Hi All,
I want to buy some books on bringing up boys and also some toddler activities, so helper has some idea of what do with baby during the day.
books i've shortlisted are
365 YOU AND YOUR TODDLER WILL LOVE by Roni C Leiderman (GYMBOREE BOOK).
THE TODDLER'S BUSY BOOK by TRish Kuffner
RAISING BOYS; WHY BOYS ARE DIFFERENT BY STEVE BIDDULPH
THE TROUBLE WITH BOYS by Angela Philips
if any of you have these books i'd love to know if they are good or not. Also would appreciate suggestions on good books.
Thanks!
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crj
18 yrs ago
The BEST activity books I found were the gymboree series. They are super easy to understand, have great photos, and both my helper in HK and I used them a lot
http://www.amazon.com/Toddler-Play-Gymboree-Wendy-Masi/dp/0865734356
Let me know if you find anything else, and if you ever find anything in CHINESE...
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crj, i ordered the one by wendy masi from Amazon.co.uk, but 1. they didint have it in stock and two their alternate seller gave me my money back sayign that he didn't have it anymore :((
BTW how long does it take for stuff to get here from amazon.com? the last time i ordered from them they lost a couple of my books adn it toook aaaaaaaaaages to get the ones that eventually did arrive.
chinese??? mmmm that would be hard. hope somebody else has suggestions... i know gymboree has some franchises in beijing, maybe you could give them a call and ask?
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"BTW how long does it take for stuff to get here from amazon.com? "
From the Amazon US, you're talking about 10-14 days. From Amazon UK I haven't tried. However you can order from Paddyfields.com. They are not much faster, but they are much cheaper since they ship from HK.
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Thanks very much for the info and tip. I knew there was a HK online bookstore, it just could not remember it's name! will now check out if they have the books i want.
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Hi, I bought a number of these books on toddlers' activities and I'm not using them anymore since my boys are now 7 and 4. Some years ago, I had the idea of setting up a playgroup and thus bought a number of books on setting up playgroups, too. the books do contain lots of creative ideas, songs and games. I intend to sell these books at very low prices. Anyone interested in these books? Will give you a list of titles once I check them on my shelves.
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thanks all for the feedback. my books are on the way!!
joshmom, I'm really hoping that the biddulph book will give me some pointers on bringing up boys. for some reason i feel a bit at a loss.
luxury, can you post the titles of the books you bought? If not please pm me a list and also how much you want for them thanks!
Also has anyone read or have a copy of happiest toddler on the block by harvey karper? is it any good.
my baby has suddnely gone from being an undemanding little angel to a clingy brat that wants everything and cries when refused.... i need help!
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"my baby has suddnely gone from being an undemanding little angel to a clingy brat that wants everything and cries when refused.... i need help!"
Did he turn 2?
It's all about setting firm limits and not being afraid to say no and/or remove things despite the tantrums. Otherwise it will just get worse. There will be times when your child will do things he/she knows are bad just to see what happens. Give one stern warning and then send him/her on a time-out. Without consequences there is no learning at this stage.
Having said that, don't snap just for anything. Enormous patience is required. Try to figure out what is actually happening. Is he/she hungry and/or tired?
If you do set firm limits, the behavior will slowly abate (it will probably take several months). If you keep letting him/her behave this way, and giving in, it will just get worse and in the end you'll have a teenager giving you the finger.
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axpatguy, mine is only 14months old. i now am begining to dread the time he will turn 2.
We are very firm with him and no means no. we also read someplace to decide on what to say no to and stick with that as lots of things that babies want to do are no's on different scales.
four teeth are coming in all at once and apparently he's at the age that separation anxiety kicks in in a big way, so not quite sure if there is a problem that's serious or it's jsut a phase he's going through.
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"We are very firm with him and no means no. we also read someplace to decide on what to say no to and stick with that as lots of things that babies want to do are no's on different scales."
Correct. Also, it will seem as if nothing happens. Behavior remains the same etc... Stick with it! Things do get better but it takes months, and there are occasional relapses. I do feel that it is totally worth it being firm.
Then again, sometimes we all have to make sure we don't laugh. The facial expressions and phrases she uses during some tantrums are hilarious.
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at around 14 months the kids also go into the "fear of abandonment" stage - so when you leave the room they wonder if you are coming back and tend to freak out - will pass - not sure when tho - mine still do it at 21 months... As for Amazon UK - takes 5-6 days - pretty great - I get my books there - still cheaper...
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Fear of abandonment typically starts anywhere from 9 months to 15 months, and tapers off after that.
It is thought to be caused by babies being able to visualize things abstractly. Before that, out of sight is pretty much out of mind. But now they can visualize remember mommy. Where's mommy?!? It tapers off when they start to figure out that mommy always comes back.
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Hi Goddess,
I am in the exact same situation as you, my son just turned 15mths and for the past few months he's becoming so opinionated and demanding. He often shows his frustration by throwing and banging things in a very upset manner. He also bites...
I found The Secrets of Happy Children by the same author of Raising Boys (which i also like) to be very helpful in helping my husband and I get into the right mind frame. Like axptguy38 says, it's important to be firm and stand your ground. we've been doing this for the past month or so and it does seem to help. My son now knows that he's not going to be able to get his way. With the crying/tantrums we choose to wait it out, while saying in a calm stern voice "calm down", before it would take 10-15mins, but now within 5mins he's stopped crying and is ready to move on. Sometimes it's frustrating and tiring and i'll feel like giving in, that's when I find reading a few passages in the above book helpful to get me back into parent mode.
i also find being really repetitive and consistent helps a lot too. consistency in my own actions as well as my husband's.
Good luck!! who knew it would be like this???
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A couple of tips.
Don't say no, say yes, later. Barbara Coloroso recommends this trick and it works! Even with your husband! ;-)
If the baby bites, then give baby something he is allowed to bite. A dog chewy toy (new one) works well! It will also make them laugh...
And the more you push them away at this age, the more they cling. Give more hugs and assurances and this too shall pass...more quickly too!
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Haha thanks Ruth! actually my husband just suggested that last night so we will try it out.
lol and noted that more hugs are needed. I will have a 15mth old stuck to me along with my 6mth pregnant belly!! what a sight! I'm only 5'2" so you won't be able to see me under all the "kids"!!
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Hi goddess kali, how long has it been going on? My 14-mth old son also had several teeth coming in and unlike his normal happy self, all he wanted to do was cling, be held and easily threw screaming fits when he couldn't get things he wanted. I knew he was teething and constantly put both of his hands inside his mouth, so I just let him be and gave him lots of hugs. When he had screaming fits, I would just distract him with sth else and he forgets what he originally wanted. This lasted for 5 days and then that was it. Not sure if you are in similar situation or if your little one is starting to push your limits.
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Hi everyone, thanks for the tips and comments. It's comforting ina way to know that i am not alone and that baby hasnt become totally abnormal.
mumbloxy, i must say that he is improving these days. It went on for about two weeks at least (long enough to have me climbing walls, i can tell you) but he seems to be calming down, drooling less, eating more, and is off to exploring by himself without constantly clinging onto my legs.
ruth: as a rule i never push him away, but just putting him down so i could cook or use the loo was already an effort.
MML: wow! six months pregnant and a clingy, tantrum throwing toddler. It must be tough on you. yes mine bites as well... but it seems more as an expression of affection than anger. He'll bury his head in my shoulder and nip my neck when i'm least expecting it.
Who knew it would be like this is right!!!!
Axpatguy: it is really hard to not laugh in the midst of a temper tantrum. Mine in te middle of his tears, holds up a his index finger, looks very stern and goes ta-ta-ta-ta when he's angry.
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