Bad influence woes.

Hi


My child has recently been misbehaving on the school bus. We have removed him from the school bus because of the latest incident. The short of the long is, the bus mother told us that he spat at her.


We were livid that he was so rude! That night before bed, we talked to him and the conversation went like this:


Me - Why did you spit at the bus mother?

Him - Because X is my friend.

Me - What do you mean?

Him - X is my friend so I did it.

Me - You did it because X is your friend?

Him - Yes. He asked me to do it.

Me - !!! (In total schock)


This is not the first time the friend he mentioned has influenced him negatively. In another instance, he has also gotten into trouble. So my poor son who has always demonstrated a strong sense of loyalty to his mates are doing what his 'friend' is asking him to do.


We have stopped him from meeting/playing with the friend outside school and taken him off the bus. I'm wondering too if I should inform his teacher or the 'friend's' parent about the boy's behaviour.


Would it be too harsh or seem petty to approach them about the problem?

First of all, how old is your son?


I would inform the teacher, yes. Start by talking to him/her about the incident(s) and whether to contact the parents of the other kid.

He's in K2.

This is actually a lovely teaching opportunity - about how your kid can also influence his friend and when "friend" tells him to do something that he knows is wrong, it is his job to lead by good example, and that it is okay to say something like "don't be ridiculous! Only a street urchin would spit at the bus mother!" It won't work very often, but if you wait until he is a teenager to discuss peer pressure it will be quite late.

Thanks Z! That is actually great advice! I will be trying that!