Posted by
whiskey
18 yrs ago
I've been with my boyfriend for almost a year now and although we haven't yet said th "L" word to each other, we have a fantastic relationship and I'm sure it will happen when the time is right.
I was just wondering if anyone can share their experiences about when and how they shared their first "I love you" with their partner?
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Say it when it feels right. There's no too soon or too late for it. Some people are afraid because they don't know how the other party would react or they won't say it back. Remeber, you're simply expressing your feelings. Your partner deserves to know them.
In my case, me and my boyfriend both felt right to word it at the same time, two months into our relationship. He said it first, and I wasn't really surprised or ecstatic because I knew the feeling was mutual. I'm glad we both feel comfortable expressing our feelings with each other as it's very important in a relationship.
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my then-bf now hubby said the "l" word after 1 week. i was freaked out when he first said it even though the feeling was mutual as i was too worried it would get too intense too quickly. but none of that happened, we have been together for more than 5 years, married for one.
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shaq
18 yrs ago
Is saying 'I love you' such a big deal .... definitely NOT, my dear. As one wise-saying reads, 'Actions speak louder than words'.. and, from my experience, that's sooooo true. Pay attentions to actions/deeds, not words that may be hollow afterall.
Have you heard the saying, 'it's earsier said than than'? If yes, be a discerning person and set a right relational priorities .... Why? ... Because, I'll hate to read a hurtful tread here from you. 'Love' in the phrase 'I love you' is a verb and, for that matter, it demands an expression/action. Ask yourself if you're witnessing this action.
As I have observed from a great number of broken relationships, people are often very hurt because theyhad put so much value on 'words' and paid little attention to actions/deeds. Peace out .... :D.
ShaQ
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Thanks Shaq - I think you're right. He's not very good at showing his emotions (typical alpha-male) but is always there for me and treats me fantastically.I guess the words will happen when they're supposed to...and at least if/when he does say the "L" word, I'll know he's being completely sincere.
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shaq
18 yrs ago
Whiskey >> Glad I could help :). Good luck!!
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Do you remember the saying"still water runs deep".Maybe"still love runs deep too." Is really important for you to hear or say "i love you"?
(i am base in peking)
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Whiskey,
what's so difficult about saying/typing the word LOVE? Why hide it behind "the L word"??? Is it a taboo word for you?
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Love is not a taboo word for me at all. I just realise the consequences of saying it to another person. As Pumpkin says - it shouldn't be tossed around lightly. I am just interested to hear when other people felt was the right time to say it in their own relationships..
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Aspect, you make zero sense.
Whiskey, do you want your boyfriend to say 'I love you' before you do? If you want to say it then I think you should, but of course only if you mean it and it feels right. I tend to say it when I truly mean it, regardless of the fear that he may not return the words. Isn't true love self-less and looking beyond yourself?
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Whiskey, for me it was after a year as well. And you're right, by the time he eventually said it I knew he meant it.
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Very true - I think once I get the over the obstacle of worrying whether or not me saying it and putting it out there will affect our relationship will be the time when I know it will be the right time to say "I love you" to him.
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tia
18 yrs ago
Whenever it feels right....usually best when it sort of slips out and you are not overthinking it.
Never in bed after sex for the first time. Bad idea.
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