This guy is my classmate (we go to a professional school and have a lot of common friends). We've been texting for a while. He said to have dinner last Thursday but had some work coming up so we cancelled it. Later that night, we both went to a school party. I was mostly with other guys that night. He called me later saying he felt bad that he like me but too many guys around me that he couldn't be with me for much time. So we decided to have dinner this Thursday so we can be alone. But so far he hasn't confirmed with me time and location. Should I contact him to confirm it? because I have a lot of social activities lining up, I don't want him to screw up my evening if he couldn't make it. I kind of like him but i think he's not making any effort here. On the other hand, I don't want to appear desperate. I would be very angry if he did it again.
so what's the acceptable time in advance that a guy confirm for the date? is he a player?
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Sounds to me like you aren't all that interested in him in the first place, I mean, who is so socially busy that they would feel like putting aside some time for a dinner that may or may not happen would piss em off?
Do you want to meet with this guy or not? If you do, then maybe you should drop him an sms and ask him what time he wants to meet instead of saying you don't want to look desperate. I mean, he has already made it clear he is interested but that you seem so preoccupied with other male company that it makes it hard for him to even approach you. How much more writing on the wall do you need?
In life its about what you want, not whether someone else wants you. If you want this guy, then show it. If you don't then don't bother. The day people stop playing games of childish cat and mouse would be a day I would be a sight for sore eyes, I tell ya.
A simple sms saying "So are we on for dinner tomorrow? If so what time?"
is enough.
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Thanks Justin. Last Thursday at the party I actually looked for him to talk, but he couldn't stay with me for 5mins. He's walking around with short attention span like a kid. Then when other ppl talked with me, he stood there jealous!? I told him I also want to spend more time with him after he told him he liked me. But he disappeared for a week. Earlier today I texted him to see if he can confirm tomorrows dinner. I said I need to make my schedule if he has any change. Then he replied if I have other plans go ahead make it, we can try to do something on weekend when he's less busy. I don't know what the hell is going on. He doesn't seem to want to meet me at all, whats the point of telling me he liked me? Just because he's jealous at that moment? I texted him because I have doubt... Did I do anything wrong?Â
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Oooh, I say run in the opposite direction, girl!
Dude sounds like a piece of work. If he's acting all jealous and pouty before you even have anything to do with him, thats not a good sign. And just coz he says he likes you doesn't mean you have to like him back.
Run for the hills! Lol. I'm serious, bad news bears, all around.
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Good so we have the same judgment then. I think if he cannot take the first date seriously, it's not gonna br good... I do like him but gonna get rid of him now. In future school nights out, I don't care how he feels anymore, I'll just chat flirt with whoever I want. I just told him: I asked him to confirm time b/c Im  doubtful he can make it. Since he seems always have more important stuff, I'm fine not meeting at all then. I also said I'm allergic to our appointment coz I never know if it counts. Don't know if I sound harsh but anyway  Â
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Well, as you said: "Then he replied if I have other plans go ahead make it, we can try to do something on weekend when he's less busy."
Erm, if a guy really liked you he'd have the balls to make the time. I think this one is not even worth your spare time then.
Plenty more fish in the sea.
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Exactamundo. If he really liked you then he would have made some time on Thursday or suggested a time on the weekend instead of saying he can "try" to do something at the weekend.
Majority of guys don't play games, just take them and what they say for face value. I think most of the time women can see a guy is not interested yet they try to hang on in there convinced there is something. If you haven't, I would suggest you watch, "He's Just Not That Into You".
Plain and simple. When someone's really interested in you, you will know.
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Thanks! So why do guys stick around sweet talk to you prentending they are interested but in fact not? It's always he suggested to meet alone for dinner. Why did he say this but not do it? Last time during call he even asked me to move with him to where he's gonna work and asked me to travel with him. I know it's just his wishful thinking and I didn't take it seriously. But he set the date for dinner I thought he meant it. Is that because he's too inconfident assuming I'm dating other guys that he may not have good chance？
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Is he French? If so, this sounds pretty typical judging from the French mates I have. They all act like this with women. Usually works really well.
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Today I figured it out. He told me he has a girlfriend. He was confused coz he likes me. He's not French. I don't want to screw up his relationship. I hugged him to call it an end.
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Good girl, phew, eh? That was close! Now you can walk away from this guilt free to flirt with other guys to your hearts content knowing that deep down, your gut instinct about something being a little iffy about that dude was spot on!
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To me it sounds like he is rejecting you before he can be rejected.
Was your text a bit like a brush off? "let me know otherwise I will go elsewhere (and do something better)". So he tried to fire back something about he is busy at w'end but may make time for you.
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What should I say? That night I was only suppose to hug him and call it an end. Buy he couldn't help kissed me. I'm not planning to do anything with him any more. Today I just found out he's married, it's not gf it's a wife. WTF??? He thinks Im idiot to say she's a gf??? We have 70 classmate common friends, some of them may already know his status, he said he has a gf??? I'm completely out of anger. What should I do next time I see him? Pretending not knowing him or punch him hard??? I obviously prefer the latter... What's wrong with the men these days!!!!!
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so maybe his lack of confidence was due to being unsure about his first potential affair, anyway whatever hey, those guys are a dime a dozen, no need to give him any more attention
...and what is wrong with men these days is this - they are spoilt and greedy. The societal pressure that normally restrains these primal urges has been eroded; it is male humanity at its most coarse and vulgar stage.
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Ack, bro tried it on and succeeded, or did he? You kissed him back? Or did you slap him good then?
*SMDH*
Yep, good that you found out about this, and I suggest you simply avoid the mofo like the plague from now on. Yelling or public slapping will only highlight the fact you had anything at all to do with him and then people may ask him and he would say you were interested in him, yadda yadda yadda....
Back off and let him find some other sap to suck into infidelity with him.
Many women find it hard to believe a married man would cheat, especially one they think is nice, but yeah, where there is a will there is a way...and if the opportunity poses itself, sometimes the man with a weak character finds it easy to say that he simply couldnt help himself.
Good luck avoiding said philanderer.
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