Loyalty

I always believed relationship is base on trust and loyalty. I also believed you will never cheat on someone you love.


the problem is, I really love my boyfriend but can't help that I fancy someone at work. and we kissed one night after a few drinks in bars. The attraction was mutual and I did not regret a bit. I don't want a relationship from this guy and I still love my boyfriend and no plan to leave him.


Now I have a doubt about myself being loyal in relationships. and actually how do ppl be loyal and in love in only one person for years and years?? am in LDR can I use it as my excuses?

T bone, don't take me wrong. I was cheated and felt like sh*t too. that's y am so confused now

I always thought a kiss is as small as a kiss but when you apply the reverse situation to yourself you would realise that a kiss is much bigger than you think. len is unfortunately spot on this time..leave him as you already broke the trust and even if you regret it it is already done.


As for TBone, you really need to speak with a professional.

Hahaha! I love Carmen's reply (as I so often do). She is exactly right!


You feel bad, don't do it again! <- that's your answer!

Don't make any bullsh** excuses for you to only make you feel better about yourself because by doing so, you were actually no different from the guys you had despised. If you still want a healthy relationship, start all over again.

the problem is my relationship is not health at all. i had no plan to leave him coz i thought if I be patient and work on it things will be ok. the fact is he was never ready for relationship and when everytime I ask to get out he alway asked me stay. and says it was me being impatient and pushy. Bottom is he never love me. He like me a lot and love to have me as a gal friend. it nothing to do with this new guy just at the end it's too obvious i was going no where with him. I know some ppl will say I am looking for excuses. but hey, I spent 10 months in this relationship, work as the best gf of the year for so long but in the end he still refused to love me (well, he did loved me for a few weeks, than he start to freak out than did stupid thing to push me away coz he simply not ready be in serious relationship again. and he admitted when we broke up)

TEN WHOLE MONTHS!?!?!?! You were in this relationship for ten months?! If it's only ten months, how can you be the best girlfriend of the year if you were only with him for ten months.


Please, a commited relationship should last longer than 10 months! Some people take time to fall in love, you can't expect someone to say he loves you after such a short time.


You sound like really high maintence. Try to think about what you want from a man, try to think what you think comes from a mutually happy relationship. Try to think about what is reasonable behaviour before you get into another relationship with some other poor man.

"the problem is, I really love my boyfriend but can't help that I fancy someone at work. and we kissed one night after a few drinks in bars. The attraction was mutual and I did not regret a bit. I don't want a relationship from this guy and I still love my boyfriend and no plan to leave him."


These things happen. As I see it, kissing someone after a few drinks is easy. As in "can happen in an instant". It's not the same thing as sleeping with someone. You don't do that "by mistake". It takes quite a bit of time and effort compared to just a kiss.


Of course this doesn't mean that you should just kiss people you fancy because "it happens". Just that you shouldn't be too hard on yourself, and it shouldn't mean the end of your relationship with your bf.



"how do ppl be loyal and in love in only one person for years and years??"


Hard work.


"am in LDR can I use it as my excuses?"


I guess. But why look for excuses? Excuses are useless. Look instead inside yourself and see what you want to do. If yo want to stay with your bf, then try not to do that sort of thing again. Also try to figure out if you kissed this guy because you want to leave your bf. I'm guessing you just kissed him in the heat of the moment.


People in long term relationships are human too.



"the problem is my relationship is not health at all."


This does not seem related with kissing the guy.