I need help

I really need an advice here with regard to divorce in HK as it seems that divorce is unavoidable. I have 2 children (minors) and it seems that my Husband is having an affair and already expressed his wish to end the marriage.


I would like to know what to do and how to protect my rights and my children rights. I feel terrible. I have no income and he is threat to ‘leave’ me with nothing. He even says that I will loose my visa in HK and the kids will stay with him as I have no way to provide them and I will not be able to stay in HK.


I am afraid for my children. I am stresses and confused.

Is it a must to hire a lawyer? I have no money of my own, however we own a house. How can we resolve it without having the ‘nasty path’ of divorce that I hear so often from people around me?


Please help me.


Thank you

First of all take a deep breath and do not panic. It is time to stop listening to all the rubbish your husband is feeding you. He is no longer your friend.


Unless you have signed a pre-nuptial agreement with your husband stating differently, there is no such as "i have no money of my own." Everything you and your husband own, individually or jointly, eg. money and assets, belong to both of you, not just him. Although he might be nasty and temporarily blocks your access to it to make your life difficult, ultimately through the courts your will get your share.


Likewise it is not up to your husband to say whether you will lose the children, he is not the judge. It sounds like you have been a stay at home mum and the primary carer of the children, it is more likely you will be allowed to continue to look after the children than not.


You need to get legal advice NOW, even if you may not have access to a lot of money right now, explain to the lawyers you own a house, some firms are willing to postpone part of the payment until settlement comes along and you get your half of the assets.


Be strong and ignore whatever your husband is saying, he is not the law!


You can also contact Community Advice Bureau, they might be able to direct you to the right help. http://www.cab.org.hk/aboutus.html

You can qualify for legal aid if he is not giving you the money for a lawyer and if you have no income of your own. So look into that pronto.


Also...I hate to tell you this, gf, but divorce with kids IS a "nasty path". Not all of us end up all Demi Moore and Bruce Willis, hugging and happy with kids.


Your husband is already showing you that he is not looking to go down some garden path, he is choosing the "nasty path". He is threatening you in such a way that you worry for your chances of staying here, losing your kids and quite likely, your sanity!


I would say that out here, it doesn't matter if you haven't got a dime, the courts will not separate the kids from the mother. You need legal aid and legal advice, pronto! If you want to know a good lawyer, I can recommend one to you, their retainer alone is HKD3000 but I have to say that their retainer is still cheaper than other lawyers out there.


So yeah...good luck, and don't let your husband bully and threaten you into depression. He just thinks he is on solid footing when really, he is the one cheating and has no idea what kinda legal implications that has for his assets and his sanity.


Be strong. Remember, call or visit legal aid and then visit a lawyer to find out what your options are.

You need to get a good lawyer and quickly - do not give in to his threats. The children can be made war of court so that they can't be taken out of HK and if your lawyer is anyway decent you will be able to work out a settlement for support of the children. Your lawyer will advise on your visa status as well - good luck!