Posted by
HK01
19 yrs ago
yes it's a compliment and means you look healthy
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gabb
19 yrs ago
No, it's rude! I'm Asian too! You do not call people fat, especially not your employers!
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HK01
19 yrs ago
hmmm, then I guess my Asian friends have lied to me telling me that it meant a compliment. Perhaps I should tell them they are "fat" and see how they react.
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It ain't no compliment at all !
My friends helper looked at her this week and said, "You getting fat" right in front of guests. My friend was so dissappointed by that.
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I'm not sure what she did - will find out.
I do remember her saying something like "did you just say I'm fat?" and the maid laughed but no one else in the room did so I am sure the maid knows better. She's been here for 9 years too.
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Helpers i don't know always call my baby fat when in fact he is not overweight.
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Yes Pumpkin - tell one they seem to be a larger size these days and holy hell the wrath !!!
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I was a size 00 and now am a size 2 (so I'm by no means FAT!)... but when shopping in Beijing, shop assistants wouldn't even allow me to try things on - they just give me the once-over and say (very loudly)"we don't have anything in your size"! I had to physically push past one of them last winter to try on a coat that I wanted(which, btw, fitted like a glove).
When I was at the tooth-pick size 00, they used to say that I'm too skinny and nothing would fit me.
I think it's a case of people having insecurities about themselves - added to the fact that a lot of them lack the kind of tact that Western cultures are used to.
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maxis
19 yrs ago
Personal comments are not regarded as appropriate by educated people in most cultures.
Comments about one's body are particularly rude.
When someone says "your fat", perhaps say "your eyes are too close together, or lips are too thick/thin/crooked, or have strange shaped feet, and going to a gym ain't going to fix your personal genetic defects dear!"
Although mean, you'll find you wont ever get a personal comment from that person again !
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mayo
19 yrs ago
Are you fat? If not take it as a compliment but if you are a little chubby then use it motivation for change. Just because fat is the national average in a lot of our home countries doesn't mean fat is the new thin. Maybe she is just giving you a heads up that it's time to do something about it. Asian women are built smaller than us but lean is still lean and fat is still fat on any build. Cindy Crawford-big build, lean girl. Kelly Osbourne-petite build, fat girl. Instead of holding their ability maintain their weight against them take a leaf out the asian diet book, living here is your chance incorporate the best of asia into your lifestyle. Seize the day.
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I would want to snap back too but I wouldn't. Silence with a stare seems to do the trick.
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YES, I think you're right unfortunately.
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TC
19 yrs ago
My husband does a fair bit of work in Vietnam, and they often used to greet him with a comment re how 'fat' he looked. He wasn't fat at all (even though he has put on a bit in more recent years) and on questioning others about it they confirmed it was an oblique way of saying how well he looked. Even now (with those extra kilos around his girth) he laughs it off and makes his own decision re whether he needs to lose weight - totally unrelated to the comments received. Whilst such comments would be totally unacceptable (other than from close relatives) in his home country they are received as being OK in places like Vietnam where no offence is intended and none taken either. Interestingly no such comment has ever been received by him in HK.
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It's when the shop girls point and laugh hysterically at your feet and say waaaaaaaaaaa so big lah that gets me !!!!
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I do not agree one bit. Most people who have lived in HK for years know it's bad to call anyone fat to their face.
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MayC
19 yrs ago
My helper takes great pride when someone says my daughter has put on weight. It's a sign that she's looking after my daughter well.
My security officer has also said at times that I've put on weight and I have given her a blank stare.. she would then quickly say, "It's a compliment. You look so much healthier now". I know she means well because she's knitted so many cardigans for my little girl.
Having said that, I do see so many thin local girls who buy diet pills because they want to be thinner!!
So I'm not really sure myself.
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I have a hard time with the boob staring all the time. It just gives me the creeps.
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