Adoption of my wifes son (Singapore).

Hi,


I recently married my wife (Singaporean) in Singapore. I am English and will be moving to Singapore in Jan.


My wife has a 8 year old son and the plan is to adopt him.


Her first husband signed a seperation agreement giving up his rights of contact (he was never interested) in exchange for no maintenance. Sole custordy was awarded to her in the divorce. Her sons father has had no contact with either of them for around 7 years.


My wife has no information of her ex husbands current address (he is Malay and was working in Singapore on a work permit while they were together).


Can anyone advise of options available and possibly recomend a laywer who would be able to help.


One suggestion is filing for abandonment if we cannot locate the ex husband.


Many thanks

RB

Hi,


Thanks for the replies.


I am not yet a PR but will apply on grounds of tech skills after moving there permanently in Jan. I will be transferred through the bank I currently work for.


The thing I find strange is that as noted it mentions the parent (single) when surely there are two parents to a child usually.


The reason for wanting advice of reputable lawyers is that after my wife phoned around she was quoted between S$2,000 and S$5,000 so it looked like the lawyers were just plucking figures out of the air. Only one company seemed to be interested at all.


It would also be good to know what legal writes I have as the husband of someone with sole custody over a child from a previous marriage. The worry is not over the father trying to get involved but more of trying to find the father to ask him to sign the forms required to allow me to adopt.

Many thanks

RB

Great that is very helpful although this makes me wonder why we were told by a number of lawyers in Singapore when enquiring about changing his surname to match mine by deed poll (he has his mother family name as it was changed after their divorce) that it required both parents signitures and most of the lawyers would not even entertain the idea of taking on the case if both signitures were not readily available. Would have thought that adoption being far more serious would only be as if not more stringent.


Does anyone know about filing for abandonment. We are trying also to plan for if we cannot locate her ex husband and if we were told we need both signitures. What if the father had passed away, being Malay, how could we prove it. I would imagine if he has gone to Malaysia then it would be a nightmare to try and track him down.


Cheers

RB

Hi, in my home jurisdiction you can file a court petition to terminate the parental rights under these circumstances. In the judicial proceeding to terminate parental rights, you jump through the hoops of making the effort to find the father (give him "notice" by publication if you cannot physically locate him) and proving his lack of support or visitation. The effect of this procedure is that it gives you a judicial order -- a piece of paper -- that officially frees the child for adoption. After that, the adoption is a piece of cake.

Hi RimBlock,

To have his mother's family name will be a big questions here..

Even if after the divorce the child cannot changed his last name (birth cet)to his mother's last name under the law of Singapore.

the only time the child can carry his mother last name if the child is born out of wedlock.

To trace his father in Malaysia will be a big problem here.

If she's married in Malaysia and he ex husband has a 1st wife.. maybe she by law are not his legal wife and could be the child born in Singapore,that is why the child carring her last name. She could have gone to Golok to get married to this man and in Singapore the married are reconise.

You need to ask your wife about this, the reason I mentioned this is because this happened to 1 of my friend.

There's one particular lawyer that I know for many years (recommended many people) could help you.

Have you looked at the married and divorce cert? If so then it should not be the problem. If he's malyasian you can contact the lawyer there to help you. She should know where his home town and his family in Malaysia. It will be strange if she does'nt knows his family located at and which states he's from.

Our Singapore associates have indicated that you may submit an application for adoption even if your wife's ex-husband cannot be located. However, Court's leave to dispense with the ex-husband's consent in the adoption application is required.


Please contact our Mr. Shane Weir for an initial interview at HK$2,500 to discuss the matter further.


Weir & Associates

Solicitors & Notaries

2108 Gloucester Tower, The Landmark

15 Queens Road Central

Hong Kong

Tel : 2526-1767

Fax : 2868-3568

email: weirlaw@hongkonglaw.com

www.HongKongLaw.com/weirlaw

Thanks for all the replies. It is nice to know people are willing to offer advice and suggestions and to try and help.


As far as I am aware, my wife married her ex in Singapore while he was here working. He had a very reputable job in an IT company and was fairly well off. He has since severed all contact with ex colleagues who my wife may still know so she has no way of contacting him. She has written to his last known address but has received no reply and no returned mail.


This really is a bit of a two sided battle as we both agree that it needs to be done but I feel she feels on her own with her being in Singapore and me being in the UK for the time being. It is also quite frustrating for me not being there to help her. She also really does not want to contact her ex due to all the 'water the has passed under the bridge' but knows she needs to.


Her sons surname was changed to my wife's family name by deed poll in Singapore with the fathers signature after their divorce. My wife is not too hot on keeping her documents very orderly (I know...... I will be looking after all the documents after I move there).


I would imagine she would know the last contact for his family although that may not be the current address what with no contact for 7 years. She is even more hesitant to contact them due to the past.


The problem I can see also is that we can get Singapore registration department to send a letter asking him to contact us but there is no guarantee that he will and what to do if he doesn't. They for obvious reasons will not give his contact details to us. Would he be liable under any law if he refuses to contact us on matters regarding his son ?


I was also quite surprised when a few lawyers my wife spoke to offered no help in tracking him down. One comment I believe was along the lines of "we are not private investigators, you have to find him yourself and if you can't then we cannot help you". I would have thought that they could have suggested the Registration department as a good place to start.


Termination of his parental rights would probably be the preferred option as he has no wish to be associated with his son or ex wife. It would be interesting to see the best way to go about this in Singapore. Are there any links people know of regarding this subject ?.


Once again, thanks for all the replies.


RB

RimBlock, if you are still interested with the lawyer in singapore let me know. I last saw him min Sept and he did mentioned to me that he's now trying to locate someone overseas. I don't understand why the lawyers telling you that they are not PI. I would think if you are paying someone they should be the one to do all dirty work.. that's what the lawyers are for!!

Hi Autumn,


Yes contact details would be very welcome and then I can have at least a quick chat and see what his views are and what my options may be.


Regards

RB

RimBlock, please check your PM. I have the contact details of the lawyer.

You can contact Ms Carolyn Tan from Tan & Au Partnership. Phone number: 62238500.


BTW, I am a partner in Tan & Au Partnership. I am not a family lawyer. So, I don't have the answers to your questions. Furthermore, I am based in Guangzhou, China. Nevertheless, Ms Tan will be glad to serve you.

Hi,


Just as an update.


My Wifes ex has replied and seems ok about signing the adoption papers.


From here it seems we only have to go through the court process and the assesment of me.


It would be good if someone could give me an idea of what the assesment will consist of so I can make sure I have what is needed (paperwork wise) and am a little prepared.


Many thanks

RB