LDR - What's the Point?

Hi guys!


As some of you may know, I am in a VERY happy relationship. We've been together for over a year now and our relationship has recently become long distance.


Sigh! We are both madly in love with each other, but LD presents a lot of problems. His move home is permanent and we have 4-5 lenthly visits planned for the year, which will be very nice. Hoever, neither one of us is ready for marriage at this point and I'm reluctant to make any kind of move without any kind of definite committment. We are not citizens of the same country.


So, my question is to all of you who have done long distance before... what is the point? Is break up almost always inevitable? If you have no definite plans of a future together, why stay together just because you love the person?


I can see myself getting married and having kids with this guy. I have never been with someone who is more perfect for me. But I don't know if I should be committing myself like this if there's no plan or guarantee for the future.


Help!


PS. I'm not interested in anyone else. I'm just worried about wasting time, money and heartbreak on something that might not pan out.Is ir worth it.


Success? Horror stories? Anyone?

I have a successful story to tell you, but that's not the point.

Follow your heart and never your reason. You will never regret it whatever is going to end.

Don't think about the future, live the present.

Cheers,

here is a few weeks' worth of readng material:


http://hongkong.asiaxpat.com/forums/womenonly/threads/56629.asp

http://hongkong.asiaxpat.com/forums/womenonly/threads/79922.asp


nearly every possible LDR story has been covered in those threads.


if i didn't have a son to consider and a job i love, i would have done what uoaini suggested and followed my heart.


there are very few guarantees in life...but you can do your damnedest to increase your odds of success.


best of luck joyfulone - hope your situation works out. :-)

Met my now hubby while on vacation, been in an LDR for the last 3 years, got married a month ago.


Did I think I was smart when I started this? Heck no. I knew it would be difficult. My heart said it was worth, he was worth it, WE were worth it...so I went for it. I have never met anyone like him before and I think it paid off.


It's tough. I miss him terribly. I wish I were there or him here or us somewhere together most of the time.


We could say that EVERY relationship could be a waste of time/money/heartbreak, not only LDRs. But we take a chance and see what happens.


If you love him as you say you do, give it a go. The worst that can happen may surprise you.


Join the LDR Part 2 thread here. We're all doing it....some dealing with it better than others, but we try. We tough it out and seek solace in those who are in the same boat. We're all different and no 2 relationships are ever the same.


Good luck!