Posted by
nirizawa
20 yrs ago
Any advice on how to avoid letting strangers touch my baby when we go out? I know they absolutely love babies here, and I live in an area with tons of babies/mothers. Every time we venture out there always seems to be someone wanting to touch my daughter's hand or face. How to stop this??
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@@
20 yrs ago
Drives me crazy! I can't tell you how sick my kid got on a trip to Vietnam and I really think it was due to people constantly grabbing at him - after one day his face was black!
With my youngest I always use a net over the stroller when travelling and if she's in my arms I try to politely move peoples hands away.
FOTH I can't imagine you'd enjoy having strangers come up and touch your face all of the time, really no different for children, my son hates it and these days he tends to let people know - although if someone asks him nicely he'll happily oblige photos!
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tly
20 yrs ago
I couldn't help laughing out loud reading this thread. When we lived in Shanghai there were tons of people wanting to touch our son. People there just don't seem to take their babies out. Anyways, my hubby always got soooo pissed off when the locals wanted to touch our kid. My hubby didn't care what the locals thought when he rudely pushed their hands away or snap at them when the hands start reaching into the pram. It may be rude, but for the health of your child, you need to risk it. And honestly, it really is health related. My husband was walking home from work one day when he saw a guy blow his nose with his bare hands, wipe it on a tree and proceed to open the door to a bank with the same hand. Imagine that hand then proceeds to touch your child! I just had to laugh coz after manuvering your pram to avoid hands all day long, you either get totally pissed at everyone, or just laugh.
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I find that particularly rude also. I did not experience this upon my children since we're ethnic Chinese, but it was a very bad experience when I went out with a Caucasian friend of mine. My wife and I ended up having to snap at and tell the people off.
The excuse? "Oh, they're so cute!" But have they ever thought of the kind of distress they're bringing to the people?
Sigh...you don't see such things in Singapore, where we're 70% of Chinese descent! Or even in Thailand, for that matter. Nor in Malaysia or Indonesia. Sigh...only in China...
Michael Chan
www.senseimichael.com
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mosquito netting doesn't work ... iwas standing inline at immigration with my 3 week old baby. by this time i had bought a mosquito net to cover my pram beacasue i was so sick of strangers touching my baby. This woman stanidng in front of me pushed her hand UNDER the netting picked up my childs pacifier and put it back in his mouth!!!!!
and my child isn't even fair (so we don have the blonde excuse.) i soon learnt why it is that local girls dont take their babies out of the house for the first month....
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My daughter isn't that fair skinned--she's half Japanese...Anyhow, I want her to spend more time outdoors, not just when I'm racing around with her in the stroller doing errands. I don't like always walking around at such a brisk pace--I'd like to get to know other moms here, but imagine it will be hard to make neighborhood friends if I am always pushing people away. I just don't want to compromise her health. I suppose I will start using the mosquito net more often, and learn to keep people's hands away from her somehow. What is particularly troublesome is that they grab her hand, which then inevitably ends up in her mouth!! Yes, Foth, I can't imagine that you'd enjoy people grabbing your face and hands all day!
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laughs at reading this. citypeople!
go ahead and make a greenhouse plant out of your kid......as if that will protect him/her, no in the contrary it will just worsen it!
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Honestly, your child is going to get exposed to germs even without being touched. Why not make sure you keep wipes with you, if you feel very strongly about other people's dirty hands? I don't find people are that bad here - I have a (very cute, of course...) gwai-baby, and most people are very polite - ask if they can touch him, and if I say he's a bit tired they accept it. But normally I let them go ahead. Think about when your child plays with other children later - how many germs do you think he'll get then?
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@@
20 yrs ago
I don't just think about germs but the invasion of personal space. My kids are really outgoing and friendly, lots of hugs etc with friends and family but they just don't like strangers grabbing at them and I can understand that, they aren't dolls or toys but people who have a right to be left alone if they choose.
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I feel a positive remark is missing in this thread! I think it is actually quite wonderful at how people are so enthusiastic about babies and small children here. I think all the attention my baby gets here in HK when we go out shopping is fantastic for his social skills. At the same time, while the shop assistants are playing with him and keeping him occupied I get to browse the shop :)I'll keep a wet wipe handy to wipe off anything I think needs wiping off afterwards...
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I think if we want to survive in HK (socially, of course), somehow have to get used to the overly-friendly gesture from the locals. Get plenty of wipes!!
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True, true. I do like the social interaction, and I agree with bluesky about shopping and the assistants keeping baby occupied. I am just a worried, first-time mom who will start using my wipes instead of worrying about every germ. But what I do see around my neighborhood are babies with holes in their pants so they can "go" anywhere. Is this common everywhere in China??
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Who's buying all these diapers and wipes I see in the shops?? Surely I'm not the only one!
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If you don't want people to touch your children then stand in front of the pram when they approach so they can smile and pull faces at your child but can't touch. No need to be rude to or get stressed out about it. I have a 2 year old and a 5 month old and find that my approach works fine. I take pleasure out of the fact that people think my kids are cute and have no problems with people taking an interest. Only thing I don't like is when people take pictures of them without asking which happens a lot at Ocean Park with those annoying mobile phones - wouldn't mind if people asked!
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vw
20 yrs ago
Have to agree with Hetfield about the photographs. That is one thing that makes me very annoyed. Most times when they ask, I politely decline. It is very frustrating when the person tries to then get a sneaky click with the mobile once you have moved on.
As far as touching children go, I have experienced this all around the world and in fact found it worse in Rome than I have found it in any Asian country. I try not to get too distressed by it as I think that human touch is a lovely unspoken communication and must admit my kids are not always squeaky clean themselves!
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sub
20 yrs ago
I agree with the mums less comfortable with strangers touching their kids. Even back in Aust I hated it when people touched my newborn's hands becasue the baby always puts the same hand straight in their mouth. In China it is so much worse. I can understand people being a bit more cavalier with their older children, but please, little babies get sick easily and it is just awful when they do.
Now that my babies are 2 and 4 I still don't like it but am not so worried about the health aspect. I try to walk as fast as possible past people to stop the touching but I notice now my girls start to turn their faces away or hands to protect themselves. I have always tried to be polite and never rude (prefer to try to teach the girls how to handle the situation without rudeness) but I just hate it!!!! I have never liked people I don't know well touching me, it is just an upbringing thing, perhaps, but not everyone liks to be felt up by strangers....and no cuddles..OK? (other little kids excepted)
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Actually Neuilly I do wash my hands often through out the day and I have to say if i have been out to shops or even to car to pick kids up again come home and wash hands. I know where my hands have been but your I don't so really don't want then touching my kids. Now do you understand!!!
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