead using both hands, muzzled so she cannot eat anything off the floor, but not so tight that she can't open her mouth to pant etc).


Actually all of this is more for imigration rather than the helper. In the interview it became very clear that she knows what she is doing and loves animals as much as I do. I did ask her if she has ever eaten cat or dog, and she honestly replied with "yes, when she was a child and very poor, but she grew to love and respect animals as she got older, having her own dogs that lived long, healthy lives." - this is the sort of thing an employer can't really teach, it is down to the helpers character and is the reason I want this helper in particular. I'm English and have a very "a dog is part of the family" attitude.


There'll be no question of romance, no matter how cute. I'm still hoping after my wife's extensive working trips, we can attempt a reconciliation.


Thanks again, for all your advice!

Try not to worry too much. You have a valid need for a helper.


I used to work for a bachelor, too. He has no dogs, no kids. All he did was mention in the email than he need someone to look after the house when he is away, take phone calls when he is at work and do general housekeeping, that I will have my own room and the papers were processed without a glitch.


As for cuteness, people can be professional and not all helpers would want to be their available boss's girl. I did have a laugh when I heard my boss advised his fellow single guy on finding a helper he went like.. helpers are like painting, you get to see them everyday for at least two years so make sure they are pleasing to the eyes. lol What a dork.

Thanks souffleQueen.


Can ask both you and Masix, what size are/were your apartments? I haven't chosen yet but have been looking at around 650/700 sq ft. for 2 or 3 bedroom, but if I can get away with about 450 or 500, that would be much better. If I look much further out I'll be in Shenzen!