is this normal.

New to the forum, so hi to everyone.


Around two years ago I was in a relationship with the girl of my dream.

We were together for just 3 months, but those here months of my life was the best ever.

We did everything together; I would drive her to work every morning, breakfast together watching every mouth full she takes, a smile on her face on every bite as I am the one who prepares breakfast every morning.

Lunch in the afternoon when she calls for companionship, I’ll be there outside her office waiting. It was a bonus for me as I get more time seeing her, so anywhere we go or food that we eat was simply perfect.

End of a hard day of work I’ll be at her office again waiting patiently, looking though an air-vent through the building to see when she would appear, making sure she was safe from walking down the stairs from her office, she is very clumsy with stairs.

The drive back home with the sun set most evening was very romantic, with her moaning about the days work as I listen with the occasional agree and nods of my head. Only one thing is in my mind that matters most, that is I get to share time with someone I love so much in matters of minutes heading home.

Dinner is cooked within 45mins as we set foot in the door, I try to cook something she like mostly, normally something with a hint of sweetness to the food, lemon chicken to name one. She would slip in to something more comfortable and we would watch TV and dine together, then of with her compliments to my cooking begins.

Normal end to dinner for us is to fight over who gets to wash the dishes, she wants to do them as I had cooked she claims, as for my say is “I want you to enjoy every thing in life that I could provide you with” I don’t want to see you doing something which I could do for you. Besides she is also clumsy in the kitchen, I just don’t want to see her getting cut.

We will then shower and of to bed for another beautiful day to come, so beautiful because the first thing I will see will be the one I love so much.

It was like clock work every working day, weekends we try to go places where the sun will shine and sights were nice, dinning out and enjoy being held close to each other ever step of the way.


At the time I had began working on my new business, and it wasn’t looking too good as the future to my business was very unstable and unsure.

The girl of my dream has plans for everything, and the failure of my business was the route of our break up.

We both know it wouldn’t work with out money in building a family together in the future. She had also had bad experience before a few year back.

In the end both of us decided it wasn’t the right time for us, so that was the end to us both, I guess the hardest part is breaking up at the pinnacle of our relationship, where both of us were still in love with each other so much.


A year and a half gone, I still think of this girl every day, there isn’t an hour of my life without her in mind, all the perfect or not so perfect come flooding my mind all the times. I still cry when I miss her so dearly on some nights, I know I need to move on but is really hard for me to do, as I have her in heart to this day.

She is with another now, and I turn to this forum to see if anyone could help me move on.


Thank you

HI Lopor


you know what ? i cry when i read this article .i dont feel my tears for long long time and you really make me impressed as a girl also .for sure this is very normal but mostly for girls .i can see you really love her a lot and thats very lucky for her ....but seems money or good life is more important for her than u ....i do feel this as you break up when your business is bad and she now with another guy.


you are really a nice guy ......thats why i cry when i read your written ....every girl is dreaming a guy in our life like you ...so no worry as long as you can come out of this ...you will easily find another dream girl

No one can help you move on, you have to face it yourself.


You will never be able to forget about someone you poured your heart out to, but you have to accept the facts and stop clinging on to the past and fantasizing.


Yeah, you will probably wake up every morning with her being the first thought that comes to your mind and the last before you could sleep, yet, over time, the pain will fade gradually, you will still miss and think about the person, but perhaps not as painful.


Accept the fact that she is just a person and she is not "perfect", by saying that she is the girl of your dreams, you have idealized her and overlooked her shortcomings. I know you would probably talk in her defense if I talk bad about her, but try thinking about this: For all that you've done for her, what has she ever done for you in return?


I know when you truly love a person you shouldn't be so calculating, and you feel that you are the luckiest guy to be able help her in each and every way and you question not how much you've done for her but were you not doing enough... but the fact is, she is a realist, so I guess you should get real as well, especially when things have gone South. At the time when your business failed, when you need her by your side for her support, was she there for you? She was the first to walk away. Are you sure that she is even "in love" with you? You think someone would desert the person she loves when he needs her the most? Think about that.


But yeah, life's a bxtch, I know exactly how you feel. Sometimes you feel that a part of you is dead when it ended... sigh.

"oneitis", the name of your disease. look it up on google.

she doesn't love u. she only loves ur money.


Move on and forget about her.

dont give up on you finding the right person to be with. you have loved, you have lost and so you will love again. enjoy the time you spent with her but appreciate that she chooses to not be with you. a bitter pill to swallow but once you can accept that, it will be easier.

and not all women choose security over love. i have chosen a guy who treats me like a goddess. there are women out there who would rather have love and trust than stocks and cash any day. good luck and keep the faith!

I think many of us have been smitten at some stage.


Some relationships are just not to be. This is for many reasons, so name calling serves no purpose.


But it is over now, and as the saying goes, you need to get over it.


It will take time. Go out, meet other people, date even. You may not think dating will work, but each time you date somebody you will get a little closer to normality.


One day you will be ready to move on. You may always have some feelings for the girls who broke your heart.


And remember, next time don't be so clingy and co-dependant

The wife of the now famous taiwanese director ang lee stood by him for 5 years when he was struggling to realise his dreams. She believed in him. That is a woman of integrity worthy of love and respect.


Your ex looked at what you could offer, not who you are. She was maybe in love with the lifestyle but not you.

Had a similar situation with a gf. She wanted a big house (which I now have ironically) and dumped me because I couldn't get one quick enough. At the time I would have lived in a tent just to be with her.


It hurts bad and it hurts for a while. The fact that it hurts shows you at least, loved her. And the worst part is that you have to accept that you can and should move on.


And it wont start getting better until you make the first move.


There is someone out there for you friend. Don't keep her waiting.


and good luck

if i were in the same situation, and i choosed to love you... i would to stay with you to build the business and everything with you... this is what love would do in my point of view... wealth never beat love.