Ask her out, or go hiking?



ORIGINAL POST
Posted by cybersprocket 19 yrs ago
OK, it's valentines day... noon... I have no date... I have a friend, who has a roommate that I have a little crush on. Friend tells me her roommate has no plans for tonight. I think she is smart, creative and cute, but up to this point, though I have met her in a group setting several times, she has shown no particular interest in me.


Should I invite her to dinner?


If she says no, seems like it will be weird when I go to visit my friend... if she says yes, is it just a sympathy date? Am I over thinking this? (Already know the answer to that is YES).


Option 2, if I don't ask her out is to organize a singles, full moon walk up to the top of the peak. I'd make Gluwein (Hot, German spiced red wide)and invite other unattached AX'ers to go. Meet at 9:00pm, walk up, see the view, sip some gluwien. Better than a sharp stick in the eye.


Your vote/thoughts?


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COMMENTS
Pritt 19 yrs ago
Definitely vote for the hiking option.

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shaq 19 yrs ago
No pain, no gain ...... you'll never know her answer until you ask her. There's no harm in trying, so go ahead and ask her for dinner. Men are 'floored' all the time in the dating-thing, but that's what makes us men; you live to fight again.


Sympathy date or not, who cares, if she says yes??????


SHAQ

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cybersprocket 19 yrs ago
uhhh, yeah... i'd cook dinner for sure. I have no interest in going out. Not to mention, I am a good cook, and most women appreciate a good, home cooked meal. :)

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lammasita 19 yrs ago
It's raining CS!! Gluwein would be yummy in this cold, wet, very english type weather... but how many people do you think we'll trip over making out in the darkness up there??!!


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cybersprocket 19 yrs ago
Lammasita, i have no idea, but at least I won't be sitting home alone on valentines day, wishing i had a date. I'll be at the peak, drinking all the gluwein myself, wishing I had a date.


;) will you come if I do the hike? which is currently in the lead, by the way.

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shaq 19 yrs ago
Yeah! Ask her, and cook for her @ home. Man, that'll be soooooo lovely :P.


Come on, JC, give consumerism a break :D.


SHAQ

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lammasita 19 yrs ago
A rainy walk.... sounds tempting, not very attractive making, but tempting all the same


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lammasita 19 yrs ago
leave the lady at home... do your own thing, but don't think of having no date... look at it as freedom!!


You are free to do what you want!!

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lammasita 19 yrs ago
oh yes! forgot that for a second...

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mafie d 19 yrs ago
Asking a girl out on valentines day could be slightly dodgy.

Why don't you ask her out on the hiking trip casually and then if all goes well in your charming approaches then invite her somewhere for a casual drink/meal/hot night of passion.


Then if she's says no you're not embarrased and it's not weird with your friend and if she says yes then its all good. Plus do chicks not dig moonlit walks?

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Funnybaby 19 yrs ago
well hiking in the evening? Not too good.


Cyber> i think you keep the dates in another time, it is a bit sensitive and you really ask a bit of short notice. The girl will turn you down becauise 1. she might have a date. 2. she feel strange to go for a date with a new "friend" in a funny day like "Valentine's day".


Better leave it and date me sometime! hahaahha...

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cybersprocket 19 yrs ago
OK, situational update... somewhere, I found some guts, and asked her out. I did it via email (hey, i only found a little pile of guts, not a huge one)... so, i will keep you all informed... and when I post that invitation to go hiking tonight, you'll all know what the answer was. ;)

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voiceofreason 19 yrs ago
aaaarrrrrgh! cybersprocket!!! if you were a male friend of mine, or my son, i'd put you in a headlock and give you the biggest noogie, which you deserve for all this overthinking and waffling, have a good laugh at your expense, then sit you down and tell you to pay attention.


since it's already past noon, call her and say "sorry for the short notice but could i interest you in dinner tonight? i'm cooking. if not tonight, how about another night?" whatever she says, you'll have your answer once and for all.


then go on that hike.


;-D


but seriously. would you just ASK HER ALREADY. don't think so much! you have no idea what her answer will be. and in case she says no to both dining alternatives, any residual awkwardness whenever you visit your friend will come from you, not her.


please note that i have not mentioned the V-word once in tis posting. you're just adding pressure by overlaying this whole enterprise with the goal of "not being alone on V-day". you WON'T be alone later. you'll either be cooking for your crush, or putting a future date with her in your calendar (or not), before going on your hike with whatever nutty but supportive AX'ers that are willing to go on a rainy moonlight-and-gluwein hike. ;-)

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cybersprocket 19 yrs ago
Ahhh VOR, you are a wise woman. For now, I have taken the road of the more gutless. Let's see what the reply to the email is.

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cybersprocket 19 yrs ago
Hey... nem... now you're cross polinating my neurotic date thread!!! Go hold your breath in the hypoxic chamber in the other thread. :P


Funnybaby... welp, depening on how my invitation turns out, it may be just you and me, kid. The response to the hike idea hasn't been overwhelming either!

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lulu 19 yrs ago
well, even i would like to go on a date tonight, I would avoid meeting anyone tonight cos it is so embarrassing...


*hide & cry in bed*

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cybersprocket 19 yrs ago
Nem... OY! bad choice of words. Happy cross pollination... wink wink nudge nudge! ;)

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lammasita 19 yrs ago
CS - your idea of full moon walking is a great one! Just timed wierdly...


can we all breath yet or has she still not picked up her email??

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flabbergasted 19 yrs ago
what are chaps?


I find chaps wearing.

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cybersprocket 19 yrs ago
haha, how did we get onto chaps? if you live in san francisco, and go to the folsom street fair, you can wear those chaps with nothing else, and fit right in!


Lamma... no answer yet. Sigh.

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lammasita 19 yrs ago
This is so funny!


Tutti - I thought you were talking about spats!!! I had this really wierd image... come to think of it, it wouldn't be very different if everyone were wearing chaps too!!


What made you think of that anyway!???


CS - I've had to start breathing again, I was beginning to convulse...

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flabbergasted 19 yrs ago
actually lamma, I was thinking along those lines as well...


and for more amusement...


bizarre celebrations


http://smh.com.au/news/world/bizarre-celebrations/2006/02/14/1139679572264.html

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lammasita 19 yrs ago
I saw! A little strange...


don't see how a sign would invoke further passion for a couple..


I mean, they have to read the words in order to feel them???


WTF!!!

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lammasita 19 yrs ago
Worn like that they could get you arrested around here!! Then you'll be stuck with the only other option of singing the "jailhouse rock'!!

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cybersprocket 19 yrs ago
So who is up for that full-moon, in the rain, gluwien hike?


Yep, the verdict is in... thanks but no thanks. A very kind, thoughtful reply explaining that she already committed to a singles gathering with work friends. And more importantly, although she professes to be looking for a new boyfriend, he heart belongs to a guy from overseas, and until she gets over him, new relationships just are not that important to her.


But, the good news is, there seems to be no residual weirdness, and in fact invited me to join her work colleagues and roomie later for a drink. I don't think I’ll go, but it was a nice gesture.


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lammasita 19 yrs ago
ooooooh!


...the penny just dropped...


sorry for the 'blonde' moment tutti!

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Funnybaby 19 yrs ago
Cyber> hiking's a bit heavy for a rainy weekday. May be one sunny weekend would be nice.


Think its good that she invite you for a drink as well, at least she replied! I send some text out this morning to the guy i fancy..but NOTHING.


oh well....


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lammasita 19 yrs ago
CS - that was lucky - she sounds like a diplomat, great answer she gave...


The idea of a walk at full moon, under the stars, on top of a hill with warming drunk-making Gluwein sounds great, but this is Hong Kong...


..the moon won't be in sight as the Peak spends most of it's time in cloud cover, the rain, although falling gently today, will pish down on us all and the wind will whip up to topple someone down the side of the mountain.

Am I right, or just a cynic??


I have plans of steak and great company... you got me all inspired CS!!

Why not arrange it for another night and then I can bring my dogs too, they would love it!!

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cybersprocket 19 yrs ago
Lamma... It does seem that mother nature is conspiring to make my moonlight hike less pristine than i had imagined. I have made many a hike in the rain and snow, but it takes the edge off of what I had intended for tonight. Maybe we can organize a repeat next month at the full moon.




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lammasita 19 yrs ago
Full moons = wildness!!


Have you never witnessed it?


I'm up for hikes (hate that word for some reason) anytime, most places, with select people!!


Sounds like a date!! (for want of a better word)

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