It just takes time hun. I know that's not the best answer but it's the only one.
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Time will heal the pain, how long the time you need depends on how deep is your love and how long the relationship was, you will never forget the one you love just like we'll never forget our first love, first kiss, but ultimately, you won't feel the pain/hurt/anger anymore when you think about them. Good luck and stay strong...
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Time is all you need. All your attempts to distract yourself in order to feel better will not amount to much.
Time and agreeing not to go too hard on yourself.
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I had this chest pain experience two years ago, at that time, I even can't help to cry in front of my colleauges.
I asked myself, how long will it take me to forget the guy? 6 months? a year? or even longer? Then, I realized that I would never do it because it is part of my life. However, believe me, the feeling of pain and hurt diminish as time pass for sure. Forcing yourself to forget someone will turn out forcing yourself to think of him/her, so, don't do that. What should you do? Doing sports, which is good to your health, sticking to your hobbies, which can occupy your time with fun. Meeting new friends, they will bring you new idea.
Be brave, keep yourself with super high spirit, make up, dress up, live happier than before. Relax and everything will be fine. Good luck.
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FIFIB
12 yrs ago
It takes time but I can promise you one day you won't even remember why this person was so important to you.
I had a relationship that took me 5 years to forget. He was always calling me on my BD, X'mas would visit me on his holidays but never proposed and I knew always he would never do it.
One day I decided I had just have enough and decided to take him out of my life. Started therapy with a psychologist. I remember one day the therapist opened my eyes: I was so excited because this guy had called me for my BD but he told me, why are you so happy. Thas was a call where you lost in every way.
He called you when he wanted and he finished the conversation when he wanted.
It was truth and worst it was always like that.
Anyway during the period that I took the therapy I met my husband, got married within 6 months and we just celebrated our 10th weeding anniversary.
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Like others have said, you can't forget someone you love, and honestly why would you want to forget something that was good? time will heal the pain.
Start taking better care of yourself, your confidence, your looks, you will attract new people and be surprised that actually you can get something better than what you lost.
And love lost is freedom regained.I was devastated after a break-up (in fact prior to it also) this year. Now I don't know what on earth I was thinking. You'll be fine.
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Yes, he calls just because he wants, he text just because he wants, he asks for meeting just because he wants. You are happy with his calls, but you fell upset when he doesn't call. You know, it is sooo tired and exhausted to wait for calls or messages or meetings. However, you don't know why you have this kind of patience.
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Well I am not sure if its "patience" so much as it is "nothing better going on".
A lot of folks stay in a relationship that is going nowhere or not great simply because its better (in their mind) than having no relationship at all. This is how the years go by until one day the relationship ends because one or the other has found something better and then the realization that their best years have gone by and they are left at past their sell-by date...dawns on em.
OP - head to the gym, or if you don't have a membership, get your trainers on and go out walking an hour each day, you will find this not only works as "meditation" but it also helps combat depression, which no doubt it whats contributing to you feeling down and out.
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Consider it a chapter in your life. It doesnt need to be forgotten.. no matter how pleasant or painful it was.
Life is dull when it becomes static, we need to keep moving.. whether its within a current relationship, or by starting a new relationship.. or simply moving forward on our own. Do all the activities that interest you.. set youreself goals that you want to achieve in life..
Enjoy, and look forward to the times ahead... a new start, a new adventure, a new chapter in your life.
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The basic truth is that you have to embrace what happened as part of your life, as part of you, and then move forward to look to new experiences and loves and friendships. Time will heal the pain, and the future will provide you with new loves and joys.
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oofy
12 yrs ago
Do not suppress your thoughts, think as much as you want about the past be nostalgic, allow the pain to wash over you as often as you want, wallow and remember the good times together, cry and feel sorry for yourself whenever you feel like it. Even if you try to do this each day forever more you will find it impossible to do so, your brain will heal the pain, you will wonder what you saw in this person and without effort you will be free, so dont do anything except immerse yourself in this painful part of being human, but believe me you wont be able to keep it up each day because without effort you will naturally move on with your life.
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I agreed with badnstupid and xpatwilier, I had a very similar experience.
Keep trying to avoid the thinkingor keep distracting yourself isn't gonna help. I'd tried to go on a holiday, hang out with friends, watched a sad movie to cry the hell....but none of these helps, it lasted for a year for me. I got lucky as get stuck with my family thing, and then just as I thought the pain is still there, then I got a job change...
Like all others mentioned, it's in you and always be. And I'm not afraid of thinking about him and there is no pain anymore, sometimes I feel great of having these moments with him.
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in case you never realized, OP posted 300 days back
she would have moved on by now and hooked up with a new man.
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crxuk
12 yrs ago
Haha Scorpio, you nailed it..
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hey i have been there , guess most of us have been there also !
i Know how u feel ...(!?) feel lonely when u stay home but have no motivate to hang out ...
but u know what u have to force urself to hang out with frds ..
force urself to smile once a day maybe before ur shower front of the mirror !!! ( really it works !) i know it sounds stupid ..
But , u dont have to pretend u r happy .
cry like hell and release ur emotion ...
meet some new frds ...etc
dont stay home alone for too long coz somehow ppl enjoy the feeling of self-pity , and DONT !
hey u r good and cheer up .
probably u think i m bullshit-ing but really , most of us know how it feel and what else i can say - RIP (ur last relationship)
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