Dear all, l really appreciate your honest advice. First, my big respect to all mothers and fathers. After a few years of marriage we are now considering making a family. Truthfully lve never had a big desire to have children, although l do like them and once a month recently get a deep hormonal urge and am drawn to babies. As now in my 30s pretty much all my friends have children and they are always pushing me to do it saying its 'amazing'. The thing is though, lm not sure lm buying it... since having babies they all seem to have forgotten about who they were before, have lost their freedom (and free time) and kind of dispise their husbands (who they previously adored). It is really sad to see friends like this...yet all saying how 'amazing' children are and that you should do it too?! It seems to have been kind of a trade for everything they had before. I cannot find one example of a woman happier post kids (with her husband and life) than before?
I love my husband so deeply. We laugh together, sleep in, travel, hatch fun plans, work out, spoil our pets, have our careers, get dressed up and go for dinners etc. I am so scared this all has to stop when having children? As l cant talk openly to my friends (they are in full mummy mode) l googled and found dozens of sites like these that make motherhood sound like a jail sentance that no one admits to.
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So l would like to honestly know, is it possible to still have your old peaceful life plus have children here in HK? Consider that in HK with full time help, maybe a nanny/night nanny we could possibly have A LOT more support than the women in that blog post. I know some people are quick to judge mothers (fathers too) that have a lot of hired help. I think that as long as there is a lot of love and disipline it is ok if balanced.
We have a lot of love to offer children but l am very scared and do not believe it is worth trading the relationship with my husband and my hard earned freedom. Is it possible to have both? If so and you have it, how did you do it? Please do share. Thank you for your kind and honest answers.