Baby - good idea or not?

Im getting married this year and the original plan was to try to get preggy arounf half a yr after we get married.


I've been talking to my fiancee and some other people. They have informed me the below:

Right after you give birth, you

1) can't go out at night much.

2) can't go for holiday for around a yr minimum.

3) Even u go for holiday you have to bring your kid with you. That way you woudn't be blaming yourself while ur child is hurt back home while you are having fun.

4) Your child would turn your life inside out and upside down.


So you must do all the diffcult holiday (like going to Tibet / Nepal..type of places) before you decide to give birth.


Im a business woman myself. I want to start working after i give birth and i may set up a room for me and baby in the office. My fiancee thinks im kidding him but is this really not workable?


People may say "u sound like you are not ready" but i wonder when would i be ready to give up all the fun thing but to focus on the crying thing the whole day?


I love babies myself..but after hearing all that..im not sure anymore to have one for myself.


Any comments?

These are the thoughts women usually have before she gives birth. When you're a mother, you will know what to do.... and all the fancy plans you have now about wanting to work right away etc etc... you may not even end up doing. You can plan, and it's good to plan but be prepared to be flexible.


Here's my feedback.

1) After you give birth, you CAN go out every night if you like but you wouldn't want to because you won't want to be apart from your baby. He/she will mean more to you than frequent night outs with your friends. You'll appreciate the nights when you DO go out even if they aren't as often.


2) Nope, I disagree with this point. You can go on holiday WHENEVER you're ready. In fact, baby sleeps A LOT in the first year so it's easier and it's so nice exploring places with your hubby and bub in stroller.


3) Per point 2. You can still enjoy holidays with your kid. In fact, they will make even a trip to the park FUN. If you have to leave your kid at home, yeah, you'll feel guilty but they are young and they don't hold it against you. However, I have NEVER left mine at home if I could help it - minus the times I was hospitalised due to mastitis.


4) Oh yes, your child would turn your life inside out and upside down. Having a kid is a huge responsibility. When you've only had 3 hours of sleep during the night, the only person who could drag you out of bed is your little baby. It is extremely tiring but the joy you get out of it is soooooo worth it.


Personally I could not imagine my life without my little girl. This is coming from a mother who has just stayed up all night last night doing 9 loads of washing because my little girl kept vomiting and still needing to come to work.

In that case - what kinda 'sign' i can see that when im ready?

My worry is - i would never be ready? Before i know it - i will be too old?

Here are my thoughts on your post:


1) can't go out at night much.


---- Right. How I sometimes miss those night outs with friends but tell you what, I don't have as much fun as I used to have back when I din't have kids. Whenever I go out with friends these days, I'd still call home to check on my kids, whether they've eaten, what time they've gone to bed, etc. It's just a totally different you and even you will be surprised!


2) can't go for holiday for around a yr minimum


--- Why not? You can take your kid with you : ) You'll love it!



3) Even u go for holiday you have to bring your kid with you. That way you woudn't be blaming yourself while ur child is hurt back home while you are having fun.


---- It's not that you're worried getting hurt or somethin', it's actually the time you're spending with your kid which matters. When you have a kid, you want to have time with him/her and you'll enjoy every bit of that.


4) Your child would turn your life inside out and upside down.


--- Oh yes and you'll roll yourself with him/her too! It's the best part of being a mother! Moms are definitely right when they say "YOU'LL ONLY understand these things when you're a MOTHER yourself". Being a mom is a totally different experience.


I'm only 27 and I already have 3 lovely and energetic girls (6, 3, and 2). I can't imagine my life without them : )


I used to hang out till 5ish in the morning back in my "YOUNGER" days but ever since I had my first child, I just want to enjoy every moment with her. I still go out every once in a while but not as much and as late as I used to. It's different now that I have kids but I enjoy every bit of it. When you have kid/s, they just AUTOMATICALLY become your FIRST priority.

Non-parents will find this hard to believe but taking your child to the park is more fun than partying


--- damn right Loyd Grossman is Miss Venezuela :)