leave him alone or stay stick with it?

my husband promoted to tokyo. he got 3 stages higher position due to company policy changes in the corporate office they cut off most of highest paid salary position. we all happy about the promotion, but we are so sad to leave from Singapore. we dont have choice, take the job to tokyo or leave the company! because with many competitors we need to keep him working for our 2 kids. we lived in singapore for 4 years, happy and can save money. he got the promotion, but the salary will be the SAME! and again, we dont have any option except resign from the company, and we thought thats gonna be difficult for 4 of us.


we arrived in Tokyo 2 months ago but we postpone the moving company until we find a fix house because we are still living in a temporary tiny apartment but so expensive! the food, fruit, milk, everything here are sooo expensive. and the school also very super duper expensive. the public transportation such as subway-train seems so OLD to me, very complicated and so much WALK to go.. its not simple and convenience like people always said on the news! the taxi drive so slow or sometimes vice versa! and they are so expensive too. the medication fee also very expensive and i need to pay 60 percent due to the insurance company is changing their policy.


beside these expensive things, i like Tokyo as a very safe city and the people are very polite and clean. but with the same salary like what we have in singapore, we cannot save money anymore.


This idea came to me several times, and i need your opinion. i am on my early 30 and my husband early 40. should i live in Singapore and leave my husband working in Tokyo him self? with this we can save 40% of his salary. we will fly to tokyo every month 2 times, asking the company to compensate ticket from the extra low house allowance because he will stay in a super tiny apartment (and it is possible to do). i can spend 10 days a month in tokyo.


do you think it safe for our marriage??? for me, im not interested to have sex at all since i have to do several medication for my ovarium cancer. andfor my husband it wont be so difficult because he is super busy mr. director! and i trust him. we grew together for the last 15 years.


my son's also very stress because of the culture drastically change... please give me your opinion.


thank you very much.

Good idea but be warned your husband will cheat in some way, shape or form...

Also bear in mind that adjusting to any city takes time and adjusting to a more expensive one is always a bit of a downer. You and your son will adjust. It's a bit radical after such a short period to up and leave. Wait and see what happens....

With you gone 20 days out of the month, your husband will be dating japanese girls in no time. The Tokyo woman are very sophisticated and approachable and I imagine even at his age with his job he will appear very attractive to them.

Call me stupid, totomum, but why can't you get a job? That would certainly help pay for things and then you wouldn't have to work. My mum had three children under five and worked two jobs. You could teach English or any other language that you might be able to speak. You could work in a library in the English speaking department, there are lots of options if you just try. I think you're giving up too quickly.


Your children are very lucky to have the experience of living all overthe world!

She has a job, it's called being a pampered stay at home trophy wife. I know a woman that raised two kids living in a cardboard refridgerator box in an alley. That doesn't mean i want to do it. Work is for people who cant find someone to support them.