Fussy eater

My 18 months old boy has become a very fussy eater these last five days. Since he was born, he has been eating and drinking much lesser than his peers, but now the problem is getting worse. He is also underweight. On top of that he has started throwing tantrums. He could cry for about an hour just because we offer him a banana! I am currently recording what he eats and drinks so that I could show it to his pediatrician, but I welcome any suggestions and past experience that you may have.

he probabaly needs a check-up?

5 days is no biggie. Kids go through periods of fussiness.


- Maybe he's teething?

- Keep offering a healthy variety of foods.

- If any food leads to tantrums, take it off the menu for a week. He'll forget all about why he was mad.

- If a kid doesn't eat all the food groups on any given day, it's no biggie. It's an average over several days that counts.

- If he continues eating too little, of course talk to your pediatrician.

Yes, all the things that axpatguy38 said, but also remember that 18 months is when they start seriously trying to figure out what pushes your buttons, so try to really think through how you are reacting now as it can come back to bite you in the tuckus once the twos are in full bloom. For example, avoid the trap of giving him empty calorie filler foods because you are in a panic that he hasn't eaten anything in 3 days -- once they know that there is a possibility of oppositional behaviour leading to a reward, things can become unnecessarily difficult.


Another thing that you might want to try -- changing his schedule around a bit. Take 2-3 days and try to figure out if he has fussy times of the day -- these are likely to correspond with hunger and tiredness.


We found with my daughter that she actually eats/naps/behaves/sleeps much more smoothly if we don't give her any snacks throughout the day, move lunch and dinner up to early bird special times [she currently eats dinner at 4:30pm!] and then she gets a snack right before her bath. She had gone through a bit of a regression after her brother was born, and this turned it around literally overnight.

Thanks all. I finally went to see his doc and gave his feeding record. He suggested to buy two things: a timer and a trash can.


Every meal time, after I put him on his high chair and put the meal in front of him, I have to set the timer for 30 minutes. Anything remaining after 30 minutes has to go to the trash can in front of him. After that, he gets nothing to eat until the next meal time. If he asks for food in between, I need to show him that his food is already in the trash can. The doc also said that it is OK to let him be (without eating) for a week....


I am still debating with my hubby whether or not we will do the suggested way. And in the mean time, that little monster of mine is still very fussy!

If you decide to do this, make sure that you do it all the way -- 100% of the time. If you do it 95% of the time, it may totally backfire and make the issue worse, so make sure that you, your husband and anybody else who cares for your child understands and is willing to commit.


Think about addicted gamblers or people who stay in abusive relationships. It's not a question of intellectually knowing that they need to stop/get out; it's that we are hardwired to become addicted to intermittent rewards -- so if you win once in 100 slots or if your partner praises you or if one of your beloved adults gives you a snack once in a while even though you didn't eat your last meal, your brain's desire to beat the system overrides its logic.


Good luck!


Oh, another tip -- along with the timer and the trash can, give him his utensils and sit down with your own meal. Make eating his responsibility, not yours. With our 2yo, the rule of thumb that we use is that if she asks for a bite from our bowl, we fish out the bite of whatever she's eaten the least of lately -- on the theory that it just tastes better if it comes off of your parent's fork/chopsticks! Otherwise, we don't feed her at all.