DHs on short employment

I recently noticed that more than a few DHs listed on this site only worked for a few months or even a few weeks in their current/immediate past contracts. What's going on? Are FDHs becoming more assertive, choosy or are they tricking employers into hiring them so they can look for greener pastures? Or something else?

They finish contracts for various reasons, some are honest- maybe the employer has had to relocate, but more often that they are not suited to the particular employer. Some are lazy, some can't cook-when they say they can at interview, some have bad hygiene habits and are not good around children, where hygiene standards need to be higher, also some are just not good, and bad tempered around children, or don't know how to control children properly.

Some helpers steal, and often the employer will get rid of them, rather than inform the police or immigration, so they get passed onto the next unfortunate employer-to do the same again.

There are so many reasons why these women have so many employers, there are some, I know one in particular, who is very cheeky, she is charming at interview, gets employer, then annoys employer, because she is very lippy, and disobedient, and gets fired, then the employer has to pay for air tickets back home to Fils. This particular helper stays with and employer a maximum of 6 months, sometimes only3, so she gets lots of employer payed for holidays off unsuspecting employers,She used to be employed by our next door neighbour, and wear clothes out of the employers wife's wardrobe, when the employer and wife was away, and have all her mates there for BBQs,and once was begging us for a job, of course there was no way I would employ her, she is toxic!! Her name is Nancy, and she is probably sporadically in HK doing a bit of work, between 'holidays' in Fils, when she is sacked.

NuinHK, this is a fair comment.


My current DH isn't great but she's okay coz I'm not perfect either. But every now and again, she'll say things like, "I insist on going back to Indonesia in July (even though she's only worked 6 months into the contract) or else she will consider resigning. Or if I comment on how she could improve (my husband and I told her we're worried that she's not cooking veggies for my eldest daughter daily) she'll get all upset with me and tell me I could bring her back to the agent if I don't like her. She doesn't tell me on the spot. She will text me.


Once when I only reminded her about something, she texted me in Indonesian saying, "You don't have to tell me, I know how to do it". She's retaliating in another language but to my face.


She isn't the first DH to have done that. The past year has been mad. One resigned due to pregnancy (on her own accord because she was afraid her time apart from her boyfriend would make him leave her. Her ex husband already left her for another girl), one left because she wanted to go back to her ex employer (she took 2 years break, worked 1 month with me and went back to her old employer) and then I had one that I terminated because her mind was not on the job, said her husband was having an affair and told all the helpers at my estate that she wanted to give notice to me.


I keep thinking about what I've done that may have caused all these DHs to leave coz it takes two for things not to work out.


So my current DH, the one that keeps threatening me that she'd resign, is still with me.... and now I've got the agent to speak to her. I'm frustrated and upset.


I don't expect perfection or anything. But as an employer, am I not entitled to express my opinion on my family affairs, especially when I do it respectfully? I've not raised my voice and have never scolded her.


Oh well... I really don't know what's happening either. What a headache after my helper of 4 years left....

YOU are absolutely entitled to voice your personal experience of Domestic Helpers in Hong Kong. You do not need permission from anyone to do that. THIS IS YOUR RIGHT as an Employer.


Furthermore, be WARNED that many of the replies in response to this topic OSTENSIBLY from other "Expats" may not be real nor truthful.


The FACT IS ... many MALE Expats DEFENDING Filipino domestic helpers on this site are in reality "Special Interest Groups". Do NOT be surprised if these are exactly the same men (or men responding as lady Expats) who are either ... (1) dating (2) and SCREWING or (3) married to theirs or somebody else's ex Domestic Helper. WE HAVE SEEN IT ALL.

I am speaking in behalf of the Fdh's here in HK specially Filipinos.

I wouldn't disagree that there are really helpers as such but please do not generalize because a lot of this DH sacrifice being away from their own family just to earn for them to be able to send their children to school or give their family a taste of a better life. They take care of other people's children instead of taking care of their own. I need not say more about the things that they sacrifice for their family. It all boils down to a person's character and values. Not all employers are good. There are some also who are ill mannered. Point is.... helpers are there to HELP AND NOT TAKE CHARGE IN BRINGING UP YOUR CHILDREN.