Posted by
nyu08
18 yrs ago
I'm a student currently studying abroad in Shanghai. I've got to say, this city is great, and I easily see why it has become a top choice for overseas Chinese (I'm sort of an ABC) or foreigners to fall in love with such a city. However, being a single male student in Shanghai, there are times of course when friends and alcohol don't necessarily fill the void in my heart. I've tried to engage girls in hopes of starting a relationship, but apparently girls here have a completely different concept of male and female interaction and any jokes I make (which are funny to my friends abroad as well as back home) seem offensive.
How would I be able to start a relationship, or for that matter, what girls to look for?
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Be honest. Let yourself be open to possibilities. Without trying, you'll exude that charming venerability and I must say, it drives the ladies crazy! Just be open, be sincere and be yourself!
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nyu08
18 yrs ago
Thanks for the replies, they really help. I will try my best and try out the different but equally valuable suggestions that you three have given me and see where it takes me. Advice makes for a great directional start and experience will carry me forward.
Once again, thanks.
p.s. any other replies are also very welcomed as I'm sure there are many others out there with much more experience in these relationships than me.
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To add to the original question -
How do you (guys) deal with the financal differences? Foreiger making what is ten times better than a local person but only average back home. Has anyone been or currently in a relationship where that issue has come up...I am in a realtionship where it may be getting to that point and some advise would help.
Like going back and not being able to spend the way you normally do here...how well does that go over?
Not to imply that we are all materialistic but lets be honest - we all get spolied and spoil others here.
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I know what you mean about humor being different overseas. I found that any labels (such as "liberal" or "conservative", "spiritual" or "open-minded" I attached to myself in the U.S. were interpreted very differently by people from other countries. Jokes tend to box one into a label.
In America, conversations begin with the weather and progress to job title. In Asia, you might open with a comment about the strength of your drink, move he conversation to a great new restaurant you happened upon, or the best way to get a flight upgrade. Laugh about the cultural bloopers you've made (we've all done it) and then ask about families and what they do in their free time.
If you've conversed that far and they haven't asked you about your portfolio, you may have found a girl seeking a relationship as you are.
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