Posted by
Imma Star
18 yrs ago
Some consider a casual first date with another gal/guy as cheating (no intimacy involved), but some think only shagging does. If the former definition takes the lead then no wonder everyone's cheating! It's so easy to.
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If your partner has asked you not to have one-on-one interaction with friends of the opposite sex, and you do it anyway, without telling them, then it's cheating.
On the other hand, if your partner has told you they don't care if you have sex with someone else, then when you do it, it's not cheating.
You just have to establish exactly where the line is, and then not cross it.
Personally, I wouldn't want my girlfriend to have a "date" with a guy under 2 circumstances:
1) She knows he wants to sleep with her.
2) She knows she may become interested in him as more than a friend.
As long as she doesn't meet someone under the above two situations, I don't mind if she has breakfast, lunch, or dinner with another man. I have enough confidence in her love of me that I know she won't do anything inappropriate otherwise.
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T3's hit it, if you're partner happened to see you, or overhear you, would it all be hunkydory? If you're having a meal with another girl/guy, could she saunter up and join you?
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The above two posts are on the money.
The point is, there's no point in arguing with your partner what cheating is. If your partner considers it cheating, then it's cheating. Once you start arguing with your partner about whether you cheated or not, you've lost. Might as well break up.
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SueOZ
18 yrs ago
What about texting your beautiful and sexy to another woman is that cheating?? I have just found a text with that to another woman. Not the first time he has messaged some random woman.
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"What about texting your beautiful and sexy to another woman is that cheating?"
In most cases, I would think so, that is, if you consider it to be...
"If your partner considers looking at others, cheating, does that make it so?"
Well, first of all, I think a partner that would consider that cheating is a bit screwed up, but... if you promised not to do it, and do it anyway, then yes, it is.
Personally, if I was with a partner that considered that cheating and responded by more than a playful pinch on the cheek, I probably wouldn't be with that partner very long... LOL.
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I don't think flirting=cheating. It can lead to cheating, yes..
In general, if the activity involves intentional dishonesty and deception, it is cheating.
If you can do something openly in front of your partner (flirt with another person, talk with an ex, ogle the gorgeous dude/dudette beside you..) without malice, then it is not cheating. But that's my definition. To each his own, I guess..
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tig
18 yrs ago
flirting will lead to cheating. Why need to flirt?
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@@
18 yrs ago
Dr. Phil defines infidelity as “whatever you would not do with your spouse beside you”
Sounds like pretty good advice to me.
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Hmm, ok, but what if he's lying next to you in bed and your mind is on 'other things'? say for example, some major fantasy involving the postman and a couple of char siu baus (ok, not MY postman, he's a little old!), is that ok? Many women fantasize (as I'm sure men do too) during and after plenty of luurrrve from their partners. You wouldn't want them to know, but is it harmful? Or construed as cheating?
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As long as it remains a fantasy, and there's no active intent to live the fantasy, it's not harmful. Saying out another person's name in the throes of passion is a different matter though..
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this is a tricky question, I think everything depends on your intention.
if a married guy flirt with a women and really want to be her new husband and keep call her every day and make plans they should move together and so on..is far more worse than a guy that pick up a girl after a barround with his buddies and after he had sex with her he go home and keep love his wife as nothing happens, he never had one feeling for the other girl.
men and women are VERY diffrent on sex, so far I know and experice a women must feel love to have sex, what most women dont can undterstand is men can really have sex with any girl without feeling or guilt afterwords, for guys sex and love is diffrent but for women it is same thing.
for most girls I heard the worst part of her husband had sex with an other women is not he actaly had sex with her, it is the broken trust and all sneaking behind her back that hurts most.
sometime cheating can be only way to keep a realtionship going on...you know grass always greener on other side fence, so by climb over fence(cheating) he/she can see the good and secure realtionship he/she currenty has is better and all thoughts of look for greenergrass will be gone.
I think more couple should be more openminded and let their partner to live out fantasis
if your realationship is strong and healty for both partners you have nothing to worry about he/she will come back to you. if not..it would probably happen sooner or later anyway, but you whould find out from someone else he/she cheating on you.
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Druzzil, you're right - men and women do have different views on sex, but it's not true that a woman must feel love to have sex. Perhaps some, but definitely not all, and particular not at this day and age.
And I also think most women do know that guys think with their other head - it's more a matter of acknowledging this fact and trusting their partner.
But I do agree that emotional cheating is worse than the physical sort. If my husband cheated on me with the former, I'll leave him, no doubt about it. But were it a one night stand, I may consider giving him a second chance.
It's fine to live out your fantasies so long as you lay your cards out from the outset. If there's an understanding that you don't intend to be mutually exclusive and your partner is ok with that, then seeing and sleeping with others is fine.
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