Posted by
boss
19 yrs ago
Hi,
My baby is 9 months old and we decided to put him in his own room when we move house, in his usual cot. Problem is he began screaming middle of the night, started again with taking his dreamfeed, and won't settle even after a long rocking. He used to be sleeping thru the night and no more dreamfeed. What's wrong? baby sense that he is alone in the room? What do we do? we end up carrying him in our room and bed and he sleeps well. Maybe he is still adjusting with the new house.
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i take it that before the house move, he was sleeping in the same room with you and husband but in his own cot?
in that case, maybe what you need is to get him used to the new house in general first and this probably means keep to the same sleeping arrangements with all in the same room but in his own cot. then gradually make the move to his own room. you were probably hoping that with the move, it would be your chance to get him into his own room but at 9 months, your little one will have firm ideas on how he wants to go to bed at night!!
good luck, hope it works out. we moved house when my kid was 7 months and even though he always slept in his own room, he still took time to adjust to his new room.
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boss
19 yrs ago
thanks wheelymate, yes, he was sleeping in the same room with us in his own cot.
We really thought all is well with his sleeping routine and it would be easy for him to sleep in his own room now. Babies are smarter than i thought ;-) I'll put him in our room tonight and see how it goes.
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Elizabeth Pantley in her book the "no Cry sleep method" for babies - talks about this. I remember vaguely the "slow" movement away. So the cot is currently by your bed - move it closer to the door gradually bit by bit...and then into the hallway (this may not be too feasible) and then into your room.
Otherwise, if you want a faster harder a approach - ferber's method is appropriate. You can start using that from 6 months. Most people have a love or hate relationship with him - but his results are generally faster, although the initial crying much harder.
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There's no real problem with baby in the same room with you. How can the most amount of people get the most amount of sleep? Give your child a chance to get over the big change in your lives first before trying a new arrangement. Hang in there!
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boss
19 yrs ago
Hi,
Our room is smaller so i have to put baby's cot in another room. I don't have any choice last night but to pick him up at 4am when he screams non stop and put in our bed and breastfeed to let him sleep. I've read Ferber's book, it works wonderfully last time when i stop the night time BF, it works.
With the way we're doing now, sleeping in our bed, BF anytime middle of the night, we're back to square one. I'll let him adjust to the new environment and will do Ferber's method again. Thanks.
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tly
19 yrs ago
Our baby's cot is in our room at the moment, but not for long either. She's now 7months, but ever since she was born, I've always blocked the view so she wouldn't see us while in her cot. I'm hoping this would ease the transition when we finally clear up the guest bedroom and transform it into her room. Ferber also mentioned blocking off the view of your baby.
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i'm a new mom and from what i've read/heard so far, I'm a vehement opposer of the ferber method.
apparently he's changing tracks too...
http://www.post-gazette.com/pg/05319/606752.stm
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Ferber is GREAT - but it's not for every parent nor every baby. He's a sleep expert - not the sleep nazi that people make him out to be. The man has studied sleep for longer than any of the other experts out there and is the foremost expert of his field. BUT people take BITS of his advice, abuse it and don't understand the full context of what he is saying. That is the main problem - his method is misunderstood. People want to take the "controlled crying" bit- but don't sit and try to figure out WHY the baby is having a hard time - which actually if you read the ENTIRE book, he teaches you to figure out.
But he has softened his approach in his newly revised edition - clarifying more clearly when NOT to use his approach. But the overall message is still very very clear and good.
I've had great success with his approach in a number of different situations. (depending on the age of my child and the cause of nighttime wakings.) He's NOT to be used if your baby is under 6 months (but people try to use it too early again - and that is not what he advocates. I've found his advice for toddlers and helping them stay in bed, and sleep on their own invaluable - when my daughter refused to stay in her bed after she became a toddler, Ferber saved me. I read his entire book, figured out the problem and he literally changed my daughter's (and my life) in two short nights.
But again - he's not for everyone - and I definitely believe his method should NOT be applied unless you read the entire book and are properly diagnosing and understanding your child's issues. My daughter was suffering from night terrors - and he has a different approach for solving that compared to other middle of the night issues.
Good luck!
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boss
19 yrs ago
I totally agree with HKchoichoi, my baby only sleep thru the night after i read his book. Our usual routine was rock him to sleep at 7:30pm. He will wake up after an hour or two and i have to rush and BF him just to let him go to sleep again, dreamfeed at 10:30pm. Then he will wake up twice middle of the night and we BF again til he sleeps, i have to give him to the helper in the morning so i can sleep. After reading Ferber's book (i think i only read 2-3 chapters), i followed it for TWO night only, believe it or not, now i put him to his own cot awake, smiling then he turns to his side to sleep without me rocking him anymore. I gradually removed the dreamfeed too. The hardest part is removing the BF in the night but i was able to do that with husband's help for two nights (on a weekend). He now sleeps from 7:30 to 6am(?) I really don't know what time he wakes up as he usually plays til i get him at 7am to BF. Well, his sleep problem now is due to moving him to his own room and new house, but slowly, he can adjust to that hopefully. He slept thru til 5:30am last night and i'm happy with that.
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smsm
19 yrs ago
wow boss that sounds really good..how old is ur baby...mine is just 2 months old now..but would definitely like to read the book going forward...
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Smsm -
read - but don't use Ferber until your baby is at least 6 months old. He actually prefers older babies for his method. For younger babies, Pantley is nice - although her method is slow and evolves over time, and I love Gina Ford - but her method is again a love it or hate it type situation.
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boss
19 yrs ago
hi smsm, i did that to my baby around 6 months+. he is now 9 months.
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