Feeling really down cause of break-up

Does anyone have any advice on how to move on and get over someone. My ex ended our relationship about a month ago, we are still on speaking terms but i am still very much in love with her and inside i still want her back. Each day that passes, i seem to get even worse, i can't concentrate at work and i feel really down. I keep really wanting to contact her but i know i shouldn't. I've tried all sorts of different theories...keeping busy at work, drink myself silly, go to the gym more, write down how i feel, talk to friends and family but nothing has worked, i'm just a wreck at the moment. It's not easy to just 'forget' her. I have a good friend who has listened to all my thoughts and given loads of advice but i'm still really depressed. How can i snap out of this?...

Time is the only healer. You will get 100's of recommendations of doing this and doing that, and you know what? Temporary relief from pain, sometimes. There is no magic cure.


Avoidance completely would certainly be one thing you need to do. You say you are on speaking terms, well if you are speaking to her at all it will not help. I hope you do not work together.


So again I can only offer the advice of time, it does heal things - eventually. If someone was to discover a cure for a broken heart they'd probably be the richest person in the world.


Sorry I can't be of more help. Best of luck dude.

Its tough and tempting after a breakup to keep playing that 'breakup tune' ....you know the one i'm talking about thinking about her, bemoaning why you break up and thinking how to win her back....all that is normal and sometimes you do win the girl back. But you're not really respecting yourself...you're not really loving you but more stuck in this image of romantic love for her.


Either she is the greatest gal and you've lost her....then deal with it and move on.


Or she is not the greatest thing ......which obviously means somewhere down the line you'll meet some else better



Working out and going out with friends is good.......do things that you feel are good for you and you enjoy.


good luck

Hey BBC82


Sorry to hear about your heartache, but i am sorry to say you are not the only one on this planet who has gone through the same thing, i think most of us can say we have experienced it. However i have got some good news for you. Did you know that our minds are designed to forget bad memories and hurt??? So it is upto us to let it fade away into a distant memory, we have the power. The problem is we choose to hang on. So I guess the best advice i can give you is to look at what has happened and dissect it into the good and bad memories. Keep the good and discard the bad once you have looked at them and learned what you can from it. Then like everyone else said move on and always remember; YOU ARE ALIVE, YOU ARE HEALTHY and there are plenty more pebbles on the beach.


All the best and remember you are not alone so take the time to reflect, and enjoy yourself and pat yourself on the back knowing you have the strength to carry on to another chapter

Hey cheers guys.


Since my initial post i have been up and down but i am truly thankful for the advice. I am trying to move on by going out more and to start dating again. Even though my ex is still very much in my mind, i'm gonna have to pick myself up and get myself sorted or she'll never get back with me again. No woman likes a loser!!!


Cheers once again :)

It is never easy to get over someone..TRust me. yet what you can do now is to spend more time with friends and party together..it will at least keep you busy for a while and ..try to know more gals...even they might not be the type of gals for you..Just friends..Its harmless. You should be quite busy entertaining new friends and should take around 3 months? I took 1.5yrs...and went wild...over a 8 yr relation that ended. now i am better again and deserve somebody better..

You guys are right. I got drunk and my emotions spilled over when i saw her out one night. I was trying to move on but i was kidding myself that i was actually moving on. I've seen her with another guy now (a colleague/friend of hers) who i had encouraged her to be friends with which makes me look like a total idiot now.


But anyway, i agree with your advice, i want to be speaking with other girls etc. and i have been but it's been difficult. It would have been the same advice i would've given to someone else in the same situation. The thing is i was truly in love with this girl and all my surroundings remind me of her so it's difficult to forget about her. I am trying so hard, but i walk past her work everyday, the place i saw her with her new man, the places where we went together etc etc.


I'm going back home for a short while just to recover from this episode. I've been really down, and everytime i pick myself up i seem to get knocked down again. I don't know what else to say but thank you for the advice. I don't know how long it will take for me to get over this girl, but i hope it is very soon cause this is agony.