Help! I need parenting guidance for my 5 & 8 yr old girls

Today was a tough day with the kids. First, my five year old had a full blown tantrum (because our helper put away some things in her room that she considered bedding for her dolls.)


Next, my eight year old refused to come when we had to go out. I felt that she had to come out since no one was home to stay with her and I had no one else to leave her with. I did not know what to do, so I ended up yelling and getting all unravelled.


Later on the same day, the kids refused to go to bed. When they were finally in their room, they began to fight because one girl wanted the A/C on and the other did not. Also, my five year old started another crying fit when she discovered that I took out the garbage. She usually likes to take out the garbage. She had another little fit today about pressing a button in an elevator.


These are all unfortunately, common types of incidences with my kids, but it just felt like today was jam packed with parenting challenges. And I simply did not know what to do.

When I tell the eight year old to go to her room for a time out she says "Yeah" with a happy smile.


I feel like a parenting mud mess.

Cara, thanks for your good advise. The funny thing is that I have used many of these techniques in the past. Yesterday, I felt worn and seem to have forgotten what to do. I need reminding from time to time. I guess I haven't been a mom long enough to have these things ingrained. Also, I do not have role model memories of constructive approaches.


I think I am going to print out your suggestions and post them on my refrigerator for reference. Thanks again.

Re: time out in her room being a treat. It doesn't really matter as the point of time out is exclusion. It's just as well she's happy to enjoy her room to herself as it will help calm things down and that's all you want: you don't want her to be miserable, do you? Just out of the way.

About the aircon, I would just set the rules myself: you decide it's too stuffy and a/c is needed. You're not favouring one child's desire, you're just making a ruling. Just don't turn it on too high. Mums are judges, too: you may not agree with them, but you have to go along with their final ruling.

My kids used to have the same argument about the bath temperature, A/C in the car, ladeeda. They were just trying to wind eachother up (and me) anyway, so I'd be the judge of what was acceptable, and that was that.