opinions of partner



ORIGINAL POST
Posted by apianviolet 17 yrs ago
Reading fishgirl's post about her friends' partner and how she 'wouldn't touch him with a barge pole' led me to a question...should you listen to friends/relatives' opinions on your partner? They are obviously more objective, so should their opinion carry some weight?


If you have had a string of not so good relationships, should you then question your taste in men and always seek the opinion of others? Or should you have faith that you've finally got your eye in, and hit the bulls-eye?



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COMMENTS
apianviolet 17 yrs ago
The only trait that my family have drawn my attention to is that he is Chinese...as if i hadn't noticed!


Comments like, 'we know you'll make the right decision' as in stop seeing him...and 'what would your sister think?' and 'it's every fathers' dream for his daughter to marry a chinaman...'


They haven't met him and I hope when, or if, they do, they will see the person he is rather than an racist cultural stereotype.


It's difficult as I want to feel happy I've met someone great but knowing my family feel this way puts a dampner on it. At least, on the positive side, their opposition has made me sure of my feelings for him before progressing any further.

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MahiMahi 17 yrs ago
From experience, even if someone did tell me what a useless sod the guy I like is, it would hardly change how I feel for him. I would only stop liking this person if I decide it myself.



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apianviolet 17 yrs ago
yeah, sorry aijin...i take a holistic approach life, obviously including my b/f problem (s)! ;)

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apianviolet 17 yrs ago
aijin, your perpetually perplexing post put a smile on my face :) i resolve not to worry!

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chris79 17 yrs ago
Hmm,

As far as apianviolets story goes, as long as your family hasn't met the guy they shouldn't judge him.

When it comes to my experience, my family so far has been right about my relationships, when they said it wouldn't last it never didn't. I am not sure if this was because of pure coincidence or by insight into mine and the girl's characters.

Anyway i tend to put my trust in their judgment even though it might take me a while to accept it or see what is really going on in my relationship.

I don't trust friends reactions too much, because I m not always sure what their motivations are to object or to reject the girl.

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