Posted by
axptguy38
16 yrs ago
Agreed with cara: When door is closed and everyone is sleeping. As for the helper "in the background", I'm sure she sleeps every now and then. If she hears anything she's a big girl and can ignore what is going on.
If #1 is in the same room it works too. Just wait until he/she is asleep and try to keep it down.
If you are expecting sex to be preceded by a romantic candle-lit dinner, that might be expecting too much. Seize the opportunity for a quickie when it is presented. Speaking as a man I can say that most of us have no problem with having to hurry.
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"Speaking as a man I can say that most of us have no problem with having to hurry."
How true... hahahahah.
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"men don't care how long it takes so long as it happens regularly."
Damned straight. ;)
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really, when trying for a baby, there isn't much romance in it. i remember just keep at it until it happens. when u're 'force' to perform, there is very little romantic atmosphere that can be maintained. haha.
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As michelley says there isn't much romance in it. We did make a lot of jokes and laugh about the whole ridiculous situation as I recall. So it was fun, mostly. The important thing is to try not to take things too seriously. Few things can sour up a relationship like arguing about sex+pregnancy+kids. Keeping it fun may of course be hard if you keep trying and trying without success.
We didn't go for ovulation tests either. We knew the approximate days and would just "do it" at least once a day during those days.
The risk of waking the maid should be quite small. If one stays quiet I doubt the activity can be heard in the next room.
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yes, I agree "sex on demand" is not romantic!
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tpol
16 yrs ago
test tube baby.
Maid wouldn't know and will not affect #1 !!
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Expensive but of course an option.
I don't see how #1 is affected by the parents having sex anyway. I mean even if you are unlucky and get "caught" once or twice kids under 2-3 won't remember.
Any effect on #1 will be minuscule compared to the actual arrival of #2. ;)
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788
16 yrs ago
Why do you have to "try" at night? If you know your exact ovulation date- you can always check into a hotel for the midday! Or send the baby out for a walk in the morning before husband leaves for work!!:D
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Z
16 yrs ago
If you don't have a biological imperative, you might wait just a bit before TTC#2 -- about 3yo, kids suddenly start becoming much more independent, which will make everything much easier [imagine trying to fit feeding a newborn into your busy busy day right now...]
That being said, ours are 22 mo apart because we were laissez-faire wrt birth control after our first [well, we did try for almost 2 years before we caught her]. Plus, our first seemed to have a real knack for interrupting -- we used to joke about how she wanted to be an only child.
And I disagree about TTC definitely meaning no romance. We were never the candlelit dinner kind of people, but both of ours were definitely conceived under terribly romantic circumstances.
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I can only speak for us but we didn't have any difficulty with conceiving #2. Second "window" we tried, if you will.
If you wait until you are "ready", you never will be. As I see it, better to get on with it and get the baby years out of the way. As you say you've already lost the "freedom and time". #2 won't make you lose them all over again. Sure, having two is more demanding than having one, but it doesn't take twice as long. Now that our girls (18 months apart) are a bit older, it's nice not to have one who can handle herself somewhat, plus a baby who can't do anything. They play together nicely most of the time, and so some of that time and freedom has come creeping back.
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