Unused embryos - what to do?

We have two left over embryos from our IVF process and now that we already have three kids, the chances of us using them is very slim.


I've been given three choices. Donate them to an infertile couple, donate to research or dispose of them.


I'm in a dilemma on what is the "right" thing to do. I'm not sure how comfortable we will be to donate them to another couple knowing there is another one of our kid out there, or what our donated "kid" will think of us in future when he/she is old enough to know. Then donating to research or dispose, that's also very difficult ethically.


I'm just wondering what others who have been through the same thing have done and what were your thoughts when you made the decisions you did.


No negative comments please from those who have been fortunate enough not to need IVF in their lifetime.


TIA.

Hello,


I read a story on the Daily Mail recently about this couple who gave away their eggs (I don't think it was an actual embryo) and even though there are confidentiality rules, they ended up having a lovely relationship with the women who donated her eggs. She's like an "auntie" or second mother even.


I agree that is a difficult decision though.


Then if the choice is just between disposal or research, it would be much better to choose research. Don't think about what might be done... think about the benefits to medicine and science. Anyway, there's no hurry to reach a decision, right? You can keep them as they are for the time-being?

We face the same dilemma. It's an angonizing choice, but we are leaning toward donation to an infertile couple. Check out Snowflakes Donation program website for lots of information on this. There are also lots of resources on the www.embryodonation.org site. Yes, it is weird wondering about another family raising 'your' child, but the child would be adopted and have a life, versus the other options. Good luck.