Lung cancer

by what stage does he?

My father was found lung cancer in July in the middle of stage 4...

What is inoperable by some may not be by others. Try the University hospitals which tend to be better.

I agree with Ruth, call. He knows he is short on time, and he is letting you know as well. I think you need to communicate your concern and your love. Say the things that need to be said. I would say don't worry about what you may say or how emotional you might be as a result of the call. It is enough that you initiate communication, and the rest will follow naturally. If he wants to talk, he will, and if he doesn't want to talk, he won't. The distance may be huge geographically, but all the more reason to hang together as best you can and be there for him in the ways that are possible. If you do feel too emotional to talk on the phone, send an e-mail or fax a letter. But by all means (and whatever means), get and give the family support you need. (You need the support of your family too, especially the support and comfort that he can give, believe it or not.) One other thing, consider getting a little camera for both yours and their computers so you can teleconference with them. It's not expensive or difficult, although your in-laws may need to get a young person to help them set it up.

Helen, how are things going? You've got too much going on with Ayi, new job, and this. Hope the job is fun and gives you some relief from stress rather than adding to it.

Pray to God. God shall heal.