Hi, I haven't even been trying that long (so some of you will quite rightly be annoyed by this...sorry) but even after just three months I already feel sort of driven crazy by the whole TTC process. Tense, obsessive, occasionally exhibiting a serious sense-of-humor failure. I feel like life right now revolves around waiting to ovulate and then more waiting to see the outcome. I work and I'm very busy...so it's not that I'm not doing/thinking of other things...I just can't seem to view anything else as quite as important as this. Any advice from others in the same boat? Any distractions or ways to "just relax about it" that seem to really work? Thanks.
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Wishing and hoping,
I know what you mean. Nothing else seems to matter anymore - just ovulation and the wait. It is so tough. I am a professional and work anywhere between 12 to 14 hours a day - but I still have tons of time to think about this. Finally, two months ago, I decided I needed a hobby in order to stop just thinking about babies....
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When i was working a very stressful job and doing 12 - 14hrs a day and TTC, I wasn't very successful at TTC and also obsessive and stressed.....two months after i gave up my job i got pregnant...once i had kind of thought oh well it might not happen at all..
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I answered a similar post to this a few days ago, that lady had been trying for 6mths, when your trying for a baby that you so much want then 3mths can seem like a life time. I tried for ages but i have PCO so i can relate to being obsessive about it all but as the goddess mentioned stress is huge and you might want to consider dropping some hours at work. I agress having people say "just relax" is frustating but is important. Try to go for massages or yoga or some nice relaxing walks. I would worry about any medical reasons yet incase your starting to think along those lines. Would you be due for a holiday some times it does do the trick. Good luck and i'm always willing to hear you vent your frustations if you need to.
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Perthites, Goddess Kali, Havefaith:
Thanks very much for your kind responses and sound advice. I try not to worry out loud too much to family and friends, so just knowing that there are others to "talk" to, and who understand, is a great help.
Goddess kali: I have been following your progress on other threads...wish you all the best. : )
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wishing and hoping -
it is hard waiting? All the work that goes into it and then waiting.
I suggest you do something that you really love - something that you won't be able to do after you get pregnant - and enjoy it to keep your mind off of other things. Getting pregnant is not the ONLY thing that matters in your life - you live a full life with your husband and friends - and a great city full of crazy things to do. DO them.
I picked up knitting and crochet while pregnant - went out, bought some needles and taught myself off of the internet. Made some cute stuff for friends and still have YET to make anything for any of my kids.
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Wishing and hoping,
Best of luck! I hope we will both have some good news in the near future. Meanwhile, keep busy and pick a hobby. Something that will take your mind of this....
Havefaith
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Wishing and Hoping: Thanks very for your good wishes.
So few women are lucky and get pregnant without planning to or just as soon as they decide to.
And telling your hubby - we've GOT to do it tonight sometimes takes all the fun out of it.....
but it will happen for you..don't worry. And i think it's great that there is this forum where we can unburden ourselves without having friends and relatives going - oh do we have to listen to you talk about this AGAIN???!!
Keeping my fingers crossed for you :))
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Handy tip! To take the edge off the despair and disappointment every month when I found i wasn't pregnant I'd plan something to do, or a treat, that I wouldn't have been able to have if I had been pregnant. one month I got my hair dyed. Another month I booked a flight for a visit home (long-haul so wouldn't have wanted to go if I had been pregnant). Needn't be big or expensive. Popping out for a glass of wine with friends/husband can do the trick. helped keep things a bit more in perspective in my case so when the next month rolled around it wasn't so bad. I had something to think about and look forward to that wasn't about getting pregnant!
I'm not sure if that will help or not, but it's worth a try. I think your response is pretty normal. We're so used to being in control of our lives that it's really hard to accept when something is so out of our control. Normally if we decide we want to do something, we just do it. I thought it would be like that with getting (and staying) pregnant. How naive was I?!?
Anyway, best of luck ;)
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tennis gal i was TTC while in HK and i was flat out with Dr's appointments (mine was an infertility issue) and the rest of the time keep busy with activites thur the Aust Ass. I had friends with the American a** too so i would some times go to their activities. I also loved to do craft so although i wasn't working i could be quite busy i wasn't a lunchon type of girl so i could keep busy without spending loads of money. The coffee mornings for the Aust and American Ass are free and you can go as a non menber. The YWCA has some great courses also.
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Well, I gave up my job, but I haven't really stopped working. At the moment I'm earning less - but hopefully this will be only in the short term start-up phase.
I've opened my own company and am dealing with just one client so far - so have a lot less to do than i did before. He supplies products for a supermarket and we do the sourcing and order follow up for him.
Now it looks like we'll be getting another client soon.
I am also plotting and planning to start making organic toiletries...
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Hi Wishing and Hoping,
I have just been looking at threads and noticed this one. It does drive you nuts doesn't it??! After my just conceiving and then losing all within 3 days, the frustration is unbelievable isn't it? I can barely contain myself to get my period over with so I can try again. Now I am sitting her thinking, ok perhaps the whole relax and treat your body well etc etc thing might have a point. It is so hard to think of anything else. I am going to try and keep myself busy with day to day life and try to just enjoy sex and life and focus as much as possible on other things. I know this probably doesn't help much, but all we can do is hang in there, I guess.... and one day soon it will just happen and all will be good. (Am trying really hard to be positive! - glass half full....)
Wishing you all the best.
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