Need help deciphering japanse-english communication (and message)

Recently, my Japanese friend hurt her back. I was chatting with her via SMS on the way back from a business trip when I learned about here injury. I have a bit of a crush on her, and we have flirted on several occasions, but that’s it. Here’s the relevant part of the conversaion.


Her: No Problem! I am bored just at home. Suddenly pain attached me when I pick something dropped on the floor. So bad… Maybe getting old 


Me: Since you are stuck at home and bored, can I offer to bring you some dinner or DVD??? I feel bad you are stuck at home all alone with sore back!


Her: Haha, maybe 


Me: Well, I'm on the ferry from Shenzhen now. Will arrive in sheng wan at 7:00pm. Let me know what you’d like. Could get take out or cook something for u. U choose.


Her: Thank you for your offer! But better after recovered from my back!!


Me: No worries. Get some rest and feel better. Please let me know if u need help shopping or anything. Happy to help out. Have nice evening.


Question is, what did she mean? “Haha, maybe ” Did she WANT me to come visit her, or was she just being polite? was I supposed to be more insistent? Or did she just change her mind? I'm definitely bad at reading the implied message from women, and in this case, I truly have no idea what she really meant.


Anyone ideas? What would you have done/said in my situation?


Thanks in advance for the advice.

Hrm... it's still clear as mud...


She has been in HK several years. When she said 'haha...maybe" i thought she meant yes. So when I offered to make arrangements she said no. So I was a little confused. I think i am still a little confused.


I guess I just have to sit tight and see what the future holds.

'Thank you for your offer! But better after recovered from my back!!' definitely a Thank you but No Thank you.


Lived in Japan for 5 years and what always confused me was their indirect,polite ways of saying 'no', be it in business, friendship or relationship.. Now I've learnt that only a firm yes means yes..

I will say keep trying and there's a chance.


well, there's very sweet that u offer to take care of her and keeping her acompany. but as a girl I would say. I prefect to see a man who I like in the best condition. not when my back is hurting and have no energy to make myself look good ! Hey, don't forget she's Japanese. Appearance are very improtant !!!

MC - yes, i got the same impression as you. the NO was clear, but the "maybe" was unclear. Hence my confusion.


Wonderfulday - good point about wanting to make a nice appearance. I was just thinking of being kind and helping someone who could not go out or go to work. Didn't think that maybe she is embarrased to see me that way.


Alas, seems she was not upset or angry with me, and I was not impolite, so I will just hope that we have another chance to see each other in the future. :D

cyber, dear. She just did not fancy meeting you this time. True, girls really do not want any dates when they are in a bad condition.


Wait until she back to good shape and ask for a proper date. Somehow for a asian girl, some stranger visit her place and cook dinner sounds a bit too much as well.

No biggy, my friend, and this has nothing to do with where your 'babe' comes from!! Girls, will always be girls and we like/love it when they do their 'thing' :D. It makes us want them more .. isn't it? Of cuz, when they do it well :P.


If you really like her, try again when she's well. Good luck!


ShaQ