Posted by
Dream
18 yrs ago
I am in love with a man who is getting divorce...
We met 1 and half year ago in a party, he was separated from his wife at that time. We were hanging out as friends and then we started dating....He said he wants a new relationship and he is ready to move on.....
We like each other, had spent some good time together but when our relationship was getting into another level( feeling closer...) he started to feel confused and wondering whether we should continue to see each other...
He said he can't handle a new relationship and a divorce at the same time.
I don't understand what happend.... Scared ?
I still like him and but I don't know what to do.
(I am based in Singapour)
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Why did the guy get separated from his wife? The reason could be something to do with his guilt/reluctance to move on. And when he realised he was so close to getting/asking for a divorce, the separation/cause probably hit him all over again.
Second, does he have kids?
Third, it could be that he has found someone else!
So just talk to him and find out what is in his mind.
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Give him enough space. He was upfront in admitting that he cannot handle a new relationship and a divorce at the same time. Respect that.
In the meantime, continue being friends, offer your support but don't let you life and schedule revolve aroud his.
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I caught my wife having an affair. And, after I filed for divorce, I found out she was a bigamist. But, it still cost me US$35000 over three years.
Was I ready to find a mate 1.5 years after that? Yes, but not for marriage. Even now, I am looking for an LTR first to make sure everything is right.
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"And when he realised he was so close to getting/asking for a divorce, the separation/cause probably hit him all over again."
Spot on I think. After separating you can get to a point where you honestly believe you've worked through everything and it's all behind you. Then something takes you right back to square one and opens the wounds again - the formal step of a divorce, ex finding someone else, ex/kids moving away....
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