Thinking positive in a relationship...

psychiatrist can't help you. what you need is psychologist/ relationship counsellor if you think you really need one. Psychiatrist is more for mental problem (real problem am talking about here, which would affected you daily life functions)


Just my 2 cents, you are too serious in your relationship and putting pressure to yourself. am not saying you shouldn't be serious. You should, in the mean time you also need to learn to enjoy what you have and lay some simply rules in your relationship. he's neat you are messy. If you two are living together, make rules like your space and his space. he keep his part as clean as he wants and you do what you like in your area. and what to do in the common areas. just like sharing with a house mate. about cooking, there;s plenty of chinese cooking are not oily, how about less oil or steam for a change?? or let him share the cooking and see how you like it !!. I know a very loving couple they eat different thing for dinner. why not? hey, you can eat the same thing on the table but not talking at all. or eating two different thing but enjoying each other's company and having a good time.


If you see this guy is a person to spend the rest of you life with, you have to know it all about compromise and respect each other's space.


In lot of case when people having such issues in relationship could lead to the childhood, relationship with the parents or the relationship of between the parents. if you think this bothers you so much do go look for professional help. look for psychologist or counselling. there's counselling services you can find online (not to do it online, but get phone no.). or else go to a GP (who has some psychiatrist or psychology training. who will understand if you have a very bad headache for days. except to check on you psychically is that anything wrong with your head but also will ask are you having pressure recently that stress coz you pain) than he or she will refer you to a psychology or who ever they believe they can help you)


You are not alone out there, most Chinese women has the same thinking - my most happiest is to have my love one feels happy. (ok, if anyone going to say Chinese woman want money and sh*t, pls hold on and post it somewhere else.) It is great but when you work too hard on it you will start losing yourself and get frustrated when you find other started to take advantage from you. coz they are not, they've spoil by you and just stop realising what you need. they think you are happy and satisfy. Tell you partner what you are worry about and work things out. relationship need two people to work it out together. if you are the only one doing all the work and he's not. that's the time you should think again is he the one you want to spend the rest of your life with.

i have some problems with my boyfriend as well.. and sometimes its all me.. nothim..yeah we have the same "im-messy-hes-not thing" coz i am messy..i am basically a slob and i work as a dh in hk.. butnits kinda differnt i a way coz if i am working,i knoew i have to do a good job with it otherwise thats it... i get the sack but when i am with him, i feel like its my turf.. i dont have to be entirely "organized-and clean" coz when i am with himi can be myself.. i dont have to worry about getting fired with him for doing a botched job.. but then again i stil have to do it.. it takes time to understand and reconcile with it though..but you have to.. my bf doenst exaclty like filipino food.. too "unusual" for him and his friends got this stereotype with filipnio women (Basically thinks tha filipnio women are "ho's)that i have to constantly fight against.. (im sure y'al are aware of what that stereotype is) i mean im no different coz i am a dh.. but it takes a bit of work on the girls part.. have been with my bf for more than a year now but we still have some issues to work on...



point is.. it takes a bit of patience and understanding fron the gf point.. ifyu love you gf as much as yu say you do... you can find a way to work on it... im still wokring on mine... its hard but you have to...


fight against what he thinks what a girl from your rac group should behave..


prove hin wrong... it will be hard.. but who knows..it may worth it in the end..


give yourself time.. and him too..

Why are you over thinking things? You can't agree on everything, my boyfriend and I have some very strong differences of opinion. Not everything has to result in an argument and not every argument has to result in a breakup. I've had some blazing rows with my boyfriend, but they just make us stronger. Making up is the best part!